All That You Can't Leave Behind
by ND-domer11
Summary: After Karen's death Lucas is left with the daunting task of caring for Lily. But he has some help from his friend Peyton, who is still struggling with her feelings for him. Will they become something more? Is Peyton willing to risk her future for them?
1. Prologue

_**Prologue: Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own**_

Lucas wasn't sure what woke him up at 3:00 in the morning. It was a toss-up between the jarring nightmare that had left his flushed face wet with tears, and the faint cries of a new born baby in the other room. He wiped his face with a shaking hand before using those hands to push his physically fatigued frame off of the leather couch.

Lucas stalked across the dark living room to his mom's old room that he, with a little help, had turned into a nursery a few days prior. After making all the preparations for Karen's funeral, Lucas needed a new project to keep himself occupied, as if taking care of a newborn baby wasn't enough.

But he couldn't sit still. He couldn't allow the callous reality of the predicament he was in, to sink in and take the root and shape of a grim future he wasn't prepared to face.

But for now, that future was at the very back of his mind. He was living in the present, devoting every ounce of himself to caring and raising his little sister Lily.

She had gotten her name shortly after Karen died. Lucas had a dream and in his dream, his mom told him to look for her in the lilies. A teary-eyed Lucas held the small child in his large hands and gave her the name.

Standing at his side, a picturesque model of a supportive friend, was none other than Peyton Sawyer.

Peyton was there through it all. She helped him put on his scrubs when they delivered Lily, she was there comforting Lucas while Karen was fighting for her life and she was there cradling Lucas in her arms when Karen passed away.

She was a godsend. Her kindness was overwhelming and inspiring. If there was any reason for Lucas being able to take his mind off his grim future, it was her.

Haley had been his best friend in title for as long as he could remember. Peyton might not have had the title, but she certainly was doing everything for Lucas that a best friend would do. Hell she was doing everything that a spouse would do, barring physical intimacy.

After Karen's death Peyton moved into his house. She had done so without Lucas having to ask and he did not protest.

Peyton's presence was what prevented Lucas from running at full speed to Lily's room from the couch at the sound of her cries. He knew that Peyton would be there (she was always there) to comfort Lily and rock her back into a peaceful sleep.

He stood at the doorway and watched as Peyton rocked Lily back and forth. Her hair swayed in loose curls as it lightly brushed against her bare shoulder, exposed by the loose white tee shirt that she donned as sleepwear. He couldn't help but marvel at her.

Almost as if she felt his very presence, she turned her whole body towards him, her features illuminated by the glow of the nightlight in the corner of the room.

"She's asleep," Lucas whispered in a feral tone.

Peyton, so aware of Lucas' presence, hadn't immediately noticed that the baby was no longer crying, which was why she had come into the room in the first place. She gently laid Lily back down in her crib as Lucas came over to watch the slumbering baby. It was then, as he came into a closer view, that Peyton noticed the faint tear streaks on his face and the grayish tint of his eyes. It should have been impossible to notice the off coloring of his eyes simply because the night light radiated a steely blue. Peyton knew those eyes better than anyone.

"Another nightmare?" she asked Lucas, in a hushed, soothing tone partially for the sleeping baby and partially for the purpose of comforting a shaken Lucas.

He swallowed, looking up at her with vulnerable eyes as he shook his head before moving his eyes to stare down at his feet.

She stepped forward, no doubt to pull Lucas in her arms, but he resisted, citing a sore shoulder and neck as the reason for his refusal to let her hold him.

"Maybe you should sleep in your room tonight. I'm sure that couch isn't doing your shoulder any good," Peyton suggested.

"No, I'm fine Peyton. The room is all yours. And don't worry about coming in to get Lily again, I've got her. You should get some sleep."

"I think she'll be down for the rest of the night anyway. Goodnight Lucas."

"Goodnight Peyton."

"Hey," he called out to her as he followed her into the room, "It means a lot that you're here Peyton. I mean it."

"I don't mind, Lucas. I love being that girl for you. And her," she added. "I'll see you in the morning."

And with that, Lucas was left alone in the darkness.

But he couldn't go back to sleep, not after the nightmare he just had. His dream was a repeat of his mother's final seconds. The sound of the flat-lining ECG machine was unnerving. Even though he was glad he was able to see his mom in her final seconds, the memory of it was so flagrant and it haunted him to his very core.

He stayed awake and thought about the lie he'd just told Peyton. There was nothing wrong with his neck or his shoulder.

When Peyton showed up on his doorstep immediately after the funeral with a large duffel bag and the intention of staying until she left for her internship a month later, Lucas couldn't say he was surprised. Peyton had helped shoulder his burdens throughout everything, not just Karen's death.

She was there for him when Brooke broke up with him. She was there when he started playing basketball again. And she was there making him smile, even while he was in the midst of uncovering Keith's murderer and dealing with the man that had abandoned him and his mom when he was young.

Of course he had been there for her as well. He could still remember the nights in his room after Peyton was attacked. He had no problems sharing a bed with her when he was protecting her and keeping her safe. She exposed herself to him. Not physically, but emotionally, baring her soul and her innermost thoughts. Well the ones that didn't involve her being in love with him. He really had no idea of her romantic feelings for him.

The biggest topic of discussion for them had been the internship she had applied for and how she was afraid that she wouldn't get it. And even more than that, how she was afraid that she _would_ get the internship.

"_So tell me again why you're such a wuss about going to LA?"_

"_I am not a wuss okay. I'm just….what if I go all the way out to LA and figure out that this internship is just a step backwards? The music scene out there is so filled with pretentious record execs that only care about making money and exploiting their artists. I don't want to have to compromise anything."_

"_So don't. Peyton this internship is just a stepping stone. You already have so much to be proud of, but who knows, you might go to LA and find yourself. You might decide that it's the place you belong."_

"_You mean away from my home in Tree Hill and….my friends?" _

_She eyed him slowly at the "friends" part. Since Brooke was also going to LA and then to NY shortly after that, Lucas was honestly the only one in Tree Hill she would miss enough to reconsider staying. But of course they were just friends, and she couldn't stay in Tree Hill because of a "friend". Could she?_

"_Peyton, I just…I don't want you to walk away from something like this and regret it. Trust me Peyton, regret sucks."_

"_Oh yeah?! And what do you regret?"_

"_All sorts of things."_

With Peyton leaving for LA in a month, Lucas had to exercise complete caution with his emotions. Of course they were friends at the moment, but with how amazing Peyton had been with him and with Lily, Lucas couldn't take any chances. And that's why the couch was a better idea than his bed. If she held him one more time, he wouldn't want her to let go. He'd be damned if she didn't realize her greatness in LA. And so went his thought process when rationalizing his lie to Peyton.

However, all the validation in the world couldn't help him escape the guilt.

She deserved more, much more.


	2. Beautiful Day

_**Chapter One: Beautiful Day**_

Peyton Sawyer woke up the next morning surprisingly well-rested. She rubbed her eyes and leaned over towards her alarm clock to see what time it was. Her eyes followed the cord extending from the clock, only to find that it was unplugged. Lucas.

"Good morning," she chimed at a Lucas, who was sitting at the kitchen table reading a newspaper. He looked surprisingly fresh and attentive, a huge contrast to the emotional wreck he was nine hours earlier. "Or should I say, good afternoon," she smiled.

"Sleep well darling?" Lucas joked as he looked up from his newspaper to meet her eyes.

"Yes, but that's beside the point. You unplugged my alarm. I was going to make you breakfast and feed Lily this morning."

"I appreciate that Peyton, but I wanted to fix you breakfast. And don't tell me that you didn't enjoy that extra sleep. You and I both know that you love your sleep," he said with a wink. "There's waffles, turkey bacon and fresh fruit on the counter. I even peeled the oranges and apples for you."

She smiled widely at him and he could have sworn he'd seen a twinkle in her eye. Maybe he was seeing things.

Peyton grabbed her plate after mouthing a thank you in Lucas' direction and sat down beside him at the table. "So is Lily asleep?"

"Yeah, I just fed her for the second time since I woke up this morning. The girl can eat. She reminds me of another girl I know," Lucas said as Peyton scrapped her plate while mumbling something sarcastic mid mouthful. Lucas chuckled at the comment, and let his laughter trial off into an awkward silence.

They both stared at each other as if silently acknowledging how bizarre their rapport was considering what Lucas had just gone through. It wasn't intrinsically bizarre to them (their relationship had always held a level of comfort) but in the midst of grief and tragedy sometimes they thought about how they _should_ act.

"So….while you were sleeping your phone rang. You left it in the kitchen last night."

"Oh really? Did you answer it?"

"No I wouldn't do that Peyton."

"You could have."

"Well I think they left a message. Your phone made that little beeping noise after it finished ringing."

Peyton walked over to her phone and smiled when she saw that it was Brooke that called. She hit the voicemail button:

Hey P. Sawyer! Just calling to see how everything is with you, Luke and Lily. Call me back when you get this because I have to tell you about this guy named Donnie that I met. He has this really hot brother who is currently in France and should be back in LA by the time you get here. Oh my God he is so hot……and has this amazing sense of style…….ok just call me back when you get this okay, love you bye.

Peyton laughed out loud after listening to the message that she only heard parts of because Brooke's rambles made her zone out.

"What's so funny?" Lucas asked.

"It's just Brooke being Brooke. She's trying to set me up with some guy in LA," Peyton mumbled nonchalantly.

"Oh well that's exciting," Lucas told her, realizing how overstated that comment was as soon as it left his mouth. It sounded almost like awkward sarcasm and Peyton didn't really know how to respond. Lucas sensed this and tried to clean it up. "I meant that it should be exciting to see Brooke and hang out with her in a big city like LA."

"Um…yeah I guess."

There was more awkward silence before Lily started crying and relieved Lucas from the conversation or lack thereof. The subject of Peyton going to LA was a sore topic, but one he couldn't stop thinking about. He needed her to go, if not just because it was best for her, but also because every day she stayed in Tree Hill he made himself sick thinking about how much she was missing out on because of him.

He just wanted her to be happy and it would be a burden off his shoulders to know that he wasn't stifling her happiness. That was all he wanted for Peyton and somehow he just knew that the life he led at the moment wouldn't or shouldn't be enough for her. She had to fall in love and she had to go to LA. Lucas told himself that over and over. Maybe Peyton could find refuge in that life the way he found refuge in her.

Peyton walked into Lily's nursery and couldn't help but feel her heart constrict at the sight before her. Lily was screaming her head off as Lucas tried everything in his power to give her what she wanted. After realizing that there was nothing else he could do, he laid her back down in her crib.

"I've tried everything," Lucas said in defeat. "I think she senses that her mother isn't here." He blew out a large breath that he didn't realize he was holding. An involuntary tear slowly trailed down his face and that was all it took. Peyton swiftly, yet gently grabbed him in her arms, careful not to place any pressure on his "sore neck and shoulder". She nestled her head softly against his, all while thinking that she had found her Mecca. She could feel his heart beating erratically against her collarbone. They stayed that way until Lucas pulled away, silently thanking her with his eyes.

"It seems like whenever we're in this nursery together, I'm falling apart," Lucas chuckled, wiping his eyes at the threat of offending tears.

"Lucas stop. Don't apologize for needing help. I've certainly leaned on you at times."

"But that's what friends are for, right?"

No, Peyton thought. I don't want to be friends anymore. I love you. I'm in love with you. I have been for as long as I can remember.

But she couldn't say it. Instead she mumbled, "Yeah, friends". Lucas smiled at her and gave her arm a gentle rub. Before she completely melted into his touch she suggested, "Why don't we all go out? I mean Lily hasn't really been outside of the house much and we can try out that car seat Brooke bought for her. It's such a beautiful day outside."

"That sounds nice Peyton."

"Okay. I'll jump in the shower and then we can head out."

----------

Peyton, Lucas and Lily walked out to the Comet and as Peyton headed to the driver's side Lucas stopped her with his voice, "Hey Peyt, you mind if I drive?" Peyton smiled, "Not at all."

Lucas handed Lily to Peyton and then walked around to the side of the car to secure the car seat. Peyton carefully placed Lily inside as Lucas watched. The baby was giggling and reaching out to touch Peyton's face as she made little faces at her.

They drove along savoring the post-card perfection of a summer's day in Tree Hill. Lucas noticed a wistful look of sadness on Peyton's face as he looked in her direction to check his side mirror. "What's wrong Peyton?"

"Nothing," Peyton said as she snapped out of the daydream she was having. "Today feels so perfect."

Lucas drove to the pier and parked in a nearby parking lot. Lucas hurried to the passenger side to open the door for Peyton and she laughed at his gesture. "You don't have to open the door for me."

"Umm I was just trying to get Lily out. You do realize that the Comet is a two door vehicle right?" Lucas winked at her. Peyton smiled back at him. They both knew that he could have gotten Lily out on the driver's side.

Lucas picked her up and grabbed the baby sling carrier that Haley bought him. He strapped the sling around his neck and shoulder and placed Lily's small body inside, hugging her close to his chest. Peyton's heart caught up in her throat at the sight of Lucas with Lily. Suddenly she thought of something. "Hey isn't this going to be hard on your neck?"

"No it's feeling much better. Thanks though."

They walked side by side down the pier, as people walked by fawning at the baby and at how cute the young "family" looked. An elderly lady gave them the most attention, even telling Lucas and Peyton that she could babysit the baby whenever they needed some alone time. Peyton laughed heartily at the lady, but Lucas was a little uneasy. "Sorry if this is uncomfortable for you."

"No it's not uncomfortable. It's fine Lucas, just fine."

They found a table in the shade to shield Lily from the bright sun. She started to get fussy and Lucas knew she was hungry….again. While Lucas fed her, Peyton's phone rang with Brooke's name showing up on the caller id. "It's Brooke, I'll just be a second."

She walked toward the ice cream vendor as she answered the phone, "Hey B. Davis."

"Hi, P. Sawyer, were you ever planning on calling me back? Too busy playing house with Lucas? I swear between him and Jake, someone should question your obsession with men who have children. I know Lily isn't Lucas' but you know what I mean."

"Brooke it's not an obsession."

"I know, I know. But seriously did you get my message about the hot guy I have lined up for you? Plus there are going to be so many parties by the time you get here. Oh and I made you a couple of dresses. How do you feel about fuchsia? …"

"Brooke, Brooke slow down," Peyton breathed out. "Look I don't know if I'll be needing those dresses."

"Peyton I know you get a lot of mileage out of the flannel, but you are much too sexy to waste it by scaring people off looking like a butch emo girl."

Peyton laughed at Brooke's cluelessness, "No I mean, I don't think I'm going to LA afterall. I'm going to turn down the internship and stay in Tree Hill."

"Because of Lucas and Lily?"

"No, because of me. Brooke I'm really happy here and yes Lucas and Lily are part of the reason for my happiness. It just feels right. I've been making myself sick at the thought of leaving them and I don't think an internship in LA is going to make or break me."

"So you're just gonna leave me out here alone?"

"Brooke please, you and I both know that you won't be alone out there. Plus, you know you're going to be in New York setting up your fashion empire when the summer is over."

"I guess you're right. So I'm guessing that Lucas is trying to talk you into going especially with that "you're destined for greatness" talk I heard him feeding you."

"I haven't quite told him yet," Peyton said shakily.

She finished up her conversation with Brooke promising to call her soon and let her know the verdict.

Suddenly she was extremely anxious about telling Lucas about her decision to stay in Tree Hill. Maybe, she thought, some ice cream should ease the tension. She bought two cups of raspberry sorbet, Lucas' favorite, from the ice cream vendor. Just as she was about to head back to the table, she saw something that made her blood boil.

Sitting in her chair and another chair, were two women undoubtedly throwing themselves at Lucas, giggling and gasping at the baby. She should have worn flannel today.

Either way, she was about to set these bitches straight.

Peyton walked over to table with ice cream in her hands and a fire in her eyes. She stood on the side of one of the girls and soundly, but not obnoxiously, cleared her throat. Lucas looked up and smiled at her. He gave her a "please help me get rid of them" look and Peyton smiled back. One of the girls spoke in a haughty tone, "I'm sorry were you sitting here?"

"Don't worry about it," Peyton politely insisted. Peyton then proceeded to bend down and kiss Lily, making her smile and grab at Peyton's face. Lucas lifted Lily into Peyton's outstretched arms, while the two other women looked on, their faces laden with embarrassment and jealousy. Peyton grabbed the bottle and began feeding Lily, not even looking up to see the women grab their purses and leave the table.

"The coast is clear now," Lucas laughed. "Thanks for helping me get rid of them. They were talking my head off and I couldn't even get a word in. I was trying to tell them that they were in your seat but they kept going on and on about how adorable I was as a single father." Peyton rolled her eyes, "It seems like they were just obsessed with single men who have children. Maybe you should get used to the attention," she said cheekily as she sat down in her chair and continued to feed Lily.

"I don't think I'll ever get used to that kind of attention," Lucas laughed. He spotted that ice cream that Peyton placed on the table, "Oh you got raspberry sorbet, my favorite!"

Peyton chuckled through her nose at Lucas' excitement. He immediately began gulping down his ice cream before noticing that Peyton couldn't eat hers because she had both of her hands full with Lily. He placed his spoon down and reached across the table to scoop a spoonful of ice cream for Peyton. She eyed him as he lifted the spoon towards her mouth. She froze, unresponsive to his action. "So am I going to have to make the airplane sound?" Lucas joked.

Peyton opened her mouth and Lucas fed her the bite of ice cream. She smiled in his direction, "Thank you. That sorbet is good." Lucas nodded and fed himself a bite of her ice cream. "Hey!" Peyton shouted. "I think you know better than to take a girl's ice cream."

"You don't scare me," Lucas said as he squinted his eyes and gave Peyton a wide smile that had her heart bouncing in her chest.

"Just wait until I finish feeding Lily, you're going to have that ice cream in your lap."

"You really have a thing for throwing dessert don't you? First cookie dough and now ice cream."

Peyton smiled at the memory.

"_Aww man I've got cookie dough all over me, it's even in my bra maybe I should take it off." Lucas peaked around the corner of the wall as Peyton threw another piece of cookie dough, "Sucker!" _

_Lucas walked in paced steps towards her._

"_You surrender?"_

"_I'm putting the lid down." _

"_Yeah well put the lid down in the sink and get ready to help me clean this up," Peyton said with feigned attitude. _

"_Yes ma'am." Peyton walked past him and headed towards the stairs._

"_Where are you going?"_

"_I'm about to take a shower." _

"_Way to leave me with all the work Sawyer. It takes two to have a cookie dough fight."_

"_Relax cookie boy. I figure that we both need a shower so I'll take one while you clean and then you can take one while I finish up what you started."_

"_I guess that makes sense, although I'm not sure you can finish what I start when you can't even finish what you start."_

"_Save the trash talk for when you win. Alright I'm heading upstairs; I won't be long."_

_Lucas started peeling cookie dough off of the floor and laughed to himself as Peyton started singing in the shower. Not long after, the water stopped and Lucas heard Peyton scream. He ran up the stairs and busted through the bathroom door. "Peyton are you alright?" She was behind the shower curtain and Lucas could see her silhouette crouched on the floor of the tub._

"_No I was putting my shampoo back on the ledge and I knocked my razor off the ledge and it fell on my foot. It's cut pretty bad."_

"_Ok well we need to get you cleaned up."_

"_I know but I'm naked and the first aid kit is under the sink," Peyton laughed._

_Lucas felt slightly embarrassed but he wasn't going to leave her. "Well here's a towel. Dry off quickly and come out so I can stitch you up," Lucas said with obvious concern. He handed Peyton the towel by extending his arm around the shower curtain so he couldn't see her. _

_After Peyton dried herself off and stepped out of the tub, she took a seat on the toilet. Lucas knelt down and held her foot, which was wrapped in a blood soaked face towel. He took the first aid kit and sprayed her foot with an antibiotic adhesive that sealed up the cut. He rubbed some cream on her foot and then wrapped a bandage around the sole of her foot. "All done."_

_Peyton said thanks and stood up reaching out for her robe. They were silent as Lucas washed the cream and blood off of his hands in her sink. Peyton turned around and smirked in Lucas' direction, "You snuck a peek didn't you?"_

"_I think I should take that shower at home," Lucas laughed as Peyton chased him out of the room with a plunger she picked up._

"What are you smiling about?" he asked.

"The cookie dough fight that we had," Peyton responded. Lucas smiled. "I still can't believe you snuck a peak under my towel when you were fixing my cut," Peyton smirked. Lucas laughed. "I was just joking, I wouldn't sneakily look under your towel," Lucas pointed out.

"So I hate to do this, but I need to ask you for a favor," Lucas told her. "Lucas you know you can ask me anything. What is it?"

"I need you to please watch Lily tomorrow morning and afternoon."

"No problem," Peyton said quickly. "May I ask why?"

"I have an interview. Remember I told you that Whitey was letting me assistant coach for that D2 school that Nathan is playing for?"

"Yeah."

"Well he's making me interview for it even though I've technically already got the job. Plus I have to meet with the potential buyers for my mom's café tomorrow."

"So you're definitely selling it?"

"I really can't take going back in there. But I also need to apply for another job this summer since the coaching job doesn't start until September."

"Wait why do need to work this summer? Isn't the house paid for and I remember you told me that Keith left you some money for college."

"The house is paid for but I still have to worry about utilities and food for Lily. She needs health insurance and diapers too. As for the college fund Keith saved for me, I'm passing it down to Lily. I mean, she never had the chance to meet her dad and I think she should have something from him. He's already given me some great memories."

"That's…very honorable Lucas."

"God there's so much I have to decide," Lucas mumbled. "My mom had about 10,000 saved in her account that she left me so maybe I don't have to work this summer. Besides, Lily is way too young to leave her with a babysitter. I just don't trust anyone besides Haley since you're going to be in LA for the summer." Peyton was about to tell him about her decision when he continued, "I think I'll just stay with Lily for the summer and use the 10 grand for food and utilities or in case she gets sick and then in the fall I can work two jobs and have a nanny come stay with us. By that time Lily will be around four or five months old."

Lucas was so deep in his thoughts that he hardly heard Peyton speak. Or maybe he couldn't believe what she had said. "Wait what did you just say?"

"I'm not going to LA."

"What!? Why not?"

"I….uh," it was on the tip of Peyton's tongue. All she had to do was tell him she loved him.

"They rescinded their internship offer," Peyton mumbled without meeting his eyes. She lied. "They just called today and told me."

Lily had fallen asleep in her lap. Lucas pulled his chair around the table as close to Peyton's chair as possible. "I'm so sorry Peyton. I really wanted you to have that experience. You deserved it, and if they can't see that, then fuck 'em."

Peyton's eyes went wide at hearing Lucas swear. She'd heard him do it before, but it definitely wasn't a part of his ordinary vocabulary. He sounded so sincere and genuinely disappointed for her, mad even. Lying to him really sucked, but it was necessary, for her happiness, and for him and Lily.

"So have you told your dad?"

"No, but he was supposed to fly out to LA when I got there to help me set up my apartment. He put up the house for sell."

"Maybe you can tell your dad not to sell."

"I could but he already has some offers and my stuff is already in storage. I don't know if I want to stay in that big house by myself anyway," Peyton pointed out. A moment of stagnant silence passed between them before Lucas reached out to touch her knee.

"You can stay with me if you want. I know that a two bedroom, one bathroom house with a baby isn't the most enticing place to stay, but you can stay as long as you want. At least until you figure out what you want to do."

"Thanks Lucas. I would love to stay with you and Lily but I don't want to—"

"Cut it out Peyton, you could never impose on me. I just don't want you to feel obligated—"

"Lucas I know I'm not obligated to help you with Lily, but I want to. And I want you to be able to trust me."

"I do," Lucas said without hesitation. "I don't think there's anyone I trust more with being around Lily…and me." Peyton smiled and placed her hand on his.

Yep, Peyton thought, today is a beautiful day.


	3. Some Days Are Better Than Others

_**Chapter Two: Some Days Are Better Than Others**_

Nighttime had arrived in Tree Hill as Lucas, Peyton and Lily arrived home from their day in the sun. They went to the beach after their time on the pier, and after Peyton revealed that she was staying in Tree Hill, there seemed to be a weight lifted off of both of their shoulders. Although Lucas was disappointed for her, he couldn't help but feel a bit calmed with the knowledge of Peyton's indefinite presence in his life. He even allowed himself to admire Peyton's legs while they were on the beach, a throwback to his younger days of unsophisticated innocence.

Lucas had successfully put Lily to sleep for the night (or so he hoped) and he was ready to retire to the couch with one of his books. However when he stepped out of the nursery, he noticed a long-legged obstacle blocking him from his intended book/couch destination.

"We need to talk," Peyton said sternly.

"That doesn't sound good," Lucas mumbled as he sat down next to her on the couch.

"Since I'm living here for the time being, I think you should really go back to sleeping in your room," she stated.

"Peyton I'm not going to let you sleep on my couch like some estranged visitor."

"I was thinking we could sleep in the same bed together," she said pointedly. "I mean we've done it before, plenty of times actually."

"Yeah but that was because you were afraid of psychos attacking you in your sleep," Lucas joked. "I just thought that you would be more comfortable with the room to yourself. I know you've spent a couple nights in my room as a guest, but you've never shared a room with a guy right?"

"I shared a room with Jake."

"But you were also dating him, right?"

"Not at first."

"Oh," Lucas said dryly. Why was the thought of Peyton in bed with Jake making him queasy?

"Lucas, you sleeping in your room would make me feel more comfortable with living here because then I won't feel like I'm putting you out. I know you're going to say that I'm not, but I can't help but feel that way. If it makes you uncomfortable to sleep in the same bed with me, then I'll drop it."

"No it's not that Peyton."

"What is it?

Yeah Lucas, what is it? "Lately I've been kind of a wild sleeper and I've been having nightmares," Lucas countered. That was actually true. His nightmares about his mom had caused him to wake up abruptly and break out in cold sweats during the night.

"That won't be a problem Lucas," Peyton responded. "So what do you say?"

"Okay. Just make sure you keep those legs on your side," he smirked.

"I make no promises," Peyton declared, holding her hands up. "Well now that I've gotten that off my chest, I'm heading to bed."

"I'll be there in a bit," Lucas added as Peyton disappeared into the darkness. He pulled out his phone and started typing a text to Haley. It read: Can we meet tomorrow? Need advice on something. To which Haley responded: It's Peyton isn't it? To which Lucas responded: How did you know? To which Haley responded: It's always about your precious Peyton.

Lucas could only smile at Haley's response.

-----

Morning came for Peyton Sawyer at 5:30 am. She set the alarm on her phone instead of using the clock. She looked over her shoulder and saw that Lucas was positioned perfectly on the other side of the bed with his back facing her. So much for him being a wild sleeper. He didn't even snore.

Morning came for Lucas Scott at 6:30 am. He rolled over to find the other side of the bed empty. He slowly came to awareness, stretching across the sheets, inhaling the scent of the linens. They smelled entirely of Peyton.

He walked into the kitchen to find breakfast on the table and Peyton sitting at the table holding a sleeping Lily. They looked perfect together. "Good morning."

"Hey Luke, sleep well?"

"Very well," Lucas confirmed. "Thanks for making breakfast, it looks great."

"So what time is your interview?"

"It's at 8:30. I should be back home around noon."

Peyton nodded and glanced at Lily, "Looks like we're having a girl's day aren't we Lils?"

"So have you decided what you're going to do this summer? Are there any other internships in LA or NY you could apply for-" Lucas asked.

"Actually I just want to stay in Tree Hill," Peyton said quickly. "Besides it's too late to apply for summer internships. I talked to my dad this morning and he suggested that I take some summer classes. He transferred some money into my account so we'll have more of a cushion financially in addition to the 10 grand your mom left you."

"We?!" He cut her off. "Peyton, whatever money your dad sends you is yours. And I'm not accepting any rent so don't even think about it," Lucas snapped.

"I'm not thinking about it. I already wrote the check, it's on your desk."

"Peyton—"

"You should get going, you don't want to be late," Peyton interrupted, not intimidated by his aggressive insistence. "Lily and I are going to take a nap on the couch."

Lucas finished his breakfast, showered, dressed and placed two kisses on the forehead of a sleeping Lily and Peyton before heading out the door.

-----

Haley looked through the peephole of her apartment door and opened the door, pleased to see a familiar face.

"Hey Luke," Haley hugged him before moving aside to let him in. "How have you been," she mumbled, a bit of sympathy lacing her tone.

"Some days are better than others," Lucas responded. "How's my nephew?"

"He's just fine, sleeping as usual."

"Lily's the same way. Before I left to meet with Whitey, Peyton and Lily were both knocked out on the couch."

"Speaking of Peyton……" Haley gave Lucas an anticipatory glance. "What's going on with you two?

"I guess I should start with the fact that Peyton's internship fell through and now she's going to be living with Lily and I…..indefinitely."

Haley's eyes got larger at Lucas' reveal, "So is that a good thing?"

"I don't know Hales. There's a part of me that's happy that Lily has a female presence around in Peyton, there's the good friend part of me that doesn't want Peyton stuck in Tree Hill away from her dreams and then there's the selfish part of me that loves having Peyton around because she makes me happy."

"Are you in love with Peyton?" Haley asked bluntly.

"I don't know," Lucas stated. "I'm not even sure if it matters."

"Of course it matters," Haley pointed out.

"What I mean is that even if I'm in love with Peyton, and by some outside chance she's in love with me too, I don't know if I would be happy with Peyton placing herself in the position of pseudo wife and mother for me and Lily."

"Why do you assume she would do that?"

"Because she's practically doing it already and we're not even having sex," Lucas joked. "But seriously sometimes I can't help but wonder what she's getting out of the deal. Her dad is sending her money so she could easily get an apartment if she wanted to. And then she wouldn't have to deal with a crying newborn and a brooding squinter. "

"Lucas I know you're convinced that no woman could ever be happy as a pseudo mom and wife to you and Lily, but maybe….you're wrong. Maybe you're ignoring the possibility that Peyton is happy. Maybe this is actually what she wants, even more than being in LA. I know it probably seems weird that an 18 year old girl would want to live this life, but Peyton is different and I think you know that."

Lucas sighed and scratched his head, knowing that Haley was right. "You make some valid points Haley, but even if Peyton is happy with Lily and I, who's to say that this life is what's best for her? I know I'm not her dad or anything and I can't tell her how to live her life, but I still think it's my place as a friend to look out for her. Sometimes what makes someone happy isn't always what's best for them."

"You make some valid points as well," Haley conceded.

"So what should I do Hales? How should I handle this?"

"Ultimately you should do what you think is best for you, Peyton and Lily."

Lucas looked at her as if to say, "not helping".

"Lucas if I were you, I would just let everything fall into place instead of forcing yourself to feel a certain way or make assumptions about how you think Peyton should feel. If you let the situation take its course you'll be able to answer the question of whether or not you're in love with Peyton."

"But why don't I know now?"

"Because you've obviously been holding back and that's not fair to you or her."

Lucas took a second to let her words sink in. "I knew you were good for something Haley," Lucas teased.

"So have you found someone to rent out the space for your mom's café?"

"I met with someone today, but it didn't pan out. I know I was freaking out earlier about my money situation but I've decided to live off of the $10,000 my mom left me until I start working for Whitey in the fall. I'll be able to take care of Lily full time while Peyton takes summer classes."

"Sounds like you've thought this through Luke," Haley smiled proudly.

"I have. Well I better get home to my girls," he joked. "See you later Hales."

------

"Brooke you did not have to send me any dresses," Peyton said with slight exasperation. She was trying to feed Lily but the little baby kept grabbing at her shirt and burying her face in her chest. "It's not like I'm going to need any formal wear."

"You never know Lucas might ask you out on a date," Brooke informed.

"I doubt it," Peyton said resolutely. "I don't think he sees me that way anymore. He seems kind of closed off with me at times, which is understandable since he's grieving the loss of his mother, but it still doesn't bode well for any potential romance. Besides, I didn't stay in Tree Hill to try and pressure Lucas into dating me. I'm here because I don't want to leave them behind and because he needs me."

"But what about your wants and needs?" Brooke acknowledged. "I mean, when was the last time you had sex?"

"Brooke!"

"Wow it's been that long?"

"Yeah it's been quite awhile," Peyton admitted with a slight chuckle. "But I don't need sex Brooke."

"Maybe not, but everyone wants affection or at least some one to admire them."

"What are you trying to say Brooke?"

"I'm trying to say that maybe…..you should consider opening yourself up to the possibility of dating someone other than Lucas."

"Brooke—"

Brooke interrupted, "Clearly Lucas isn't ready for you, so I'm saying that you shouldn't ignore the option of dating someone else, or at least having a little fun. It's not like you can't be there for Lucas and Lily and still have a life of your own. And it might help Lucas realize his feelings for you a little quicker. "

"Brooke I'm not going to try and make Lucas jealous, _if_ my dating another guy would even make Lucas jealous."

"I'm not saying you should try to make him jealous, I'm just saying that it would be a bonus."

"I get what you're saying, but I still don't know if that's what I want. If Lucas wants to be with me, then I want it to be on his own terms. But you're right about me opening up to meeting more people. I just enrolled in classes at UNCW for the summer so it's probably inevitable anyway."

"That's all I'm saying Peyton."

Just as Brooke responded, Lucas walked through the front door with a large pizza in his hands.

"Lunchtime!" Lucas exclaimed as he opened the front door.

"Alright Brooke, I'll talk to you later. Thanks again for the dresses."

"No problem, call me if you need me P. Sawyer."

"Hey you," Lucas greeted the active Lily wriggling in Peyton's arms. "And you," Lucas added tilting his head up to look at Peyton.

"Oooh you brought pizza," Peyton exclaimed. "My hero," she mumbled her mouth full of chicken, pineapple and mozzarella cheese.

Lucas laughed and grabbed a slice for himself.

"So how was your day Luke?"

"It was pretty good. It was nice to see Whitey again and talk about old times. I couldn't sell my mom's café, but it's not really a big deal…Oh and I went to see Haley."

"How was your day with Lily?"

"It was pretty great. I could get used to spending a lot of time with her."

"I think Lily could get used to it as well," Lucas pointed out. Lily had fallen asleep nestled securely against Peyton's chest.

"I'll go put her down for a nap."

When Peyton came back Lucas took the opportunity to talk about what happened that morning. "Peyton I'm sorry for snapping at you about the rent check."

"Don't be. I'm starting to realize that you don't really want my help, and I can't force you to take it."

"That's not it Peyton. I just don't feel right accepting money from my friends. Especially you. Lily and I are fine financially and I want you to save your money if you're going to school this summer."

"Speaking of…. I already enrolled in a couple summer classes at UNCW. I start in a week."

"That's great Peyton. What kind of classes are they?"

"One of them is an intermediate art class and the other one is an art history class."

"You'll do great."

They spent the rest of the day talking and laughing until they fell asleep side by side, slightly closer in proximity to each other than they were the night before.


	4. If You Wear That Velvet Dress

_**Chapter Three: If You Wear That Velvet Dress**_

Two weeks into Peyton's summer classes and Lucas was forlorn. Peyton had a pretty large workload and even though she only had two classes, her professors were intense. The banter filled conversations Lucas and Peyton had once engaged in with regularity, were now few and far in between. It wasn't that Peyton was never at home, it's just that when she was, she was always doing schoolwork. Without question Lucas missed her but he was thankful that she was still spending time with Lily. She always made time for her.

He was still struggling with the memory of his mother as well as his feelings for Peyton that he was just beginning to come to terms with. It was hard not to look at Lily and not think of Karen just as it was difficult to look at Peyton without thinking about things that he wasn't ready for.

Peyton was indirectly following Brooke's advice and giving Lucas some space. She wasn't one to prod and push Lucas into opening up to her, although in the past she never had to. Things were different now and Lucas had definitely closed himself off.

So for the time being Peyton was putting her time and effort into finishing a huge group project for her art class.

"Adam did you finish what we were working on in class? I know you said you would finish up those sketches since Chelsea already completed her portion of the assignment," Peyton said into the phone while standing at the stove testing the temperature of Lily's milk on her wrist.

"Yeah I finished most of the sketches I just want your feedback on a couple of the ones I've done. Can we meet somewhere and go over what I've drawn?"

"Actually my friend is out and I'm babysitting for him. Do you think we could meet at a later time?"

"Him?"

"Yeah him," Peyton confirmed. "Is that a problem?"

"No but um…actually I have plans tonight so can I just meet you at your house right now?"

"Umm let me check with my roommate and I'll call you back."

Peyton hung up the phone and dialed Lucas' number. "Hey Peyton, is everything alright?"

"Yeah everything is fine; I just wanted to run something by you. Someone from my art class wants to come over and work on something for our project. Is that alright?"

"Sure. I'm cooking dinner tonight so if she wants to stay for dinner, tell her that she's more than welcome."

"He isn't staying long; he has plans."

"He?"

Am I not speaking clearly or what, Peyton thought. "Yes he…is that a problem?"

"No no, it's fine Peyt. I'll see you shortly."

----

Adam Anderson was a lot of things, but apprehensive was not one of them. He had always been confident when approaching women he liked, but Peyton was a special case altogether. She made him feel a very different range of emotions than he was used to. He wasn't arrogant per se, but he also didn't have much experience with rejection.

Adam was a lean six-foot two inches with black curly hair that covered his forehead and draped just above his big piercing brown eyes. He was of Jewish decent, half Jewish to be exact, and he had a beautiful smile that gave him the typical boy next door quality.

Over the past two weeks he and Peyton engaged in many conversations, partly because they had been assigned to permanent groups for the duration of the class and partly because he was really forthright in striking up conversations with her. She was still very much a mystery to him, but he managed to learn a few non art related things about her life.

Adam pulled in front of Peyton's house and grabbed the project from the backseat of his brand new Mustang. He checked his appearance in the rearview mirror before stepping on to the porch of her house. He knocked rapidly on the door, but not very firmly, as he was still trying to get a handle on his nervousness. Without really noticing, he started to shift from side to side in anticipation of seeing Peyton again.

She opened the door with one hand with Lily securely tucked in her other arm. "Hey Adam."

"Hey Peyton," Adam greeted as Peyton opened the door and guided him to have a seat on the couch.

"Cute kid."

"Yeah she's a cutie," Peyton agreed, playing with Lily's hands. "So Lucas should be here any second to grab Lily so I can have my hands free to tear those awful sketches in half," Peyton joked.

"You haven't even seen my sketches yet. Although you're probably just bitter because these sketches are better than anything you've ever drawn in your life."

"Oh yeah that's totally it," she said fastidiously. "But seriously I'm pretty sure I can draw better than you with my left hand than you can draw with your strong hand."

Adam smiled. "Well that must be a pretty magical, paranormal hand," he pointed out. "Come to think of it," he grabbed her left hand and examined it as though he'd never seen anything like it before, "this hand does look pretty weird."

Just as Peyton was about to offer her rebuttal, Lucas opened the front door. Peyton followed his eyes to her hand, which was currently enveloped in Adam's hands. She abruptly freed her hand from Adam's grasp to stand up and introduce the two of them. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything," Lucas said uneasily. Adam was busy wondering why this guy had a key to her house.

"No you weren't. Lucas this is Adam, a classmate of mine," Adam extended his hand out to Lucas who gave his hand a firm shake. "Adam this is Lucas, my roommate and good friend."

"Nice to meet you."

Adam was visibly surprised when Peyton introduced Lucas as her roommate. He assumed that Lucas was only picking Lily up and going on about his business. Peyton took a moment to smile at his befuddled expression.

Lucas, on the other hand, was very uncomfortable in the current setting but he smiled what he hoped was a sincere smile. "Well if you need me I'll be in the kitchen after I put her down in her crib," Lucas grabbed Lily from Peyton's arms and headed towards the nursery.

Peyton could already see the questions percolating around in Adam's head, "Lily is Lucas' little sister, he's caring for her in the absence of his mother."

"It's none of my business Peyton; you didn't have to tell me that."

"I know but your perplexed facial expressions are way too painful to look at." Adam laughed heartily at Peyton's honesty. "You should smile all the time," she continued.

_Was she flirting with him_? he thought.

He had never valued candor all that much in women, but somehow Peyton even managed to make the truth sexy.

"Alright let's see if you drew those sketches blindfolded again."

----

For the next couple days Lucas didn't mention Adam or anything concerning Peyton's art project. Peyton hadn't either until….

"Guess what?!" Peyton exclaimed when she busted through the front door after getting out of class.

"What's up?"

"My group got an A on that project we had been working on! I really wanted to do well on this and it's a huge part of our grade."

"That's great Peyton! I'm proud of you," Lucas said sincerely. "So now what?"

"Now….we party," Peyton smirked, twiddling her fingers together mischievously.

"We? I didn't help you guys get an A."

"Oh but you did. For the length of this project, you've cooked dinner for me every night, and everyone knows that good nutrition is essential to cognitive functioning and…well….any functioning," Peyton smiled. "Without your culinary efforts, I would have dropped dead and the lack of my amazing art skills would have caused the group to get a C at best." Lucas laughed at the satire.

"Well you when put it that way, I'm glad my contributions to the project haven't gone unnoticed."

"No they have not, that's why you, Adam, Chelsea and I are going to a restaurant slash bar that Adam's dad owns and then possibly to a club tomorrow night…if that's okay with you."

"But who's going to—"

"I've already asked Haley and Nathan if they could watch Lily tomorrow night and the morning after. So what do you say?"

Lucas had a feeling he'd be uncomfortable in that setting, considering he didn't really know Adam or Chelsea, but he wanted to support Peyton. "Of course."

Peyton smiled. "So what's in the bag?" Lucas pointed at a big bag that Peyton carried into the house.

"Umm I went to the mall and picked up a few things."

"Ooh did you get me anything?" Lucas joked.

"Actually I did."

"I was joking; you didn't have to get me anything."

"I know, but I wanted to," Peyton shrugged. She pulled out a crisp blue Calvin Klein collared shirt that perfectly complemented Lucas' eyes.

"Wow…this is…thank you," Lucas said graciously.

"You can wear it tomorrow if you like, or you can let it collect dust in the back of your closet."

"I'm going to wear it tomorrow," he stated. "So what else is in the bag?"

"Damn you're nosy," Peyton smirked.

Peyton pulled out a box from the bottom of the bag and placed it on the table. "I bought a pair of shoes for tomorrow." She opened the box and Lucas spotted a pair of 4-inch red pumps. Oh no. She was probably going to wear that strapless red and black velvet dress that Brooke sent her.

The day Peyton got the dress in the mail, Lucas hoped to God that she wouldn't wear it. He was pretty at ease with Peyton's current wardrobe of choice: jeans, sweats, t-shirts and the occasional pair of Chucks. When she showed him the dress, all he could think about was how short the hem of it seemed for a woman with Peyton's legs. There was no way that dress would be any lower than the tops of her thighs. God help him. It was one thing to picture her in the dress; it would be another thing altogether to see her in the dress with a pair of pumps on. Maybe he was jumping the gun.

"So what dress are you wearing with those shoes?"

"Umm…the velvet one Brooke sent me," Peyton answered absently, not catching on to Lucas' perturbed body language.

He was definitely going to need a plan tomorrow night.

----

Three hours until he and Peyton were scheduled to arrive at the restaurant, and Lucas and Lily were on the road, heading to Haley and Nathan's apartment.

When they arrived, they were met with a gleeful salutation from both Nathan and Haley, who were waiting for Lucas and Lily by the door of their apartment. Nathan was excited to see his cousin and Haley was excited to hear about Lucas' "date" later that night.

"Haley there's nothing to tell. Peyton invited me to celebrate a grade on a project; she said nothing about a date. Plus there will be other people there from Peyton's art group."

"Okay so it'll be a double date."

"You're right Hales. It'll be a blind date with me and whatever that other girl's name is…Christy I think…while Peyton is busy being dazzled by Adam."

"You don't think that Peyton likes Adam do you?"

"Wait how do you know about Adam?"

"Brooke mentioned him."

"Peyton talks to Brooke about Adam?" Lucas said incredulously.

"I don't know to what capacity she talks about him, Brooke only mentioned that Adam was Peyton's classmate."

"Brooke didn't mention anything else?"

"I asked more about him but Brooke told me that she couldn't tell me anything more."

"What does that mean?"

"I guess it means that either Peyton hasn't told her much about him or that Peyton has told her a lot about him but Brooke just couldn't tell me because she knows that I talk to you."

"So basically Peyton is either enthralled with this guy or couldn't care less about him."

"That might be a little extreme," Haley laughed.

The color drained in Lucas' face, "Oh my God I just thought of something. What if Peyton is wearing that velvet dress for Adam?"

"Then that would suck," Haley stated the obvious, "unless you could get her out of the dress before she even sees Adam."

Lucas put a finger on his chin and gazed at the wall. "Have I ever told you how wise you are Haley?"

They both shot each other matching smirks.


	5. A Celebration

_**Chapter Four: A Celebration**_

Lucas arrived back home an hour later, the familiar aroma of perfume penetrating his nostrils and warming his body. He could really get used to coming home to that scent every day. He pretended for a second that Peyton was his betrothed and she was prepping for a highly anticipated romantic evening with him.

He headed towards his bedroom, or maybe it was their bedroom now, and caught a glimpse of Peyton in her robe slathering lotion on her legs. They were long and tanned, thanks to the rays of the summer sun, and they seemed a little fuller than they were he when admired them on the beach almost a month ago. She was going to give him a hernia in that dress.

She was busy trying to decide what hair style she should wear for their evening out. She wasn't pretending that this was a date because honestly, she didn't want to set herself up for disappointment.

"Oh hey Luke I didn't hear you come in. How do you think I should wear my hair tonight curly, wavy or straight?"

"Umm I'm sure you can't go wrong with any hair style," Lucas said truthfully. "I'm going to go jump in the shower."

Peyton stared in the mirror in the bedroom, fingering loose strands of her hair in an attempt to generate a favorable hair style choice. Lucas smiled at her as he walked out of the room and into the bathroom with his clothes in hand. He started the water and stripped off his clothes.

Peyton finally decided to wear her hair in loose curls but she couldn't find her curling iron. Suddenly she remembered she left it in the bathroom. She figured that since the water was running, Lucas must be in the shower and she could grab the curling iron from the bathroom cabinet without disrupting his shower.

She wasn't banking on seeing Lucas in all his naked glory, looking in the cabinet for a bottle of shampoo before he stepped into the shower. But that's what she saw.

"Oh my God," Peyton gasped and closed her eyes. "I'm sorry I just wanted to get my curling iron," Peyton blurted out quickly. "I'm so so sorry --"

"It's okay, it's okay," Lucas grabbed the curlers and put them in Peyton's hand. He could see Peyton's face turn a bright red color before he closed the door again.

She stood in the hallway and slowly opened her eyes. She closed them again and saw Lucas' penis. God help her.

By the time Lucas got out of the shower, Peyton was halfway done curling her hair. He had put on a wife beater and a pair of dark blue slacks, and from the mirror, she could see him pulling the shirt she bought him off of a hanger. Lucas put on the shirt and buttoned it up, leaving a couple buttons free at the top of the shirt. He walked over to the mirror and examined his appearance. They still had an hour left until they were scheduled to meet the rest of Peyton's group members. "I'll just wait in the living room until you finish getting ready."

"Okay. I won't be long though," Peyton said without looking at him. She was definitely still embarrassed. Lucas, however, was amused.

While he waited, he tried to work on a plan he would have to devise in an effort to keep coherency whenever Peyton appeared in that dress. He had some ideas but he was sure they would all fail.

Right on cue, Lucas heard the bedroom door open. He stood up as Peyton walked out, a sight for sore eyes, a vision of perfection even with minimal makeup and an absence of gaudy accessories. Her loose curls fell at her delightfully bare shoulders, cascading in front of sparkling green eyes that shone like emeralds. The dress hugged her body perfectly and the red pumps accentuated the dress and made her legs look even longer.

"You ready to go Lucas?" Peyton asked as she grabbed her black clutch purse.

"Uh yeah...I'm ready," Lucas stammered.

They decided to take Lucas' Mustang to the restaurant. The car ride was silent before Peyton felt compelled to thank Lucas again for coming out to celebrate with her.

"Don't mention it Peyton…I'd do anything for you." They locked eyes for a second before Peyton's phone rang. "Hello."

"Hey Peyton, are you guys on your way?"

"Yeah we'll be there in like 10 minutes."

"When you get here, just pull up to the front and tell the valet parking attendant that you're Peyton Sawyer and you're with Adam Anderson. Once you get in, the matradee will escort you and Lucas to our table."

"Well aren't you Mr. Bigshot?" Peyton spat facetiously.

"Yeah that's me Mr. Pretentious," Adam answered.

"I'm just kidding Adam, thanks a lot. We'll see you soon."

Adam hung up the phone and looked over at Chelsea, who was smiling at Adam's obvious crush on Peyton. Adam and Chelsea were pretty good friends and Chelsea was definitely someone that Adam confided in when needing to talk about his feelings for Peyton. Chelsea was a really good listener and although she didn't have much of a friendship with Peyton, she could see why Adam liked her.

Adam was a pretty good listener as well and he'd heard Chelsea complain many times about her lack of luck in the romance department. He was sure that Chelsea would probably like Lucas, or at least be attracted to him since she had a thing for blonde guys. He was glad that Peyton was bringing him. Maybe this could turn into a double date of sorts.

Peyton's verification that Lucas was just her friend was probably the best thing he'd heard in a long time. However, if and when Peyton became his girlfriend, he'd definitely have somewhat of a problem with a guy being her roommate. Maybe I'm jumping the gun, Adam thought. Then again, Peyton had certainly given him some engaging looks and some flirtatious comments. It couldn't hurt to dream a little.

Lucas and Peyton arrived exactly ten minutes later, walking side by side into the ritzy restaurant until they saw Adam and Chelsea. Peyton looked at Lucas and she could tell that he was inwardly scoffing at how extravagant the restaurant was, as well as the occupants in it. Lucas looked at Adam and wondered how long he stood in the mirror to get his hair like that.

Adam spotted them across the restaurant and almost crapped himself when he saw Peyton in that dress.

"Hey guys!" Peyton hugged both Adam and Chelsea before Lucas shook Adam's hand.

"Lucas this is Chelsea, and Chelsea this is Lucas," Peyton introduced them. "Nice to meet you Lucas," Chelsea said politely. Damn he was hot. Lucas pulled the chair out for Peyton and they sat down next to each other across the table from Chelsea and Adam.

"Nice to meet you as well."

Chelsea and Adam already ordered drinks for themselves causing Peyton to ask how they got the restaurant to serve them liquor.

"It's my dad's restaurant and he doesn't care if I drink," Adam shrugged. "Do you guys want something to drink?"

"No thanks," Lucas refused, "I'm the designated driver."

"How about you Peyton?"

"No thank you."

The four of them settled in and ordered their food amidst a healthy dose of conversation. Everyone contributed to the conversation, even Lucas and Chelsea struck up a side conversation about American literature versus British Literature, while Adam allowed his gaze to linger slightly longer in Peyton's direction. Lucas noticed all of Adam's advances, one of them being a very blatant grab of her hand and another of them being an offhanded flirtatious comment.

Peyton suddenly felt uncomfortable and found a blessing in disguise when she spotted a classmate in her art history class. "Oh there's a friend of mine, will you excuse me?" Peyton got up from the table.

She mumbled, "You gonna be alright?" to Lucas and he nodded reassuringly, even though he wanted to beat Adam's ass.

Peyton walked over to her friend and they conversed briefly. Adam excused himself from the table, trying to take the opportunity to have a word with Peyton away from the other table inhabitants. As Peyton walked back to the table after talking with her friend, she heard someone whispering her name over by the bathrooms. It was Adam. Jesus.

"Hey Peyton can I have a word?"

"Umm sure," Peyton's body language conveyed uncomfortable at best.

Adam seemed unsure of how to word what he wanted to say. "So…I just want to know if we're…on the same page about…each other."

"What are you talking about?" Peyton asked plainly.

Adam let out a breath, "I like you Peyton and I was kind of treating tonight as a date. We've flirted a little bit in the past and I guess I wanted to know if you felt the same way."

Peyton was nearly floored by how audacious he was being. The problem was that she didn't see him that way at all. She never remembered flirting with him. She thought about how awkward it would be between them from then on out. They had to work with each other on future art projects. Why oh why was this happening?

"Adam you're a nice guy but…I'm….with Lucas," she drawled out.

What had she done? She might have wanted Lucas, but they were surely not a couple.

"I thought –"

"We just made it official yesterday," Peyton interrupted. She suddenly became aware that, other than Lucas pulling out her chair and her picking some lent off his shirt, she and Lucas hadn't been acting like a convincing couple in the first 20 minutes of the dinner.

"Oh."

"I'm sorry if you ---"

Adam stood with his mouth slightly open and a look of skepticism on his face.

"If you'll excuse me, I have to use the restroom," Peyton hurried off. Adam was left to wonder what just happened.

Peyton went into a bathroom stall and took a second to compose herself after realizing that she made a stupid mistake. How would she get Lucas to buy into this? But he did say earlier that he would do anything for her. She was about to test the validity of that statement. She pulled out her cell phone and sent Lucas a text message asking him to pretend to be her boyfriend for the night.

When Lucas got the text, he couldn't say that he was disappointed. He immediately recognized that it was because of Adam that he had to pretend to be Peyton's boyfriend. He should have known that Adam excused himself for a reason. He better not have forced himself on her. Adam might've seemed like a nice guy, but Lucas wasn't that naïve. Peyton was wearing the hell out of that dress and he noticed Adam looking at Peyton like a dog in heat a couple of times.

When Peyton came back from the bathroom, she and Lucas shared a look affirming their newly formed couple status. Lucas got up and immediately pulled Peyton's chair out for her. "You were gone quite a while, I missed you Peyt," Lucas said whilst looking in her eyes. One night to be her boyfriend…he was definitely going to milk this.

Peyton grabbed his hand and gave him a sultry smile. One night to be his girlfriend…she was definitely going to milk this.

Shortly after, their food arrived to the table and the dialogue picked up again. Adam ordered a few more drinks, determined to use alcohol to blanket his embarrassment. He wound up turning into a garrulous, meddlesome instigator, determined to find out what the "basis" of their relationship was and how they realized their "undying love" for each other. Chelsea felt terrible for Adam, he was undoubtedly making a spectacle of himself, but Chelsea also knew that Adam brought it on himself for making assumptions and putting his heart on his sleeve.

"….we hid out in the library and Peyton kissed me and told me she loved me. I mean it wasn't supposed to be romantic, but we've always had a connection, whether we were dating or not. It's always been there," Lucas explained. "So does that answer your question Adam?"

"I guess so," he bit back petulantly.

Peyton sat back and let Lucas' words sink in. They sounded sincere, but Peyton couldn't tell if it was part of the act or if he really meant it. She smiled at him, a soft loving smile that expressed how pleased she was, and he grabbed her hand and brought it to his mouth for a kiss.

Adam had enough.

"So I was thinking that we end the night here instead of going to the club," Chelsea stated after the waiter grabbed their empty plates. "Adam probably needs to get some sleep. I'll take him home."

"I'm perfect," Adam slurred. "I want to go to the club and find the love of my life the way Lucas has."

Peyton ignored Adam's sullen behavior. "I think you're right Chelsea, I'm not too eager to go to a club anyway," Peyton affirmed. "What about you Luke?"

"I'm ready to go home babe." Peyton smiled at him, enjoying the hell out of that endearment.

"I'll see you guys on Monday."

And with that, the "couple" was gone.

----

Lucas and Peyton arrived home at around 11:30 pm. The car ride was quiet, but intense; the air seemed charged with questions and unspoken sentiments of quiet affection. When they arrived home Lucas pulled out his cell phone and began to dial Haley's number to check on Lily. He'd already called during dinner when Peyton was at the bathroom, but he couldn't help but worry about her even though he trusted Haley and Nathan. Before he could dial, Peyton grabbed the phone and told him not to bother the new mom at such a late hour.

Their hands touched and they both felt a wave of pleasure course through their bodies. "I think I'm going to take advantage of a baby-less house and do something I can't do very often at 11:30 at night."

"And what's that?"

"Play some music," Peyton answered as she walked over toward her vinyl collection.

Lucas smiled, "Play something good."

She pulled out an album and noticed that it wasn't as dusty as it was when she moved in. "You dusted my collection?" Peyton asked with a hint of appreciation in her tone.

"Yes. Those records are probably the most important things that you have, so they should at least be clean."

"Thank you Lucas." She turned and faced him. "And thanks for being my pretend boyfriend tonight. I kind of sprung it on you and I'm sorry for that."

"Don't be sorry Peyt. Tonight has been really fun."

"Yeah but it's over now, right?" She wasn't sure whether she meant that as a statement or a question.

"I don't think so," Lucas disagreed, moving closer to her and grabbing his phone from her hand. "I distinctly remember you texting me, asking me to be your pretend boyfriend for the _rest_ of the night."

Peyton swallowed loudly as he moved closer. She could feel her heart beating in her throat.

"We still have thirty minutes to go," Lucas whispered.

Without wasting another second, he dropped his phone, swept her in his arms and kissed her with fervor.


	6. 4th of July

**Okay this chapter is kind of a filler chapter but I needed some fluff before the drama picks up next chapter. Hope you enjoy.**

_**Chapter Five: 4**__**th**__** of July**_

It was about 11:42 pm when Lucas and Peyton stumbled onto the couch and continued their extended make-out session. After Lucas took the initiative and capitalized on his temporary status as her boyfriend, they spent the next ten minutes searching each other's mouths with their tongues and exploring each other's bodies with their hands. They knocked over a bunch of Peyton's records and a couple of unlit candles while hastily moving against each other.

While on the couch, Lucas threw his head back and concentrated on the way Peyton was working his neck with her lips and her tongue. She couldn't get enough of his body, her hands traveling up and down his torso, her fingers pulling at the tawny, fine wisps of his hair in an attempt to keep herself somewhat grounded in her own arousal.

Lucas' hands weren't nearly as active, he was definitely more conscious of the fact that they had some talking to do before any fireworks exploded in his living room or bedroom. Even though Peyton was doing some great things to him, he couldn't stop the questions from forming in his brain. What were they? Is this simply a one-time ordeal? Does Peyton want something more? Would they be able to co-exist together under one roof without being overpowered by their unbridled passion for each other?

Peyton was thinking of nothing else but being with Lucas. Brooke was right about her wanting affection, but she was wrong about her wanting it from anyone other than Lucas. In however long they had been making out, she felt more alive and complete than she had in a long time. The way his lips felt moving against hers, the way his chest moved up and down in rhythm with her active hands and the way he blew out a breath when she shifted against him. She was about to take her exploration further when she heard him murmur something…

"It's midnight," he breathed out. Peyton stopped her movements.

"You want to stop?!" she said in disbelief.

"I don't want to…." Lucas answered, "but…"

"We need to talk," Peyton finished.

"Yeah."

"So," Lucas began, "I need to know what you want us to be. I need to know what this is."

"You kissed me," Peyton pointed out. "I just thought I was getting some action from my fake boyfriend for the night," Peyton laughed.

Her joke went completely over his head, causing his face to slightly contort into a hurt expression at her admission.

"Oh Luke I was joking sweetie. I was just joking, I'm sorry." She reached up and touched his face, guiding him to look at her. "You know this means more to me than that. I've waited so long for _us_."

"Really?" Lucas looked surprised.

"Yeah," Peyton said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Honestly the ball is in your court Luke."

A moment of silence passed between them. Peyton tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and moved closer to him.

"So did you mean it?" she asked.

"Mean what?"

"What you said about us at dinner…when you told Adam about us in the library."

"I meant every word," Lucas confirmed, reaching out to cup her cheek. They inched towards each other, pausing slightly before tenderly pressing their lips together for a sweet, languorous kiss.

"So does this mean that we're…_together_?" Peyton asked.

Lucas paused and moved his head to the side, a hesitant gesture that Peyton immediately caught on to.

"Lucas don't do this," Peyton sighed annoyingly.

"Do what?"

"Don't come this far only to back out. I mean know you're afraid—"

"Whoa whoa I'm not backing out," Lucas said firmly. "I just…I _really_ want this to work and I want you to be happy Peyt," Lucas smiled widely.

Peyton mirrored his smile and grabbed his hand, sandwiching it between her smooth palms.

"But most of all, I want there to be nothing between us: no secrets, no holding back."

Peyton's euphoria suddenly took a nosedive. She was already withholding information from him, information that if known, might have drastically changed how things turned out. She couldn't escape the guilt regardless of how well-intentioned her lie about not getting the internship was.

"What's wrong?"

Peyton snapped out of her reverie, "Nothing, I'm just wondering why we're still talking," she said huskily, leaning over to kiss him again. He leaned towards her, meeting the kiss and threading his fingers through her hair. "You look so beautiful tonight," Lucas breathed out, pulling away from the kiss. "I felt like the luckiest guy in that restaurant."

Peyton blushed at the compliment and gave Lucas a "thank you, but you know I can't take compliments" look. He loved how modest she was. "That's sweet Lucas, thank you."

Her meek facial expression morphed into an anticipatory grin, "Or maybe you're just saying that because you want to get under this dress?"

"Peyt you—"

"I wore it for you, just so you know," Peyton began to play with the buttons on his shirt.

Lucas chuckled to himself, remembering his previous paranoia when he thought Peyton might have worn it for Adam.

"What's funny?"

"It's nothing…it's just…when I went over to Haley's earlier, I talked her ears off about the possibility of you wearing that dress for…Adam."

Peyton's eyebrows raised an inch higher.

"So what exactly happened with that anyway? Were you guys ever…?"

"No," Peyton said quickly. "He really surprised me tonight. I had no idea of his feelings for me, and I was never interested in him in the least bit. I just think he's a really talented artist and sometimes I tease him because he's so brilliant. Other than that…" Peyton shrugged.

"I can't believe you ranted to Haley about it," she laughed.

"It seemed reasonable then, but completely silly now. Haley even suggested that I try to sabotage you wearing that dress for Adam by trying to get you out of the dress before we left the house. I thought about it and decided that I wouldn't seduce you," Lucas said with feigned arrogance.

"I'm not so sure about that Mr. _I'm conveniently naked on the other side of the shower curtain when Peyton comes to get her curlers_."

"Yeah because I totally knew you were going to come at that particular second," he uttered facetiously. "I'm just glad I was wrong about you and Adam."

"I'm just glad you didn't try to seduce me or we would have never made it to dinner."

Lucas' breath hitched in his throat.

"Well I'm ready for bed," Peyton stood up and stretched her arms. "You coming?"

"Peyton I think we should sleep in separate rooms now that we're together."

"Why? You can't keep your hands to yourself?" Peyton questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"No that's not it….we just started dating Peyton. Most people normally go on a date of some sort before they're sleeping in the same bed," he laughed.

"I think the simple fact that we're living together and raising a baby at 18 eliminates any potential for normalcy."

_They _were raising a baby. Normally it would frighten him to hear her make such a statement, but now…not so much. He was done fighting the inevitable. He didn't know how much he believed in fate and destiny but Peyton's assimilation into he and Lily's life by way of an improbable reneged internship offer, is difficult to ignore.

"But I see what you mean," Peyton admitted. "We're definitely going to have to work out the whole first date thing. I'll see you in the morning." She kissed him on the cheek.

"Goodnight Peyton."

---

Peyton slept in until around 11 a.m. Lucas, however, was up at 8:30 picking up supplies and setting things up for a "date" he was planning for Peyton. He talked to Haley briefly on his way home and told her he was coming to get Lily shortly. He also told her that he had a surprise for her, and much to her dismay, he told her couldn't reveal the surprise until he saw her.

He hung up the phone and ventured into the bedroom. Peyton was asleep, her once wavy hair looked as though a cyclone hit it and the comforter was strewn across the bed, exposing the tighty wighties she was wearing. Lucas walked over and sat on the bed, kissing her lightly on the cheek before brushing her hair out of her face. Her eyes fluttered open, meeting smiling blue ones and she felt as if the first day of the rest of her life was beginning.

They left the house 45 minutes later in the Comet to pick up Lily. As they walked up the stairs to Nathan and Haley's apartment, they could hear Lily wailing from inside of the apartment. Lucas watched as Peyton's face formed into grimace. "You should have told Haley to put on a Cure album and hold Lily close to the left side of her chest while rubbing her back. That stops her from crying when nothing else works," Peyton stated.

Lucas looked at her in disbelief and shook his head. "Only you," he laughed. Lucas knocked on the door and Haley opened it a few seconds later with a squealing, squirming Lily in her arms. "Hi guys," she forced out, her voice slightly weary.

"Hey Haley," they chimed before they simultaneously reached out to relieve Haley of Lily. Peyton slapped Lucas' hands away playfully and scooped Lily from Haley's arms, causing Lucas to stick his tongue out at her and call her a baby hog.

"Thanks so much for watching Lils," Peyton said appreciatively, not bothering to take her eyes off a visibly calmer Lily.

"No problem. I think she missed you guys, but she didn't cry that much."

Actually she did, but Haley didn't want to talk about that, she wanted to hear about Lucas' surprise. "So what's the surprise Luke?" She nudged him in the side and followed Lucas as he walked towards the balcony.

"The surprise is tall, blonde, beautiful and…clumsy," Lucas laughed as Peyton tripped (but didn't fall) over one of Jamie's toys. Haley's face morphed into one of jubilance and glee. She smiled widely at Lucas and hugged him tightly. "I'm so happy for you."

"What are you guys talking about?" Peyton's eyes narrowed at them from across the room.

"Everything," Lucas answered with a boyish smile. "I just told Haley that I'm no longer a single man."

"You and that whore from the pier are together now?!?" Peyton teased.

"Oooh she was cute," Lucas said in mock seriousness. Peyton threw Jamie's stuffed animal at him.

Nathan came out of the bathroom and spotted the two guests, "well well, what do we have here?"

"We have a brand new couple," Haley answered. Peyton's face went red.

"It's about time man," Nathan patted Lucas on the back. "So today is the 4th of July. Does the new couple have any plans?"

"Not really," Peyton shrugged.

"Not so fast," Lucas countered. "You might not know of any plans, but that doesn't mean we don't have any."

Peyton's raised her eyebrows, "You planned something that quickly?"

Lucas nodded, not bothering to give any more details.

"Can I get a hint?" Peyton implored.

"I don't know," he looked at Haley as though he was considering giving Peyton a hint. "Okay I'll give you a hint," Lucas gave in. Peyton's eyes lit up in anticipation.

"Just think of last year's 4th of July," he told her. "And that's all I'm giving you."

"Wait what did you guys do last year?" Nathan asked.

Peyton grinned. "Last year we spent the whole day together since we were really the only ones in Tree Hill. We woke up around noon on the 4th of July after Lucas stayed at my house the night before, and since we were both feeling kind of festive, we grabbed some red, white and blue cans of paint from my room and decided to paint each other's bodies and head to the beach."

"You painted each other?" Haley looked confused. "Why?"

"We were bored," she laughed. "We agreed that the other person could paint whatever they wanted and we blind folded each other so we couldn't see what the other person painted," Peyton smiled.

"What did you guys paint?" Nathan seemed amused at the trip down memory lane for Lucas and Peyton.

"I painted the words: _Sir-Squint-A-Lot_ on his back in red and I also painted: _Peyton Sawyer is smarter than me_ on his chest and stomach in blue," Peyton gave a wide smile.

"I painted _Chickeny _on both of her legs in red and I painted _Single White Female _on her stomach in white," Lucas gave a wry smile.

Haley laughed, "What else did you do?"

"Well it was really hot outside so Lucas and I walked around Tree Hill minus our shirts," she continued, "although I had a bikini top on," Peyton felt compelled to say at Nathan's questioning glance. "We walked to the beach and laughed at people laughing at us," she smiled when Lucas chuckled at the memory. "Then we ended the night by having a little barbeque on the rivercourt. We brought my dad's barbeque pit, some coal, some hot dogs and chicken, and watched the fireworks until we got tired."

"That sounds really…"

"Romantic," Haley filled in the blank for Nathan. "One can only imagine what you have planned tonight."

"I'm sure whatever it is, I'll love it," Peyton looked dreamily at Lucas.

---

After they left Nathan and Haley's, Lucas picked up some flowers and drove to the cemetery. He hadn't visited his mother since she passed. He wanted to, but there was something about seeing his mother's name on a headstone that made everything so surreal.

To the average person, a visit to the cemetery was probably a strange destination for the commencement of a date. But Lucas knew that Peyton was a bit slighted by the fact that he hadn't opened up to her about his mom, so he wanted to share something as important as his first visit to Karen's grave with her. He knew she would love this more than some typical first-date outing.

The first stop on the trail was Keith's grave. Peyton stood a couple steps behind Lucas and he held Lily and talked to Keith about how great his daughter was. The next stop was Anna's grave. Peyton asked Lucas for a moment as she stood by her mother's grave and spoke to the small grey rock. He gazed at her, Peyton's eyes glossing over, her hands clasping together, her knees bending to level with the headstone. So lost was he in his gaze that he barely noticed Peyton's arm motioning for them to come and stand with her.

Lucas walked over and placed some flowers near Anna's headstone.

"So this is Lucas, the guy I've been telling you about. And look what he's done he's got me smiling. Can you believe it?"

"Mrs. Sawyer you have an amazing daughter. God knows she's been the best thing to ever happen to me. Or should I say _us_," Lucas looked down at Lily and put his ear towards her mouth. "Oh and Lily wanted me to thank you for adopting Peyton because if you hadn't adopted her, than Peyton and I never would have met, and if we didn't meet, Peyton wouldn't be around to make funny faces at her."

Peyton smiled at how gregarious Lucas was being. She grabbed his hand, and entwined their fingers. She didn't say the words "I love you", but he sure felt it. They stood there in silence for a few more minutes before Peyton turned to walk to the Comet.

"Umm how about we make one more stop?" Lucas asked. Peyton had it in her head that Lucas didn't want to visit his mom. She knew that the pain from losing his mother was still raw and very difficult for Lucas to process. She knew that feeling all too well.

"I want you to come with me to visit my mom."

"Really?"

"Why do you not want to go?"

"No I just didn't know you were ready."

"I honestly don't know how ready I am, I just…I just know that I want to share this with you."

Peyton spent the next half hour listening to Lucas spill his heart out to his mother's headstone and to her. There were ample tears to go around; Lucas, Lily and Peyton had all shed them. Peyton's heart broke for Lucas and soared at the same time. He had let her completely in, told her about how afraid he was for Lily and how he, at one point, was unfairly angry at his mom for leaving him with such a huge responsibility. She gave Lucas every bit of her attention before thanking Karen for the man that she raised Lucas to be. They left the cemetery shortly after that.

Lucas drove back to the house and told Peyton to wait in the car with Lily. He came back out with a picnic basket, a couple of blankets and a shoebox. Without speaking he placed the items in the backseat next to Lily's car seat and got back in the driver's seat.

"What's in the box?" Peyton peered over her shoulder.

"You'll see," he gave her a wink.

The sun was starting to set and Lucas smiled to himself at how perfectly everything was going. He pulled the Comet onto the grass beside rivercourt and helped Peyton and Lily out of the car. As Peyton stepped closer to the court she could see a message painted on the court in red, white and blue paint. It read: _Peyton, you make me so happy and I am lucky to have you in my life. I love you ~ Lucas._

"I know this is sudden," Lucas said quickly, "and we've only been dating for like 20 hours, but this has been on my heart for quite awhile now. You don't have to say you love me back."

"Okay," Peyton chirped and shrugged her shoulders.

"Although anything you have to say will certainly be welcome," Lucas added.

Peyton laughed at his passive-aggressiveness. "Of course I love you Lucas. I have for as long as I can remember. These last 20 hours have just been the perfect culmination to a long period of confusion, longing and regret."

Lucas' face saddened at the thought of how she'd waited for this. "But it was worth it," she added.

He touched Peyton's arm and kissed her forehead. Lucas spread the blanket out on the court and opened the picnic basket, revealing turkey sandwiches, chips, fruit, yogurt, bottled water and baby bottles. The fireworks started to blanket the sky, shooting in all directions over the water. Lily screamed a high pitched squeal that startled Lucas, making him accidently splash yogurt on his face. Peyton took her spoon and trailed it along his face, scrapping up the excess yogurt and brought it to her mouth. "I hope your face is clean," Peyton mumbled before Lucas threw a chip at her.

After they finished their meal and Lily had fallen asleep in her car seat, Lucas picked up the shoe box and placed it in front of Peyton. "For me?" Lucas nodded. "Wow the engagement ring must be so big that you needed a shoebox instead of a regular ring box," Peyton smirked.

"Just open it."

Peyton opened the box and saw lots of pictures and mementos from their relationship. There was a picture of them in the Comet smiling and enjoying each other. There was a note from her to him written in Spanglish. There were clippings from the comic strip she'd done with Thud magazine and a hotel receipt.

"Is this from when we drove down to see if my dad was dead and ended up staying in that hotel?"

"Yeah. I know it's creepy but I saved the receipt. And underneath that picture is the _P.S whatever_ mix you made me," Lucas looked in the box with Peyton.

"Aww you saved that mix. I was so flirting with you when I gave it to you."

"I know," Lucas agreed. "Other girls flirt by batting their eyelashes and buying new outfits, Peyton Sawyer makes mix cds."

"You know you loved it."

"There's nothing sexier than a mix tape."

"Ooh this picture is from 4th of July last summer. This was when that guy snapped a picture of us on the beach."

"We looked so goofy with that crap painted on us."

"Speak for yourself…I got three phone numbers that day. I should go shirtless more often."

"Nothing wrong with going shirtless," she agreed.

"So…I think this is my new favorite holiday," he said before kissing her softly.

Peyton laughed and told him he was cheesy.

"Although it would be a totally different story had you gotten that internship. You'd be in LA with Brooke and her men, going to chic parties with themes, schmoozing with celebrities and their publicists, drinking fancy champagne. There might not have been a you and me," Lucas mumbled the last part.

Peyton stayed silent, staring at the fireworks instead of looking at Lucas. He felt her stare drift away from him and felt compelled to continue talking.

"I really wanted you to have that internship, but I can't help but feel relieved that you're here." He grabbed her hand. "I can't help but think that this was fate."

Peyton finally looked him in the eyes. Lucas smiled, "I promise, that's the last cheesy comment I'll make tonight."

They sat in silence for a few minutes.

"The fireworks stopped," Lucas observed, sliding his arms around Peyton's waist, nuzzling her temple.

"I wonder if that's the last of them," Peyton mumbled.

The fireworks were far from over.


	7. Stuck In a Moment You Can't Get Out Of

**Warning: This chapter is a little smutty but nothing too bad ;) **

_**Chapter Six: Stuck In a Moment You Can't Get Out Of**_

Tactile, sensuous sensations rushing through her body, encompassing her in a pleasure laden rapture…a place where she could feel utterly free and devoid of all her mistakes, all the terrible things that plagued her and prevented her from taking risks and living her life to the fullest. A place where she could close her eyes and see stars, touch her dreams, fulfill all of her fantasies and meticulously create voluptuous new ones. A place where she could open her eyes and see her indrawn abdomen sheathed beneath his sinuous, supple lips, puckered and heading southbound toward her hips on which he would kiss the crenulated imprint left by the band of her discarded shorts.

His body was lukewarm, his silhouette sliding beneath the sheets in the shadowy room as he skimmed the dip in the small of her back with his anxious fingers, fingers that had already reached the depths of her body, eliciting breathy moans and stretching her muscles. She lifted her head to kiss him, almost ferociously, and he returned the kiss with alacrity, the passion overtaking them both.

He entered her slowly and vigilantly. The heat was unbearable, sweltering, causing Peyton to throw her head back on the pillow and temporarily lose control of the movement of her eyeballs.

"Peyton I love you so much," he whimpered. He had turned her over on the bed and placed whisper soft kisses all along the smooth skin of her back, making her shiver in ecstasy and reach behind her for any part of his body. He avoided her hands, instead grabbing her hips and lifting them until her knees impaled into the mattress, her hands similarly followed suit, creating a foundation necessary for him to fill her body an angle that would allow her to stifle her screams in the pillows lest she wake a sleeping Lily. She could feel his breath on her back as he hovered over her and whispered…..

"Good morning Peyton."

She seemed to have been completely sated as he hovered over her in his cotton tee-shirt and greeted her. Her abrupt movements signified that he had indeed awakened her, although her prior movements suggested that she was already awake. "Oh I'm sorry Peyt, I thought you were up."

"Mhmm…" Peyton looked at Lucas with confusion and slowly forming embarrassment. Oh God, she thought. She had dreamt of being in the throes of passion with her boyfriend, who was now occupying his bed by mutual agreement, but had yet to occupy…her, by a somewhat mutual agreement.

Lucas wanted to wait a while until they were ready to take that next step and outwardly Peyton agreed with him. Inwardly, she was wondering how long she could take the physical push and pull climate that a lack of intimacy would surely create.

But they were both mature and they decided that they would sleep in the same bed and be affectionate with one another in spite of their agreement to wait. "Good morning Lucas," Peyton murmured, wiping off some obstinate sweat that had clung to her brow. She leaned over and kissed him chastely on the cheek before rushing out of the room and into the bathroom.

A confused Lucas lay back down on the bed wondering what just happened. He sprawled his arms out on the bed, rolled over to Peyton's side of the bed and what the hell…Were the sheets wet?!

----

Peyton stepped out of the bathroom, clean and fully dressed in jeans and a tank top, smelling good, hair brushed and libido completely under control. She strolled up to Lucas, who was taking bagels out of the toaster, and wrapped her arms around him. She leaned up to her tip toes and blew a very wet, slobbery kiss into the back of his neck before laughing mirthfully and turning to escape Lucas' grasp. She couldn't escape him though, he grabbed her from behind and buried his face in her neck, "did you really think you were going to get away that?"

"What are you going to do, spank me?" Peyton asked naughtily.

Lucas increased his already tight grip on her body, "I thought we said we would tone down all the sexual innuendos until we get past second base?"

"Yeah we'll talk about that once you finish pressing my ass into the front of your jeans," Peyton countered.

"Good point," Lucas released his hold on her and turned her around. "You didn't kiss me good morning."

"Yes I did."

"A two second brotherly kiss on the cheek does not count," he corrected. "I believe my tongue has your name on it."

"Ewww," Peyton giggled before opening her mouth and letting him kiss her passionately. His back hit the kitchen counter and that's when Lily started crying from the nursery.

Lucas reluctantly pulled away from her and sighed, "I've got her."

Peyton smiled and grabbed a bagel and some cream cheese. She poured a glass of orange juice and sat down at the table. Lucas came out of the nursery with a cranky and smelly Lily. He changed her in the bathroom and came out in time to see Peyton getting her bag ready for class. "So I'll see you for lunch," Lucas confirmed.

"Of course," Peyton kissed him softly. "I'll be out of class like ten minutes later than usual because I have to talk with Chelsea and Adam, but I'll meet you out in the parking lot."

"Is everything okay with you and Adam?"

"No. He's still bitter and quite frankly it's making it difficult to work with him," she blew out a breath.

"I'm sorry Peyton. I hate that you have to feel uncomfortable," he rubbed the sides of her arms. "You'll tell me if he does anything out of line right?"

"Lucas—"

"I won't get angry or do anything stupid, but I'm not going to let him disrespect you or our relationship."

Peyton nodded, "I'll see you later." She kissed Lily's forehead and walked out of the door.

----

Larry Sawyer wasn't the best father, but there was no question that he cared about Peyton regardless of how far away he was. He arrived in Tree Hill for a few days or more to finalize the sell of his house and to surprise Peyton. He had planned on going to LA to visit her but since she wasn't going and he hadn't seen her in three months, he figured that a trip back home was far overdue.

He pulled up to his old house and saw the renovators outside of the house making finishing touches to the house before the new occupants moved in. Larry agreed to make some renovations prior to selling the house as part of the deal with the new owner.

Larry walked up to the men and introduced himself. They talked for a little while about the work that was being done, a continuation of the conversation Larry had with one of them over the phone. They informed him that this was their last day of work and that the renovations will be done by late afternoon. As Larry was leaving one of the men called out his name, "I forgot to give you this Mr. Sawyer."

It was a couple pieces of mail address to Peyton, she had yet to forward her mail to Lucas address. "Oh thank you," Larry grabbed the mail and got in his car. One of the letters looked to be junk mail from a credit card company. The other piece of mail was from Sire Records. He immediately remembered that it was the name of the label that reneged on the internship they offered Peyton.

Larry was extremely disappointed when Peyton told him the news. He thought it was a great opportunity for Peyton to do something she loved and to turn it into a career. He wasn't one of those parents that felt that college was the only option to being successful in life. It wasn't for everyone and quite frankly he was in love with his job despite ever setting foot in a college classroom.

So when he saw the letter from Sire Records, he was so excited at the prospect of Sire offering Peyton another internship, that he opened the letter himself. He was stunned when he read what was on the piece of paper in front of him.

----

Peyton come home at 3:00 directly after her last class and found Lucas sitting on the couch burping Lily over his shoulder.

"Hi."

"Hey how was class today?"

"Terrible."

"Aww I'm sorry Peyt. What happened?"

"Adam was being a dick and refused to meet with the group to work on our latest group project _as a group_. He was completely cooperative before that dinner. I knew this would turn out terribly," Peyton pouted.

"Maybe it won't," Lucas said. "You said Adam is a brilliant artist and you're not so bad," he smirked, "I'm sure that you guys can still do a great job on the project individually."

"Since when did you become such an optimist?" Peyton started to play with the charm on the necklace he was wearing.

"Umm a week and a half ago when we started dating. I know we've had a history of being dark and desolate, but it's kind of nice to be able be to see the good in things," he mused. "My mom once told me to see the magic in the world. I see it every time I look at this little girl and every time I look at you," Lucas said earnestly. He touched her chin and looked directly into her eyes.

"You saying things like that is what's making it hard for me to respect the arrangement we have."

"Really? I thought it was my biceps."

"Actually you're kind of on the scrawny side these days." Lucas looked away from Peyton's gaze as though he had been caught. "But I get it. When Ellie died I lost some weight too, but you can't let grief overcome you…you have to eat more Lucas," she stressed.

After some awkward silence she continued, "At least you're not letting someone like Rachael get you drunk to cope with the pain."

"It helps that I'm a lot luckier than you were. I have you and Lily for support…you didn't have anyone. I should have been there for you regardless of how hard you were working to convince me that you were okay."

"Lucas you helped me more than anyone." She paused and examined Lucas face. "You really have no idea how long I've loved you before this, do you?"

"I guess not," he admitted. "But looking back on everything that we've been through, it's easier for me to see how much you loved me. It's just that while those moments were taking place, I forced myself to see you the way I thought you saw me…as a friend."

"Sometimes I can't believe we've denied ourselves _this _for so long." Peyton looked at him for a moment, searching his eyes for any sign of apprehension or fear. A minute later she finally spoke, "I don't want to wait anymore Lucas."

"You mean you don't want to wait to have sex?"

"Sort of. With Nathan it was sex. With Jake it was sex. I know this sounds completely cheesy, and I promise you that I didn't get what I'm about to say off of an after school special, but…I've always wanted more than that and I know it's going to be that way with you. Honestly it feels like we're playing house right now…it felt that way when Jake and Jenny stayed at my house… temporary and juvenile, you know. But with you, I'm always thinking about you and I in the future and seeing Lily grow up. I just want that future to start now."

Lucas felt some pangs of guilt when Peyton began talking about the future. He pulled her close so that both she and Lily were lying on his chest. "I agree with you but…"

"But?" Peyton echoed.

"I don't think we should plan our first time. It should just happen, you know."

"It will," she whispered, "it will."

They sat on the couch for a few more minutes, their hands leisurely skimming over each other's bodies, their minds racing with undeveloped ideas. They sat that way until Peyton's phone rang. It was her dad.

"Hey dad."

"Hi honey, where are you?" His voice was coarse and he spoke quickly.

"I'm at Lucas' house. Why…what's wrong?"

"I'm in Tree Hill," he said.

Peyton froze. She had yet to tell her father that she was living with Lucas. In fact she lied and said that she had her own apartment. Her father certainly didn't approve of her living with Lucas while he was giving her enough money for school, an apartment and money for books so she wouldn't have to work.

"Oh what a surprise," Peyton said, her voice wavering.

"Where's your apartment Peyton, I want to stay for a couple of days if that's okay with you?"

"Umm just come to Lucas' and we can talk okay?"

"Yeah there's a lot we need to talk about," he agreed. "I'll see you in five minutes."

Peyton hung up the phone, "My dad is in town and he's on his way over here." Peyton looked at Lucas as though she had seen a ghost that scared the crap of her.

"Why do you look like you're afraid to see your own dad?"

Peyton stared into space and stood up, idly picking up little trinkets throughout the living room, nervously shuffling around. "Peyton?" Lucas tried to get her attention.

"I haven't quite told my dad that I'm staying here," she mumbled.

Lucas sighed loudly and placed his hands on top of his hand. "Peyton," he sighed, "Why not?"

"Because when I told him that I wanted to stay here, he said he didn't want me staying with a boy," she stated.

Lucas felt slighted at the idea of him being just "a boy" to her father. He always thought that Larry liked him, and he always thought of himself as more than just a boy in Peyton's life. Lucas was prepared to defend his relationship with Peyton at all costs, and he certainly wasn't going to allow Larry, who hadn't really been in Peyton's life anyway, to intimidate him. But he was curious as to why Peyton outright defied her father in order to stay with him.

"So why didn't you get an apartment or something?"

"Because I'm old enough to make my own decisions," she said unapologetically. Honestly it's kind of comical that he picks and chooses when he wants to play the father role and prevent me from shacking up with a boy."

Just as Lucas was about to respond, the doorbell rang.

He walked to the door and opened it, finding Larry standing in the doorway, a scowl plastered on his face before attempting a synthetic smile in Lucas' direction.

"It's good to see you Mr. Sawyer," Lucas extended his hand.

"You too," Larry shook his hand.

Peyton got up from her seat on the couch, and gave Lily back to Lucas before walking up to her father and wrapping her arms around Larry's broad shoulders. "Hi dad."

"Hi honey…I missed you," he gave Peyton a firm squeeze before pulling back to scan her face.

"I've missed you too."

Larry glanced at Lily cradled in Lucas' arms, "Your sister is really beautiful Lucas, just like her mother."

"Thank you."

They all walked over to the couch and had a seat. "I am so sorry for your loss. I wanted to be here for the funeral but—"

"I wasn't expecting you to come," Lucas interrupted. There was a hint of bitterness in his tone, not because Larry couldn't come to his mom's funeral (he could care less about that), but because he was rarely ever there for his daughter. Peyton played off her disappointment at her father's lack of a presence in her life, but Lucas could tell that it left a void in her life just like his dead and estranged parents left in his.

"Peyton was there and that's all that matters," Lucas grabbed Peyton's hand and held it between his.

Larry looked back and forth between the two 18 year olds sitting across from him on the couch. "Dad…Lucas and I are…together," she emphasized the last word and smiled at Lucas, who was chuckling at Peyton's dramatic announcement of their relationship.

Larry continued to stare without offering any type of response. Peyton continued, "I'm also living with Lucas and Lily…there is no apartment."

Lucas tightened his grasp on her hand, giving her a firm squeeze that conveyed his support of her in spite of her father's obvious displeasure. Larry stood up and instead of getting upset, he looked as though he was putting a puzzle together in his head. "This makes a lot of sense," he said to himself as he pulled the piece of mail addressed to Peyton out of his back pocket.

"What makes sense?" she asked. "What's in your hand?

"It's from Sire Records."

Peyton's face lost a little color. "The guys that are working on renovating the house had some mail that wasn't forwarded to your…new home," he said the last two words acrimoniously.

"You opened my mail?" Peyton looked at the torn open envelope.

"Normally I wouldn't, but when I saw it was from the record company I got excited and thought they were offering you another internship."

Lucas looked at a silent Peyton and asked Larry if there was another internship offer.

"There is another offer for Peyton to intern in the fall," Larry confirmed.

"Well that's great…right?" Lucas looked at both Larry and Peyton, wondering why they looked so sullen at Larry's admission.

"Great?!" Larry echoed. "I thought you'd be disappointed."

"Why would I be disappointed?"

"Because you were the one who pressured Peyton into rejecting the first offer," Larry assumed. "You probably wanted to trap her into staying here to help you raise Lily."

"What?!!" Lucas scoffed indignantly at Larry's accusation and got up to grab the piece of paper he was holding. He read it and looked back at Peyton, his face searching hers, imploring for some kind of a sign that this was a mistake.

She couldn't give him one.


	8. Summer Rain

**Okay this chapter is longer than usual. I won't be updating until the end of the week but this should be more than enough to hold you over. This chapter is sort of like the climax of the fic. Hope you enjoy ******

_**Chapter Seven: Summer Rain**_

They stared at each other across the living room for what seemed like an eternity. Larry eventually broke the staring match, stating that he was tired and that he needed to find a hotel for the night. Lucas or Peyton didn't even attempt to offer him a place to stay, knowing that there was no way in hell he would want to stay there. Plus they knew they had a lot to talk about.

"Dad, call me tonight and tell me where you're staying. I want to take you to breakfast tomorrow."

"Okay sweetie." Larry kissed Peyton on the cheek and waved at Lucas before walking out of the front door.

Lucas was the first to speak after Larry left, "So you lied."

"Yes and I'm not going to apologize for it," Peyton responded. Lucas raised his eyebrows and crossed his arms. "Sure lying is wrong, but it's not as if the lie was so terrible. I wanted to stay and I did it for all of us: you, me and Lily. If you have a problem with that, then…you should start getting over it."

Lucas was taken aback at Peyton's words. "Is that how it's going to be from now on?"

"Is that how what's going to be?"

"Whenever I have a problem, I should just…get over it."

"Of course not. But in this particular case, I think you should."

"Well I don't think I can," he started slowly pacing around the living room. "Honestly I'm not surprised that you turned down the internship, but I am surprised that you felt compelled to keep this secret from me for all this time."

"Really? If I had told you back when I was supposed to leave, would you have agreed to let me stay here? Especially considering that we weren't even together back then."

"No," he answered honestly, "but that's not the point."

"Well what's done is done," Peyton said quickly. "There's no sense of arguing about it. It was my decision and I did what I thought was best."

"So I guess the discussion is over, huh?"

"Yep. Let's start talking about something important…like what we're having for dinner," Peyton said with a smile. Lucas was about to interject, but he thought he would wait to tell her what he needed to tell her until he had more time to think.

"You know what…I'll pick up dinner," Lucas suggested. He started getting Lily ready to go out with him.

"I'll watch her," she said.

"Actually I was going to take her to visit our mom before we picked up dinner. We haven't visited her grave since the 4th of July."

Peyton frowned slightly. She was a little disappointed that he didn't invite her to go, but she knew he probably needed some time to process everything. "Alright…I'll see you when you get back." She kissed Lily on her forehead, staring at her as if she were beautiful sunset or a unicorn. Lucas watched her watching Lily for as long as he could without feeling immensely guilty. "We're going to head out now," Lucas told Peyton, breaking her warm gaze at the baby before her.

The clouds were thick and gray as Lucas looked out of his car window. The air was still, eerily still…the calm before the storm.

Lucas paced towards his mother's headstone with Lily securely tucked in his arms. She was crying feverishly, something that happened a lot when Lucas was holding her. He stood at Karen's grave and closed his eyes. He was trying to somehow channel his mother into talking with him and giving him some advice. Lucas was in the process of making a huge life decision that would certainly affect him as well as Lily, and even Peyton, so he needed his mom to tell him that everything would be okay. Tears welled in his eyes as he looked down at his sister until he couldn't take it anymore. He began sobbing uncontrollably, struggling to control his breathing as he grabbed at his mother's headstone.

"I miss you so much Mom," he finally breathed out. "I just need to know that I'm making the right choice." He stood up, looking around for some sort of a sign, but all he heard was the piercing sound of a crying baby. Lucas rocked her slightly, patting her gently on the back before saying goodbye to their mom.

On the way back to the car, Lucas looked up at the sky and noticed the clouds slightly parting in the distance. The sun peeked out from beneath the thick, pallid clouds and it vaguely reminded him of the nights Peyton would spend in his room after she was attacked. He would come into his room after taking a shower and find Peyton wrapped securely in a multitude of blankets, her body curled into a fetal position. When she would hear him enter the room, the blanket would drop, ever so slightly, and her eyes would peak out and meet his. It always made him smile, especially when he would watch her eyes morph from the fearful expression she had so frequently donned, to eyes that smiled and almost danced. He would long to see the smile that he knew accompanied it, but she never dropped the blanket.

Despite the sun's appearance in the sky, the rain came down in a light drizzle, covering his car as they drove to a Chinese restaurant and then home. He opened the front door to his home, and found Peyton in the bedroom, lying in a fetal position with a blanket wrapped around her body. The irony made Lucas pause and shake his head as he paced towards her and sat on the bed beside her. This time he took it upon himself to pull the blanket down, exposing her lips to his eyes. He kissed her softly and laid down beside her.

"Did you clear your head?"

"I tried."

She turned her body to face him, "You can talk to me, you know."

Lucas took a deep breath. "Were you happy when you found out that Sire Records offered you another internship in the fall?"

Peyton looked around the room, the question clearly catching her off guard.

"Be honest," Lucas insisted.

"I don't know if I was happy as much as I was flattered. It's nice that they still want me," she admitted.

"Are you happy in Tree Hill?"

"Of course…you and Lily make me so happy."

"That's not what I asked. I asked if you were happy in Tree Hill and I'm not just talking about me and Lily. I'm talking about school and everything. Have you thought about what you're going to do this fall?"

"I'm…uh...I'm going to enroll in school."

"You do realize that the deadline for financial aid applications has already passed. Is Larry going to pay full tuition? UNC is pretty pricey. What are you going to study?"

"Lucas I don't know okay…geez." Peyton got off the bed and put her hands on top of her head. "Obviously I wasn't thinking very far into my career future when I decided to stay here," she stated.

"I know. I can't help but notice that lately you haven't seemed very excited about going to your art classes."

"Nothing gets past you," her tone was slightly sardonic. "I don't know…I guess it's one thing to be inspired and draw what I'm feeling." She shook her head. "All the things I'm drawing in my art class just don't feel like _my _drawings."

She shoved her hands in her pockets, "Maybe I'm just being silly."

"No you're not being silly," Lucas told her. "Come here." He walked towards her and pulled her into a hug. "I just want you to be happy, that's all," he whispered into her hair as he held her. "Maybe you should consider going to LA in the fall."

She pulled back and looked Lucas squarely in the eyes. "I can't leave you both behind. I just…can't."

Lucas looked turned his back towards her put his hands on his hip. "You told me to be honest Lucas, and I'm just telling you how I feel." Lucas turned back around.

"Actually…in the spirit of honesty, I have some things to discuss with you," Lucas declared. Just as he spoke, thunder began to sound outside, followed by the sound of porous rain hitting the roof.

"What kind of things?" She stared at him suspiciously.

"While you've been at your classes during the week, Lily and I have met some new people."

"I asked you how your day was everyday and you've never mentioned anything about meeting new people."

"Well I wanted to keep it to myself for awhile…at least until I was ready. You know how that is right?" Peyton rolled her eyes at him.

"Okay continue," she said with agitation in her tone. "Who are these new people?"

"They are a married couple and they live about ten minutes from Tree Hill. They are two of the sweetest, most genuine people I've ever met. John Fuller is 42 years old and his wife April is 41. They've been happily married for almost 20 years."

"Oookay…good for them," she said. "What do they want with you and Lily?"

"Well they have a very heartbreaking problem. April is unable to conceive children and they really want children."

"Lucas, I can't be their surrogate mother," she stated.

"This isn't a joke Peyton."

"I don't get—"

"Peyton," he closed his eyes and let out a painstakingly slow, labored breath, "the Fullers would like to adopt Lily."

"Whaaaat?!?!" she shouted. She gave Lucas the most bewildered look he'd ever seen before taking a few seconds to compose herself as much as she physically could. "Well…I mean…so what they _want_ to adopt Lily? I want my mom to rise from the dead, but that doesn't mean that it's going to happen."

"Peyton this isn't a joke."

"Oh really? You could have fooled me because this has to be a joke. You can't seriously be considering giving your own sister up for adoption!"

"I know it sounds ridiculous to you, but I've put a lot of thought into this and…I need to do this for Lily."

"No you need to do this for you," Peyton spat angrily. "Taking care of a baby is hard work Lucas, but it's not impossible. We've been making it work—"

"This isn't about that," his voice laced with frustration. "You're right…it is hard work taking care of a baby, but it's not just going to be hard on me. It's going to affect Lily even more. I'm going to be working all the time to support us and I don't want Lily being raised by a nanny. I want her to have two parents and I want her to have some stability and I want—"

"What the hell do you think I'm doing here Lucas?!" she screamed. "I'm here so we can be that for her!"

"But it wasn't your place to do that," he responded. "It was very noble of you…but this isn't your problem."

"Lily isn't a problem!" Peyton put her face in her hands to calm herself down. "She is very important to me, and I would have appreciated it if you would have consulted me before putting her up for adoption," she said through clenched teeth.

"What kind of stability can we offer her? Hell you just admitted that you weren't thinking very far into the future when you decided to stay here. We're kids Peyton! We're two 18 year old kids! And you have so much left to do in life."

"So you want me to go to LA," she said calmly after a couple minutes of silence.

"_You_ want to go to LA," he corrected her. "You just said that you only stayed here for Lily. Plus you're not happy going to art school—"

"Don't put words in my mouth," she demanded. "I didn't say I _only _stayed for Lily. Sure she was a big part of my decision, but so were you. I wanted us to be a family and I could have been happy even if I wasn't doing what I wanted do to for a living." A tear fell down her face as she stood up and walked towards Lucas' bedroom door.

Lucas didn't know what to think of what Peyton just said to him. Why was she so set on being a family with him when she was only 18? Sure he wanted a family with her at some point, but they had plenty of time.

"I still can't believe you're just going to give her away," Peyton said shaking her head.

"She's going to be ten minutes away and the Fuller's agreed to an open adoption. They want us to be a part of Lily's life."

"_Us_ huh? I wish _us _had made this decision," she said bitterly.

"Peyton—"

"I…I need some time." She stuttered as she turned the knob of the door.

"Peyton it's pouring outside. Just stay and talk to me…please."

"Don't wait up."

She was so upset that she would have slammed the door behind her, but Lily was sleeping in the nursery.

So she slammed her car door instead.

---

Lucas wanted to go after her, but he couldn't bring Lily outside in the rain. He just prayed and prayed that she would come home before anything happened to her.

Peyton got into her Comet and called her dad to find out where he was staying. She drove straight to his hotel, where she greeted him with an emotional embrace. "What happened Honey?"

"Do you have your laptop?" Peyton asked, avoiding his question.

"Yes but I need you to talk to me before you can use it."

Peyton walked into his room and sat on a chair by the window. "Lucas is giving Lily up for adoption. I want to find the address of the couple that's adopting Lily so I can pay them a visit."

"A visit to do what?"

"I just want to meet them. If Lucas is going through with this, I want to introduce myself to the Fuller's so we can establish some kind of relationship. Even though I'm still incredibly pissed off about the whole thing, I want to be in Lily's life regardless of where she lives…or where I live."

"Are you moving out of Lucas'?"

"I've decided to go to LA."

"Really? Did this Lily business change your mind?"

"No. Well not completely. I'm not feeling too excited about going to college in the fall and even if I was excited, I don't want to take out a bunch of loans or have you pay for the expensive tuition."

"Peyton you know I would pay for it."

"I know…but it's not necessary. I'm taking the internship."

"That's wonderful Peyton…I'm so proud of you," he hugged her.

"So what does that mean for you and Lucas?"

"I don't know," she shrugged.

"I know you're upset at him but…he's only doing what he feels is the right thing. I'm sure he struggled with this decision and in the end, sometimes people have to make tough choices. Even though I haven't been around much, I can tell that Lucas would do anything for that girl…just like he would do anything for you."

Peyton stared at the wall, trying to control her emotions. Larry continued, "I'm sorry for what a terrible father I've been—"

"You have not been terrible," she interrupted.

"Well I haven't been father of the year either. I saw how supportive Lucas was of you earlier today and… well I couldn't help but feel that you're in good hands. You just have to trust that Lucas is putting Lily in good hands as well."

Tears fell down Peyton's face as she looked at her father. "Oh Peyton I'm so proud of you. Even though I didn't agree with your decision to turn down the first internship, you stood up and did something really special for Lucas and Lily. You're going to be a great mother…20 years from now."

Peyton started crying even more.

"I'll go get my laptop."

Peyton found the Fuller's address rather easily, and after a few words of encouragement from her dad, she got in her car headed to the Fuller home. The rain was beating down extremely hard as Peyton pulled up to her destination. She wondered fleetingly if it was too late to show up at someone's house (it was 8:00pm) but she had gone too far to back out now. She was about to open her car door when her phone rang. It was Lucas.

"Hello."

"Peyton are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

"Where are you? When are you coming home?"

"I don't know when I'm coming home. But I'm at Lily's new home though. Very clean street, well kept lawn, white picket fence, neighborhood watch signs…it doesn't get any better than this."

"Are you going to go inside?"

"I don't know if they'll like a surprise visit by someone they don't know at 8 o'clock at night."

"They know plenty about you," Lucas corrected her.

"They don't know how I look."

"I've shown them pictures."

"Are you sure these people aren't psychos?"

"Yes…the adoption agency did a thorough background check on them plus I got their fingerprints and checked their house for any signs of psycho activity."

"Oh right…I forgot you were the expert on sniffing out psychos," Peyton smiled to herself. "Do you think it's a good idea if I go in?"

"They've been dying to meet you Peyt. You should go."

Peyton hung up the phone and nervously walked to the front door of the Fuller home. She rang the bell once, the chimes were loud and she could hear a pair of voices on the other side of the thick burgundy door. A middle aged woman opened the door, and gazed back at Peyton. She was about 5"7 medium build, had short sandy blonde hair and warm blue eyes. Who Peyton assumed was her husband came up behind her. He was tall and burly, maybe 6"2 with short dark brown hair and a square shaped face.

April Fuller opened the door and immediately wrapped her long arms around Peyton, "You must be Peyton…Lucas has told us so much about you. You look even more beautiful in person."

Peyton could do nothing but smile.

---

Lucas was waiting by the door when Peyton arrived back home. She was soaking wet and her demeanor was slightly similar to the demeanor she had when she left three hours earlier. But she was definitely calmer, which Lucas was extremely thankful for. He hated seeing her so upset.

Before either of them said a word, they were in each other's arms. They weren't sure who initiated the hug, but it didn't matter, they never felt safer than where they currently were.

"So what did you think of the Fuller's?" he asked hesitantly.

"They were amazing…just like you said. They were so kind, and welcoming…I thought they wanted to adopt me," Peyton laughed. "I know it's impossible to really know everything about someone after meeting them for the first time, but I feel I like I've known them forever."

"But you're still not okay with it are you?" He knew her like the back of his hand.

"I don't know if I'll ever be completely okay with it. But…I can't imagine two better people caring for Lily…besides us of course."

Lucas shook his head.

"So I talked to my dad and I've decided to take the internship this fall."

"That's great Peyton," the enthusiasm in his voice wasn't nearly as convincing as he hoped it was.

"Just so you know…I'm not leaving just because of Lily."

"I know. This is something you need to do for yourself and I completely understand." He paused and continued, "I don't think I'll ever be able to repay you for what you've done for us. I know it seemed like I was upset at you about not taking the first internship, but there's no question that you did it out of love and you did it with nothing but kind intentions. You saved us and I'll forever be thankful for the sacrifices you made." Lucas could feel his eyes filling with tears as he looked her directly in her eyes.

Peyton started to cry. Lucas rubbed her back to calm her.

"Peyton I know you really wanted us to be a family, but we still can have that, I promise. After you've done everything to achieve that greatness that I know you'll achieve, we can start the family that we've never had," he kissed her forehead. "We'll even have the Fuller's as part of our family too. Everything will work out for the best…I know it."

However, Peyton's outward appearance didn't convey anything close to suggesting that she was convinced.

"Is there something you want to tell me?" Lucas questioned. "Why are you having such a hard time with this? You're going to be in Lily's life whenever you come back to Tree Hill…I mean…what more do you want?"

Peyton looked squarely at him, "I want the doctor that examined me earlier this year, to call me and tell me that his prognosis was wrong."

Lucas nearly went into cardiac arrest. To say that he was terrified after hearing Peyton say "doctor", would be a vast understatement.

Peyton sensed this and reassured him, "Don't worry I'm not dying or anything."

"Then what is it?" he managed to force out those four words with limited breath.

She paused, "Let's just say that April Fuller and I have some things in common."


	9. Running To Stand Still

_**Chapter Eight: Running To Stand Still**_

Lucas sat in his chair with his hands folded, trying his best to listen to every word Peyton was saying. She wasn't as emotional as he would have expected her to be while she talked about her infertility. She had indeed come to terms with the idea that she would never bear children, an odd reality for her to be facing at such a young age. Lucas heard bits and pieces of the medical jargon Peyton spoke of, the words uterine fibroids standing out in her speech. He only spoke to make sure they weren't malignant, and she quickly assured him that they weren't. She also mentioned that the doctor said it wouldn't be impossible for her to conceive, but the chances were slim at best and, even if she did, the possibility of having a miscarriage was very high.

Peyton admittedly attributed part of her fascination with creating a makeshift family with him and Lily to her inability to conceive children. Lucas, still taken aback by Peyton's confession, wondered how big a part her impotence played in her decision to stay in Tree Hill. She was, without question, offended when Lucas, in her mind, inferred that her impotence played a larger role in her decision to stay than her love for him and Lily did.

"Peyton, I didn't say that."

"Well that's what it sounded like to me."

"Why are you getting so defensive about this?"

"I don't know."

"Peyton when I told you that I was thankful for the sacrifice you made, I meant it. You don't have to feel guilty about anything. The whole time you were here it never once felt like you were using me and Lily. I know you love us."

"I do," Peyton said without hesitation, "so much."

"I love you," he responded.

"It's funny," Peyton said, the tone of her voice betraying her words, "before I found out I would probably never bear children, I hadn't even thought about having kids. I certainly didn't envision myself getting pregnant and pushing out babies. I guess it's true when people say you don't know what you have until it's gone."

Lucas took her hands in his.

"I'm too young for this," she sighed helplessly.

Lucas' heart broke for her. She had been such a strong presence for him during such a difficult summer. Whenever he needed comfort and assurance she was there, doing whatever she could to soothe him and help him forget.

"Peyton this isn't the end of the world. You're 18 years old…you have to live each day as it comes. The only thing you should focus on is following your dreams. Everything else will fall into place."

She nodded and sat down on the bed. She realized that her struggles with producing a family weren't going to be something she would get past overnight.

"So you're really going through with this adoption thing?"

"Nothing is set in stone. I have two weeks to decide and honestly, my mind changes every day," he sighed. "I've dealt with death, relationship issues, having HCM, being abandoned by my father, and so on, but I've never faced anything this difficult."

"I know," Peyton empathized.

"What if Lily winds up hating me for giving her up? Or what if I fail as her guardian and she hates me once she realizes that I could have given her up to a family that can take her places and give her whatever she wants. You know the Fullers have a villa in Italy and they've been all over—" he rambled.

"Lucas, do you really believe that Lily would care about that stuff when she grows up? Look at me. I have a dad who supports me financially but it's not enough. It will _never_ be enough. I've decided that I'm done trying to persuade you, but I really think that you need to start thinking about what's important in all this."

Lucas sighed soundly. "You're right," he grabbed a fistful of his hair in frustration, "It's just…I feel so erratic and helpless right now."

Peyton stared at him as he began to rock back and forth on the bed, his physical movements mirroring his tortured emotional state. "The Fullers said they would support me no matter what decision I make," he said after many moments of silence.

"They know how tough this is for you…this is something you can't take back."

"I know," he whispered.

Just as Lucas was going through a multitude of emotions, so was Peyton. She felt sorry for Lucas because of how tortured his impending decision was making him, but she couldn't help but feel angry at him for deliberately keeping everything from her for so long. It's one thing to lie in order to be close to the ones you love, but it's another thing when your lack of disclosure alienates someone you love. She couldn't argue that Lucas had every right to want to do what's best for Lily, but it still hurt not to be a part of something so significant in Lucas' life. It was starting to bring to Peyton's attention, a glaring problem in their relationship. There were moments, like the first time he visited his mom's grave, where Lucas allowed himself to be vulnerable and need her, but his lack of communication about the adoption idea was another example of the "I can do everything on my own" Lucas, that Peyton saw (and didn't like) during the earlier parts of her stay at his house.

One step forward…two steps back. Maybe I'm the one holding him back, she thought.

"While we're on the subject of tough decisions," Peyton asserted, "there's something I need to talk to you about." She paused and attempted to gain control over her trembling hands, "There are things that…" she began. "I mean I don't know how to say this…" she continued. "It's just that…" she trailed off.

"Just spit it out Peyton," Lucas said finally.

"I think it would be best if we take some time apart while I'm in LA," she finally let out.

His mouth fell slightly ajar and he stared at her, wide eyed and unsuspecting. Just as he was about to respond, the sounds of Lily's faint crying filled his bedroom.

"I've got her," Lucas practically ran out of the room and into the nursery. He closed the door behind him, and walked over to Lily's crib. Large droplets were leaking out of her blue eyes, her face contorted, her onesie askew on her body. Lucas held her in her arms and sat down in the rocking chair while she belted out. He thought about Peyton and about his future in Lily's life and, for the second time that day, he grew emotional. But this time the tears wouldn't stop. They came down in rhythm with the pitter-patter of the rain hitting the roof outside. A few of his tears sprinkled Lily's cheeks and lips, rolling down her aesthetically cherubic face, soaking the fabric of her white onesie that glowed in the torpid dark shadows of the room. Lily's crying ceased as Lucas' crying picking up in intensity until his body shook and disrupted the steady rocking of the rocking chair they were in. He fell asleep soon after Lily drifted off, the uneven rise and fall of his chest serving as her crib…both baby and boy had cried themselves to sleep that night.

---

Peyton didn't sleep at all that night. It was Saturday morning, and she found herself sitting in the same spot she was sitting in when Lucas left the room and never came back. She finally got up to brush her teeth and use the bathroom, staring a hole into the nursery door on her way back to the bedroom. A minute later she heard the nursery door open, and she jumped out of her seat. Lucas emerged without Lily, she was still sleeping peacefully when he woke up, a pleasant deviation from her normal pattern of waking up early in the morning and throughout the night.

Lucas, conscious of Peyton's presence, but unaware of her location in the house, walked swiftly out of the nursery and into the bathroom. He closed the door before Peyton could get to him.

She suspected that he was avoiding her, but she waited all night to see him and she wasn't going to let him evade her all day. They needed to talk, and aside from that, she really missed him in the eight hours they spent apart. Eight hours. How was she going to go months without him? But she needed him to understand why she felt they needed some time apart from their relationship. If only he would come out of that bathroom.

When Lucas walked into the bathroom, he had every intention of brushing his teeth, washing his face and walking out. Yet he found himself sitting on ledge of the bathtub, going over what he was going to say to Peyton. Despite his initial shock at hearing Peyton say she wanted to go to LA as a single woman, he knew exactly why. They both needed a chance to find themselves individually before they could even think about talking about the future. As amazing as the past two weeks were, they were so confusing. He wasn't confused about the way he felt about her, of course not, but he was confused about where they were going from there, and how they were going to get there. But they _were_ going to get there and needed her to know that. He just needed to figure out how he was going to voice it to her.

He stood up; sitting in the bathroom wasn't going to accomplish anything, so he opened the door to find her standing in the hallway waiting for him to come out. Everything happened so fast, but in the mere second it took for him to get to her, he could see that she hadn't slept. There were creases in her forehead, definite signs of worry, and her eyes were bloodshot. He had every attention of talking to her rationally and sensibly, he really did, but he was sick of the tears and the angst that were sure to arise once they began talking about the forthcoming end of their relationship.

She remembered seeing him open the door and after that everything happened so fast. He exited the bathroom just as swiftly as he entered it. She opened her mouth to speak, but before she could utter a word, his hand was on the back of her head and his tongue was in her mouth. He moved her backwards, back into the bedroom and laid her down gently before lowering his body to meld with hers. Although he caught her by complete surprise, it didn't take her long to react to him, gripping and grabbing at his body, and kissing him senseless. However, her body was extremely fatigued, a long week of frustrating classes and project members, baby and boy drama, and a sleepless night catching up to her.

He hated that she stayed up all night worrying, but he wasn't ready to talk yet…that would certainly make their imminent breakup all the more real. So he kissed her and kissed her, praying she wouldn't stop him. He kissed her until she fell asleep. He watched her sleep until it was time to get Lily from the nursery. While she slept, she went through a series of physical movements and auditory sounds. She mumbled some incomprehensible words; she moaned his name, grabbed at the sheets, cried, stopped and then cried some more. There was way too much crying going on in this house, he thought. Peyton's internship started in three weeks, but he assumed she would leave a little before then so she could get situated in LA. If he only had a limited amount of time with her, he didn't want to spend it crying and upset.

While she slept, he planned to spend some one on one time with Lily. He dressed himself, and Lily, fed her and when he opened his front door to leave, he found Larry Sawyer standing on his doorstep.

"Good morning."

"Hi Lucas, is Peyton around?"

"Actually she's still sleeping. Lily and I are about to go eat breakfast."

"Do you mind if I wait here until she wakes up? Does she normally wake up this late?"

Lucas cringed inwardly at how little Larry knew about his own daughter. "Yeah she's normally a late sleeper but today she might sleep even later. She didn't get any sleep last night."

"Oh," Larry's face fell. Lucas could tell that he was looking forward to spending some time with his daughter.

"You're welcome to come to breakfast with us while Peyton sleeps…unless you have other plans."

"I'd like that."

The three of them headed off to breakfast in Lucas' car. They got a table at a small diner on the outskirts of Tree Hill. There wasn't much conversation in the car, other than the occasional "It's really nice outside today."

To which Lucas responded, "Yeah it is. Yesterday was pretty messy."

They both knew what that meant.

While perusing menu, Lucas took the opportunity to spark the conversation, "So how long are you here for?"

"I'm leaving tomorrow night. But I'm coming back in a couple of weeks to help Peyton move to LA."

"I bet you're excited for Peyton. I know I am," he added.

Larry looked at him uneasily, "I'm sorry for accusing you of convincing Peyton to stay when she was the one who chose to stay…I can tell that she loves you."

Lucas laughed.

"What's funny?" Larry said seriously.

"Peyton broke up with me last night."

Larry raised his eyebrows, "I'm sorry Lucas…You seem to be in good spirits though."

"Well Peyton and I had a nice _talk_ this morning," Lucas smirked to himself. "I think it's for the best. We both have some things to figure out…this isn't the end for us though."

"You sound confident," Larry pointed out.

"I am."

Their food arrived and they ate quietly. It took Lucas longer to finish his breakfast because he kept putting down his eating utensils to hold Lily and attend to her. Larry smiled at the way Lily responded to Lucas…he thought wistfully of his own daughter. "You ready to go?"

"Yeah Peyton should be up by now."

As Lucas picked Lily up and heading towards the door, Larry nudged him, "There's a waitress over there that's been staring at you the whole time we've been here. Don't tell me you've got a back up girlfriend just in case Peyton dumped you," he joked.

"Nah she's staring at me because Peyton and I dined and dashed at this restaurant last summer," Lucas explained. "We should probably get out of here," he laughed and moved swiftly through the restaurant.

---

Peyton awoke from her slumber and felt around the bed for Lucas' body. She blushed for a moment and became aware of her body temperature…for the second time in two days, her dreams were X-rated, filled with vivid imagery of her and Lucas entrenched deeply in the sacred act they had yet to take. This certainly had to be a sign. She didn't want to spend the next two weeks in tears, she wanted to spend the next two weeks enjoying the company of two people that had captured her heart.

She heard the door open and sat up in her bed, anticipating Lucas and Lily's return. Lucas strolled in the room holding Lily and, before saying a word, Peyton held out her arms for the little girl. She held Lily in her arms and Lucas asked her how she slept.

"I slept pretty well," she said with a twinkle in her eyes. Their eyes met and their gazes were both charming and delectable. They spoke no words of what happened, they were both choosing to stay mum about what transpired before Peyton's nap. It seemed as though they were on the same page about the way they wanted to spend their last two weeks together.

"Your dad is in the living room," Lucas broke the silence created by their glances.

"Oh wow I totally forgot that I was supposed to take him to breakfast," she said regrettably.

"I hope you don't mind but I invited him to go with me and Lily."

Peyton gave Lucas a wide smile, "Of course I don't mind…I appreciate it. Although I have to say that it's somewhat of a surprise that you guys spent a whole breakfast together," she said as she walked out of the room to greet her dad. "Hi again," Peyton hugged him.

"Hey honey. So I'm leaving tomorrow and I wanted to spend some time with you before I go."

"How long until I see you again after tommorrow?" Peyton questioned him.

"I just told Lucas that I want to help you with your move to LA. I'm only taking a two week job so I can get back to Tree Hill in time. Is that okay?"

"That's more than okay. Thank you dad."

"You shouldn't have to thank me for doing what a dad should be doing for his daughter."

Wow…she was liking this new and improved Larry. "So where are we heading today?"

"I thought we could just drive around and talk."

"Alright."

Before Peyton and Larry left, Lucas informed them, "Haley is cooking a Saturday night dinner at their apartment tonight and they invited us to join them."

"Sounds great," Peyton chimed. "Are you coming Dad?"

"No you kids have your fun. A friend of mine that I haven't seen in ages invited me out for some drinks later. Thanks for the invite though."

"I'll be back in a few hours," Peyton informed Lucas.

"Have fun."

After they left, Lucas sat on the couch with Lily sleeping in his lap. He was so emotionally exhausted and he needed a moment to himself to just reflect. Life sans Peyton started in two weeks and he was pretty anxious to discover what that life held for him and for Lily. He technically still had two weeks to decide if Lily was going to embark on that journey with him but truth be told, the verdict was in and there was no way he was changing his mind.


	10. The First Time

_**Chapter Nine: The First Time**_

It was 5:00 pm when Larry dropped Peyton off at Lucas' house. They hugged and said their temporary goodbyes, Larry promising to see Peyton in two weeks. Peyton thoroughly enjoyed the time with her dad, they talked about everything…including her medical condition, Lucas and her internship in LA. Larry listened mostly, offering many consolation gestures and words of comfort during their conversation. Although it was slightly awkward listening to Peyton go on and on about how much she loved Lucas and Lily, he was so relieved that she was even making an effort to fill him in on the important things in her life. And there was no question that Lucas and Lily were important to her.

She arrived back at Lucas' house around 5 pm. When she arrived Lucas was sitting on the couch reading a Sherlock Holmes story to Lily, who was currently occupied with a small stuffed animal.

"She looks so interested in that book you're reading," Peyton muttered sarcastically as she walked in the door.

"Yeah you laugh now, but in thirty years when Lily is the author of a great American novel, you'll remember this moment."

Lucas' mention of a thirty year time progression caused Peyton to wonder where they'd be in thirty years. She knew where she wanted to be, but she could only hope that she would get there.

"Well whatever she decides to do, I'm sure she'll be great at it." Peyton walked towards the bedroom door before pausing to ask Lucas a question, "Speaking of novels, did you ever finish writing the novel you told me about awhile ago? I know you said you were having a hard time finishing after Karen passed."

Lucas looked directly at Peyton and smiled, "It's done."

Peyton's eyes lit up with excitement and she started running off questions and congratulating him, "Luke that's great! When did you finish it? What helped you finish writing? Can I read it? I'm so proud of you!" She sat down beside him on the couch eagerly hoping to get more information.

"I finished it recently. I don't know…as soon as we started dating the words just seemed to flow right from my brain on to my laptop."

She looked at him humbly, a small smile playing on her lips.

"But you can't read it," Lucas added. "At least not now," he said with a look of boyish embarrassment on his face.

Peyton's face visibly dropped and then straightened, "Maybe you're right. I'm not sure I want to read about what a terrible basket case I am."

Lucas smiled, "That's so far from the truth, it's not even funny."

"So why can't I read it?" she said seriously.

"Because I don't think it would be appropriate for you to read a book that's basically a love letter to you when we're on the verge of going our separate ways," he said bluntly.

She paused and looked around the living room for a second. "I can handle it," she countered.

"Well I can't," Lucas said defiantly.

She looked at him painfully, her eyes misting over, and she turned her head in an attempt to stop the moisture from building in her tear ducts. Lucas looked away before getting up from the couch and taking Lily with him.

"We're leaving in an hour to head to Nathan and Haley's so you might want to get ready," he said, ending their current conversation…a conversation that was on the verge of turning into an agonizing exchange. He promised himself that he was done with the tears. But honestly, it seemed that the house was starting to become way too small to contain the both of them, in addition to everything they were harboring. Something had to give. It was just a matter of when.

They left the house exactly an hour later. The car ride was deafeningly quiet with the exception of random cooing sounds from the back seat of the Mustang. They weren't mad at each other per se, but there was an unmistakable tension between them that neither one of them was brave enough to verbalize.

They arrived at Nathan and Haley's house with Lily in tow, apparently Deb would be there to watch Lily and Jamie while the four of them ate dinner.

Deb opened the door shortly after Lucas knocked, little James was in her arms. "Awww if this isn't the cutest baby girl I've ever seen," Deb shrieked upon seeing Lily.

Lucas and Peyton smiled at Deb's excitement over Lily. "Oh hi Lucas, hi Peyton," she added as an afterthought.

"Hey Deb," they said simultaneously.

Haley and Nathan walked into the living room area to greet Lucas and Peyton. "Hey guys," Haley chimed. Everyone exchanged hugs and had a seat in the living room after Haley informed everyone that the food wasn't quite ready yet.

"I'm just going to take the little ones in Jamie's room," Deb declared.

The four of them were left alone to talk, however, there wasn't much discussion going on between them. Haley and Nathan automatically sensed the tension radiating from both Lucas and Peyton. They weren't acting very affectionate toward one another, and it was obvious, despite their attempts to be amiable guests.

Haley broke the silence, "Umm Lucas can you lend me a hand in the kitchen? Nathan's pretty useless on that front."

Nathan rolled his eyes at her, "I made the corn."

"Yes, opening that can was one hell of a culinary task," Haley laughed.

Lucas followed her into the kitchen, knowing full well that Haley didn't need any cooking advice.

"So what can Chef Lucas do for you?" he joked.

"He can tell me what's going on with him and his girlfriend," she responded.

"What girlfriend?"

"You two broke up?!" Haley whispered.

"Well…it's complicated. Peyton wants us to take some time apart while she's in LA but—"

"She's going to LA?!"

Lucas sighed loudly, realizing that there was a lot he had yet to tell his best friend. "Yes she is. It'll be good for her…and me," he said in an unconvincing tone.

"So you two are what...friends now?"

"No…I mean…I don't think so. I don't know what we are. But if I'm being honest with myself, I'll never see her as anything less than the girl I'm in love with."

"Those are strong words. Are you sure this break-up, or whatever it is, is what you want?"

"It's not what I want, but it's what we need."

Haley rolled her eyes at his cheesiness.

"I know it sounds cheesy," he smiled at Haley. "But this isn't the definite end for us." His face became staunchly serious and he said those words as though they were canon.

"Does she know that?" Haley asked.

Lucas was about to speak when Nathan and Peyton came strolling into the kitchen.

"That better be some good food with all the time you two are spending in this kitchen," Peyton said.

"Well the food is ready," Haley announced. Lucas helped her bring the food to the center of the table while Nathan and Peyton took their seats at the table. Lucas took a seat to left of Peyton and shot her a glance before he grabbed her left hand and held it for what seemed like forever. Peyton looked down at her hand, incredulously, wondering what the hell Lucas was doing. He smiled at her and for a second it looked like he was about to propose to her. She opened her mouth, but before she could speak any words, Lucas reached his arm across the table and grabbed Haley's hand in a similar fashion. He was only blessing the food. Of course.

Haley said the blessing and they began to pass around the various dishes on the table. The conversation was flowing a little bit better than it did in the living room. Peyton talked about her art classes and how she was glad they were almost over and Haley talked about how excited she was to start classes in the fall. Peyton informed Haley and Nathan that she would be in LA during the fall and they gave her congratulatory adulation.

They gave Lucas, however, sympathetic glances across the table.

"I'm really proud of her," Lucas smiled at Peyton and then back at Nathan and Haley.

Peyton quickly changed the subject, "So Nathan, how do you feel about being coached by your big brother in the fall?"

"Assistant coached," Nathan corrected her with a smug look on his face.

Lucas shot him an authoritative glance from across the table that Nathan playfully scoffed at. "It should be fun…as long as Lucas just watches how great I am from the sidelines and doesn't try to coach me," he laughed.

They spent the rest of the dinner talking about when Lucas first joined the Ravens and Nathan teased Lucas about the days when Peyton treated him like a wall. He even reminded Lucas not to "choke" on his water. Peyton couldn't help but laugh mirthfully at Nathan's quip. Haley was confused about the joke, but Lucas clearly wasn't enjoying the trip down memory lane that involved Peyton not really knowing who he was.

Peyton felt the need to tease Nathan a little as well, "Luke you might have choked during a basketball game, but at least you weren't the town jackass," Peyton looked at Nathan and then back at Lucas, smiling warmly at him.

"You obviously didn't know Lucas back then," Haley joked.

"What is it _Pick On Lucas_ day?" Lucas pouted.

"You're an easy target man," Nathan pointed out.

Lucas smiled and Peyton took a second to take in how gorgeous he was when he smiled. She already knew it, but she really wanted to memorize his smile and commit it to memory. She wanted to spend the next two weeks doing it, but she had a feeling that his smile wasn't going to make too many appearances.

They left Haley and Nathan's house an hour later after they spent some time playing with the kids. Once again the car ride was quiet, but it was definitely more of a pleasant silence. Lily was fast asleep in her car seat when Peyton turned around to check on her. The night was balmy and clear, the moon was full, and it shone quite brilliantly upon Peyton's bronzed skin. Her face was etched with a contemplative stare.

"Why can't you handle it if I read your book?" she said, abruptly cutting through the moonlit silence in which they were entrenched.

"It'll just make everything more difficult," he said vaguely without looking at her.

She sighed and placed her hand over his hand.

He spoke in a laboring tone, "I don't want to spend these next two weeks depressed, but I don't want to get in deeper than I already am…especially since I don't know what the future holds for us."

"But Lucas the future doesn't change the fact that we're here _now_. Weren't you the one that told me to live each day as it comes?"

He smiled, "It's nice to know that you listen to me whenever I start rambling." He pulled up to the house and parked the car.

He looked Peyton squarely in her eyes and tucked a strand of her softly coiled hair behind her ear. He moved forward and with a gentle urgency he pressed his lips firmly against her lips. She slid her hand up his torso to the back of his neck and rested her warm palm there, pushing his head even closer to hers as she lost herself in the kiss. They both still had their seatbelts on, uncaring of the physical restraints at that moment, they continued to nip at each other's lips. Peyton finally tired of her seatbelt and hastily removed it. They both suddenly realized where they wanted their make-out to lead and that they would probably need to finish their explorations in a less confined, less car-like space. They swung their car doors open simultaneously, Lucas getting Lily out of the backseat and Peyton practically bouncing to the front door of the house, fumbling with her keys on the way.

She made a beeline for the bedroom and started pacing back and forth, unsure of what to do next. Lucas placed Lily in her crib, careful not to wake her. He exited the nursery, his mind racing with anticipation, his loins pulling and stretching the seam of his slacks. He found her in the bedroom, still fully dressed in her long linen skirt and her thin sleeveless halter top.

"Should I light some candles?" she asked as he entered the room. "Or maybe—"

Lucas pulled her close and placed a finger to her lips, "You just have a seat and relax, I'll handle it," he whispered huskily in her ear. His movements were precise and confident as he glided across the room to light some candles and freshen up the bedroom. She thought him to be extremely sexy when he was assertive and knew exactly what he wanted. He had a tendency to over think things sometimes, but she wanted him to be more instinctual, more intuitive…it would certainly help him in everyday life and in his decision on whether to keep Lily or not.

He finished making the room as romantic as he possibly could given the spontaneity with which they made the decision to consummate their relationship for the first time.

Lucas walked over to where Peyton sat at his desk and extended his hand to her. "Aww you're so romantic," Peyton smiled at him before placing her diminutive hand in his.

"I just want it to be special. There's a lot of pressure… especially since you've dreamed about this a couple of times already," he grinned at her.

Her face flushed with embarrassment, "You knew about that?"

He nodded his head and lowered the strap of her top, dragging his supple lips across her shoulder. He led her to the edge of the bed and he kneeled down before her. His expression was placid, reverent even as he looked up at her with soft cerulean eyes. She brushed his hair back and away from his forehead to get a better view of his eyes.

He began to work the buttons of her skirt and he watched as the skirt dropped down her legs and onto the floor.

When he kissed her above her naval, she shivered slightly and closed her eyes. She felt her underwear being removed, and could hear Lucas' irregular breathing pulsating in her ears. Then she felt his irregular breathing as he breathed against her thighs. She was aching at that point, shutting her eyes even tighter in anticipation of what was next. He gripped her hips tightly, and licked her languorously for several minutes until she began trembling violently against his face. She murmured his name amid other words he couldn't quite discern and took a handful of his hair.

She came rather powerfully and Lucas took his time, making sure he swallowed it all, still licking her until she couldn't take it anymore. He loosened his grip on her hips for a second and she partially fell on top of him. He scooped her lithe body off of the floor and placed her gently on the bed. He was in the process of removing his shirt when he noticed that tears had fallen from her eyes and stained her cheeks. He wasn't sure if they were a result of her powerful orgasm or if they were wistful tears. Either way, he didn't like to see them. He gently wiped them away and kissed both of her eyes in the process.

She was still recovering from her high, but he was being so tender with her that it turned her on even more. She grabbed his face with both of her hands and kissed him as he hovered over her. She raked her fingers down his back and tugged at his shirt, silently beckoning him to take it off. He took off the shirt and lifted her back off the bed to remove her shirt as well. His eyes darkened as he took her in, and he began to kiss her all over her body, muttering phrases between each of his kisses. Peyton didn't realize what he was saying exactly until she noticed that he seemed to be reciting something as opposed to murmuring random things in the heat of passion.

"Wait what did you say?"

He pushed himself up on the bed and looked her in the eyes," I said, Peyton Sawyer is destined for greatness, actually she's already great…because Peyton Sawyer has a thing called integrity and nothing or no one is ever going to change that."

She stared at him imploringly. "It's from my book," he said timidly.

She touched his face and smirked, "So basically all I had to do was get naked in order to hear some of your book."

He smiled widely at her.

"So what do I have to do to hear more?" she reached to the front of his jeans and pressed her hand up against him.

He gasped, "You keep doing that, and you can hear whatever you want." He grunted when she pressed harder, "I'll even sing for you."

"That won't be necessary. But what you said about me in the book is really beautiful."

"That's just the tip of the iceberg…like _this_," he continued to shower her body with affection.

Peyton let him kiss and suck her neck, breasts and lips until she grew restless and impatient, needing to feel some reprieve from the twinge between her legs.

"Lucas…Lucas please," she writhed beneath him before she guided his body to level with hers, and eased her hand down the front of his pants.

He groaned loudly and quickly unbuttoned and discarded his pants. He then reached in his drawer and fumbled around for a condom.

"We don't really need a condom," Peyton reminded him. "Unless…"

"I haven't slept with anyone in a long time," he admitted.

She nodded absently and pulled him back down on the bed. He shed his boxer briefs and placed his hands near the tops of her thighs. She spread them even more, allowing him a better passage to the place she wanted him. She grabbed the sheets and prepared for him to enter her. He braced himself as well, saying a silent prayer in hopes that he would last long enough to make this memorable.

They both cried out loudly when he finally slid inside of her. They rocked leisurely against each other for a moment, taking the time to adjust to the feelings they were experiencing. When Lucas picked up the pace, Peyton did as well. Neither of them spoke, they couldn't really talk, so they just concentrated on each other and how fulfilling it felt to finally be intimate with one another.

It continued on that way for awhile until Peyton started to quiver and slam her arms into the mattress. "Right there, right there," she breathed out. "Luke…honey--" she arched her back.

"Oh God I love you," he groaned.

She grabbed a pillow and muffled her screams as they came at the same time. Lucas lost his balance, the sheer force of his orgasm caused his arms to buckle, and he landed on top of her. "I'm sorry…did I hurt you Peyt?"

She nodded her head no. He tried to roll off of her but she held fast to him. "Stay right here," she wrapped her arms around his upper body and held on tightly to him. She stroked his hair back and softly kissed his forehead and his neck. She whispered in his ear that she loved him and told him that she would love him forever.

A drop of moisture dripped from his body onto her neck and she wondered fleetingly if it was sweat or if the moisture was from his eyes. She heard him sniffle into her neck and shortly after, his body relaxed underneath her touch as she caressed him. Yep, a million times better than her dreams, she thought.

They drifted off into a peaceful sleep…until Lily's shrill cries at 3 am snapped them back into reality.


	11. Sunday, Bloody Sunday

**Sorry about the lack of updates. I've been so busy lately and this story isn't writing itself anymore. Hope you enjoy the update.**

_**Chapter Ten: Sunday Bloody Sunday**_

Lucas always loved Sunday mornings. He would lie in bed and leisurely listen to his mother's soulful humming from the sunlit kitchen as she flipped French toast slices by the stove. The aroma of cinnamon and brown sugar would penetrate his nostrils from his bedroom and make him smile. His mom always made sure she was home on Sunday mornings, regardless of whatever obligations she had at the café. She loved eating breakfast with her son, and talking to him about the upcoming week. She would look at Lucas, as only a parent could, as he drenched his French toast slices in thick syrup, only stopping when the French toast began to float on his plate.

"I see you like French toast with your syrup," she would always say.

"Yep…so keep that French toast coming, I've got a bottle of syrup to get through."

Karen would smile at her son's kitchen table enthusiasm and comment on how rotund he would be if he didn't play basketball.

Lucas hadn't had breakfast with his mom in fourteen Sundays, but after the Saturday night he and Peyton shared, this should have been one of his best Sunday mornings in recent memory. It _should _have been.

He opened his eyes and immediately reached out for her, although he could have sworn that she fell asleep in his arms after they made love for the second and last time earlier that morning. When they put Lily back to sleep at around 3:20 that morning, they laid back down together on the damp sheets and felt the writhing of desire again, so monstrous was their appetite for one another. They were flirting with extremely dangerous territory, however, but they were well aware of the consequences and they were determined to give their hearts what they deserved, if only for a couple more weeks.

Lucas was surprised and exceedingly disappointed when he discovered that Peyton not only wasn't lying beside him, but she wasn't even at home. His heart sunk. He walked through the house, clad in his boxers, until he found his cell phone in the living room. He wanted to call her, but he was afraid she wouldn't pick up. He was afraid that somewhere between her gasping his name in the heat of passion at 4:00 am and her waking up, that she regretted their night together. He'd accepted that they weren't going to be an item while Peyton was LA, but he didn't think he could stomach Peyton having regrets about the love they shared.

After a few moments of terrorizing doubt, he dropped the phone and checked in on a sleeping Lily before indulging in a long hot shower, and a cup, okay four cups of coffee. He kept thinking about where she was or when she was coming back. Maybe she was picking up breakfast. Scratch that, all the breakfast places were closed on Sundays.

Peyton, unbeknownst to him, was actually with her art group working on their final project. She was so thankful that this was her last week of classes, because she wanted to spend as much time as possible with Lucas and Lily before she left.

She probably should have told Lucas that she would be busy that morning, but she didn't remember her art class obligation until she woke up that very morning. And he looked so adorable lying there, with the sheet barely covering his flushed, massively naked body, that she couldn't possibly wake him. She really wanted to lie in bed with him all day, and be there when he woke up, but she couldn't flake out on her group in the last week of class.

She met her classmates at an art studio that Chelsea worked at. They worked for a few hours and Peyton was free to leave. On the way back to Lucas', Peyton picked up some items from Pier 1and a small flower shop. She bought some candles and a bouquet of lilies to bring back to the house.

"Lucas," she called as she walked through the front door. A wave of relief passed through him when he heard her voice. He followed it into the living room and was pleasantly surprised to see her in one of his Raven t-shirts, wearing her hair in that messy bun that he loved so much, holding some lilies in her hands.

"Makes a guy feel cheap…give it up and poof…vanishing girlfriend."

"Poof?'

"Poof."

Lucas moved closer to her, "although the lilies are a nice touch. That's really sweet of you," he reached to grab the lilies out of her hands.

She moved them out of his grasp, "they're not for you, they're for the house."

She paused and smirked, "well actually lilies are my favorite so they're probably more for me. But seriously," her face morphed into an earnest expression, "I'm sorry for leaving you this morning, but I had a group project meeting that I almost forgot about."

"You could have woken me up," he said softly, placing his hands on both sides of her arms.

"Yeah but you looked so…satisfied. And you definitely needed some rest after the night we had."

"It was amazing," he said huskily before he kissed her softly on the lips, "both times", he added. He pulled back after the kiss and Peyton could just look in his eyes and see how terribly in love he was. It flattered her more than worried her at that point. It felt odd for them (especially them) to be so imprudent in the face of an indefinite separation, but they were young, and the reckless way they were giving their hearts to each other had become strangely thrilling to them, as opposed to being incredibly frightening.

He looked in her bag, "you bought more candles too? These will definitely come in handy."

"I thought so," she agreed. "So what do you want to do today?"

He looked at her bashfully and pursed his lips, "well we could…"

"I mean other than that," she smiled and turned red. "We should do something with Lily."

Peyton walked into the nursery to say good afternoon to the baby. Lucas followed her. She stood by the crib and couldn't help but laugh at what Lily was wearing.

"Where did you get this onesie?" she asked Lucas. The onesie had the words "I Luv Peyton" on it.

Lucas smiled, "The Fullers sent it in the mail. There's an "I Luv My Brother" one and an "I Luv Sleep" one too."

"Seems like the Fullers are pulling out all the stops," Peyton mumbled offhandedly.

"I don't know…I think they're just being nice."

She sighed, "I'm sorry…I've tried not to interfere with the whole adoption thing but—"

"It's okay Peyton."

They stood silently for a few more moments until Peyton broke the silence. "It's pretty hot outside today so whatever we do today, it should probably be indoors. Maybe you could give me the rest of your book and I'll read it to Lily. If I'm in it, she'll probably enjoy it more than that Sherlock Holmes book you were reading to her yesterday."

Lucas shook his head and smiled at Peyton's attempt to read his book.

"I guess I'll have to wait until we're naked again," she pouted playfully.

"So I'm thinking we could have a quiet Sunday dinner here and maybe watch a movie or something afterwards. I just want the three of us to spend some time together…I don't really care what we're doing," he playfully tugged at her shirt, pulling her closer to him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him gently, "that sounds perfect Luke."

"So I'll go to the grocery store and pick up some things for dinner, and you can stay and watch Lily. Is that cool?"

"Yeah that's fine. I've wanted some alone time with my favorite girl," Peyton cooed at the giggly baby that she just picked up from her crib. "But we're not going to tell Brooke that you're my favorite girl, are we? Are we, Lils?" she tickled the baby's belly.

"Well she's excited for some Peyton time," Lucas chuckled at Lily's high pitched squeals. He certainly didn't need an "I Luv Peyton" onesie to validate his little sister's apparent love for Peyton.

They spent the rest of the Sunday eating chicken, bread and pasta and watching VHS Disney movies from Lucas' collection. Peyton didn't waste an opportunity to tease him about it even though he claimed that the movies were Haley's from when they were little. They spent some quality time with Lily, even getting in a tiny argument about whether or not Lucas heard her say the word "bun", with Peyton telling him he was crazy because 4 month old babies can't talk. After Peyton got tired of trying to hear Lily "speak", she yawned and stretched her arms above her head, exposing a sliver of tanned skin underneath her t-shirt. Lucas' eyes darkened to a rich, royal blue, and that was all it took before he was carrying her bridal-style into the bedroom and laying her down on the bed.

The rest of the week followed a similar pattern with Peyton going to her last week of classes and spending the rest of her days and nights with Lucas and Lily. Peyton didn't even think about the fact that she was leaving until Brooke called her on a Sunday afternoon, one week before Peyton was set to leave.

"Hi P. Sawyer!"

"Hey Brooke. Long time no hear."

"Yeah I know…I've just been so busy working. Between Victoria Secret, launching Clothes Over Bros., and dealing with Victoria, I've been swamped. And that's not including the social scene I've been forced to participate in."

Peyton laughed, "You make it sound like a job."

"Yep and I did some serious overtime last night."

"Well if that's the case, you were a hard worker in high school."

"I guess you're right. So one week to go…are you excited for LA because I cannot wait to finally see your boney ass."

"I can't wait to see you either but…"

"You're bummed about leaving Luke and Lily?"

"Yeah…I'm excited about this internship but I'm really, really going to miss them."

"I know… doing the long distance relationship thing is going to be tough Peyton, but I'm going to help you through it."

"Actually Lucas and I are going to take a break while I'm in LA."

"I thought you two were in love and all that?"

"Yeah we are but as the old adage goes _if you love something let it go, if it comes back to you it's yours_, etc., etc," Peyton said ploddingly.

"That's funny because I actually just heard someone say that to me."

"Who the hell are you in LA with talking about love?"

"Oh no one really…just a blast from your past."

"What?"

"Jake is in LA, Peyton."

"Jake as in, Jake Gyllenhaal?"

"Nope, this Jake has a daughter named Jenny."

"How did you run into them?"

"It's a long story, but I ran into them at a restaurant in Pasadena. They were with some people, his cousins I think, and we talked for quite a while. He asked about you and I told him you would be in LA very soon. Apparently something happened with Nikki and he got full custody of Jenny. He said some other stuff too, but he made me promise to get in touch with him whenever you got here."

"Oh that's nice."

"That's nice? Please try and contain your excitement."

"We can talk about everything once I get there. I really do miss you B. Davis."

"When you get here, I need to whip you back into party shape so we'll save the talking for later."

"Brooke my dad is going to come out there with me for a couple days to help me get settled in. I found a small apartment just outside of LA."

"Ooh Larry's coming? That's even better," she said in a sultry tone.

"Eww…can we not go there with the DILF jokes?"

Brooke laughed, "Sure thing. I'll talk to you soon P. Sawyer. Love you."

"Love you too Brooke. Bye."

Lucas walked in the room as Peyton hung up the phone. "That was Brooke, huh?"

"Yeah, she's pretty excited to see me."

"I'm glad you'll have Brooke in LA with you. You being in a big city like LA by yourself would worry me."

Peyton tilted her head, "Luke you don't have to worry about me. But I love you for it."

His eyes were warm and comforting; she just loved how he could make her feel so safe with simple words and glances.

"So what does Brooke have planned for you when you get there?" Lucas inquired innocently.

"She was telling me that she ran into Jake in Pasadena and she promised him that we'd all get together when I get to LA."

Lucas paused, "Oh that's nice."

Peyton laughed at the fact that Lucas said the same thing that she did.

"What's funny?"

"Nothing…I said the same thing when Brooke told me. But it'll be nice to see him and Jenny again."

"Of course."

He pulled her into a hug, wrapping his lean arms around her as she buried her face into his chest and exhaled.

Lucas wasn't really threatened by anything in LA and Peyton was glad. They seemed to be on the same page about everything regarding Peyton's departure, and it was just a matter of them taking this time for themselves and eventually finding their way back to each other. It seemed so simple to them at the time. Everything seems simpler at 18 years of age.

Their last week together was even better than the week before. Since Peyton didn't have any classes to go to, they were able to wake up beside one another every day, sated and filled with vivid memories of the things they did the night before. During the week, they visited the Fullers with Lily. They insisted on cooking Peyton a big farewell dinner and they also insisted that Peyton come to them whenever she needed anything…Lucas as well. He was well aware that the deadline was fast approaching for his decision on whether or not to give Lily up and even though he was set in his decision, he couldn't be patient enough.

The Saturday night before Peyton was scheduled to leave, Lucas planned a trip to the Rivercourt. The message he'd written to her on their first date had faded, and they sat in the Comet with Lily in the backseat, bobbing her head around to The Cure's _Last Dance_ that Peyton placed in the stereo. It was a strangely quiet night, there were no bugs or birds or crickets or any sign of nature. It was just them, Robert Smith's haunting staccato vocals, and the lights from the street lamps high above the faded words on the Rivercourt. Peyton couldn't have dreamt it better than that.

Lucas woke up on Sunday morning and reached out for Peyton, finding her side of the bed empty and cold. The smell of cinnamon and brown sugar floated into his nostrils and he thought he might have been dreaming. When he realized that he wasn't dreaming, he located his boxers and walked into the kitchen. Lily was nestled into her little baby bassinet watching Peyton stand at the stove. She had her back to Lucas but he could see that she was wearing his mom's apron and he could hear her humming just like his mom would do. He watched her, deeply rooted in the task of making French toast and he felt the pangs of longing for his mom and those Sundays he loved so much. But he also felt hope.

"Good morning," Lucas said once Peyton turned around and saw him staring at her.

"Good morning Luke…I made breakfast."

"It smells great. Although, I should be cooking you breakfast since you're the one that's leaving."

"You've cooked enough for me during my time here. I just want our last breakfast to be special. My dad should be here later in the afternoon to help me with my belongings so we can be ready for our 5:00 flight."

Lucas nodded without saying a word and suddenly Peyton felt emotional. Their breakfast was ready and she told Lucas to grab a seat at the table. She set the French toast on the table and said grace before they dug in. She watched as Lucas grabbed two French toast slices, placed them on his plate and drenched syrup all over the plate until the French toast floated in the sticky syrup.

"That looks like one sweet breakfast," Peyton observed.

He looked up from his plate at her, his eyes were serious, yet thoughtful, "more like bittersweet." He grabbed her hand and they ate the rest of their breakfast silently. Peyton spent the rest of her time making sure her bags were packed and ready to go.

Larry showed up, just as they planned, and Lucas helped him place Peyton's bags in the car. They arrived at the airport and stood at the security gate, the random people walking around them were non-existent to them at that point. Lucas said goodbye to Larry as he left for the gate to give the two kids some extra time to say their difficult goodbyes. Peyton held Lily in her arms and kissed the little girl's forehead stubbornly, as if letting her go was going to be the death of her. "I'm not giving her up," Lucas blurted out. "I'm not giving her up for adoption."

Peyton's eyes welled with tears and she nodded her head feverishly. "I knew it. I knew it," she sniffled. The tears fell down her cheeks and rolled into Lily's forehead. Lucas wiped the tears away and with both hands on either side of her face, he kissed her deeply, gently sipping at her lips after the kiss. "I love you Peyton."

"I love _you_. I always have. And I love you too," she said in Lily's direction.

They kissed again and Peyton placed Lily in Lucas' arms, silently thankful that Lily would be in those arms (arms that have protected her more times than she could count) as opposed to anyone else's. She loved the Fullers, she really did, but they weren't Lucas. She had all the faith in the world that Lucas would be the best brother and guardian to Lily, regardless of whether she was there or not. But she was coming back. She had to. She loved them too much.

At Larry's reminder for them to speed up their goodbyes, Peyton gave Lily one last kiss and told Lucas that she was proud of him. "I'm proud of you too Peyton. Thank you…for _everything_. I'll be seeing ya."

And then she was gone.

Lucas had the rest of his Sunday and every Peyton-less Sunday after that to think about the love they shared and to wonder if it truly was going to be forever.


	12. City of Blinding Lights

_**Chapter 11: City of Blinding Lights**_

Peyton Sawyer paced through the terminals of LAX airport with a glaring lack of urgency, surveying her surroundings and taking everything in. There was something about her new quarters that made her feel unhurried and patient, an odd sensation for the small town girl in a voluminous city of blinding lights, with millions of patrons and millions of opportunities.

Everything seemed to move in slow motion as Peyton walked towards the baggage claim with Larry following closely behind her, doing his best to dodge the speedy airport inhabitants. He felt like a fish out of water. They found their bags and headed towards the exit, where there were a crowd of people gathered, holding up signs with names written on them. It didn't take Peyton long to spot the "P. Sawyer and Papa Peyton" sign held up by a chicly dressed Brooke Davis, beaming from ear to ear as Peyton and Larry approached. Once they were close enough, Brooke dropped the sign and ran towards her best friend at a faster speed than someone wearing 4 inch heels should be able to.

"Peyton!!" Brooke squealed loudly and threw her arms around her best friend, who met her halfway, dropping her bags in the middle of the terminal.

Peyton sighed loudly, "I've missed you so much B. Davis."

"I've missed you too.

Peyton examined Brooke's appearance, "You look good."

Brooke looked at her audaciously, "Good? I was thinking gorgeous or stunning."

Peyton laughed, "Good to see you haven't changed."

"You mean in the three months we haven't seen each other?"

"Three months…really? It seems longer than that."

Larry finally caught up to the girls. "Hi Papa Peyton," Brooke pulled him into a hug, "Hey Brooke. It's good to see you again."

"So are you our chauffeur for today?"

"Goodness no…I am way too hot to be a chauffeur. But I will show you around LA," she winked.

Larry carried the suitcase to the car and they all hopped into Brooke's red Range Rover. Peyton wanted to check her new apartment out before Brooke took them around LA, so Brooke took them to the apartment complex located in Culver City on the west side of LA. It was a standard size one bedroom apartment, not extremely spacious but not tiny either. It was already furnished with a kitchen and one and a half bathrooms. "Wow this is perfect," Peyton said as she looked around her new domicile. "Plus it's not far from downtown LA where I'm going to be working."

"Are you sure you like it sweetheart?"

Peyton nodded and thanked him.

Brooke was still looking around, "this is a perfect spot to crash after a girl's night out or some weekend club hopping."

Larry raised his eyebrows. "Or not."

"I definitely need to spruce it up a bit…maybe some art will add some life to this place," she looked around, making a mental picture of where things should go.

"We'll work on that later," Brooke said hastily, "let's go get some dinner and catch up."

The three of them headed off to Ruth Chris' Steak House in Beverly Hills, Brooke's favorite restaurant. Peyton really enjoyed reconnecting with her best friend and spending time with her father. They ate delicious steak and spent hours talking and laughing about the olden days: sleepovers, burnt cookies and Brooke's "hot dad" crush on Larry. Peyton was thoroughly enjoying her brief time in LA, so much so that she hadn't thought much about Lucas or Lily…until she plopped down on her new bed later that night and closed her eyes. They were all she saw.

---

Lucas woke up Monday morning with a terrible headache. He didn't sleep much, Lily was fussy all night and no matter what he did, he couldn't calm her down. Today was the first day without Peyton and Lucas felt an array of emotions he couldn't begin to understand. But he didn't waste much time processing it all or allowing those emotions to torture him, Lily needed him and he had to start focusing on preparing for his assistant coaching job in September and finding a steady babysitter. Whitey gave him a roundabout figure of how much he'd be making as an assistant coach so Lucas was well aware that he was going to have to eventually find another source of income if he was going to have a babysitter for Lily. His job started in couple weeks, so he would have to start looking for a babysitter soon.

Although he already informed the Fullers that he would be keeping Lily, they still wanted a relationship with both he and Lily. Lucas was so surprised and warmed by their kindness, that he was determined to keep that family in his life and Lily's life. It was strange, even though the Fullers were initially Lily's adoptive suitors, Lucas felt them taking on a similar role with him. There certainly wasn't an abundance of parental type figures in his life and he wasn't going to pass on spending time with such a warm family.

"So Lucas, how you holding up?" John Fuller asked Lucas before taking a swig of his beer and flipping over a steak he had on the grill.

"I'll tell you if you give me one of those beers," Lucas joked.

"You got an ID?"

"Nevermind."

"So…?"

"I guess I'm doing okay. I talked to Peyton this morning and she seems like she's having a good time." Lucas smiled a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. John was quite perceptive and picked up on Lucas' sullen attitude immediately, "Basically you miss her a lot and now you're going to try to keep yourself busy in order to deflect the excruciating pain you're feeling because Peyton is the most important thing in the world and life's not fair," he said with feigned dramatics. Lucas couldn't help but laugh at how goofy John looked pretending to imitate an overly dramatic high school teenager.

"I'm just kidding around Lucas. I could tell that Peyton was important to you and in the short time we spent with her, she seemed really great. When is she coming back?"

"I don't know."

John raised his eyebrows, "Wow that's tough Luke. It would be so much easier if there was some kind of fixed target you could set your sights on."

"I can wait for her," Lucas said indubitably.

"Does she want you to wait for her?"

"I don't…probably. I mean she was the one who suggested that we take some time apart romantically while she's in LA but…I can't imagine dating anyone else right now."

"What about in a year or two?"

A frown formed on Lucas' face, "hopefully she won't be gone for multiple years."

"But you don't know?"

"Nope."

"Maybe you should ask her."

"But that's the thing…if she's doing well in LA, then I don't want her to come home on my account no matter how long she's there."

"But don't you think you would be asking too much of yourself to wait for years and years. I hope I'm not out of line here, but I'm just trying to play devil's advocate. You're a good looking kid, and you're only 18. Take it from an old man like me, you've got plenty of time."

"Old man? I mean you look old, but aren't you only 42?"

"Yeah he is, but he's about to hit that mid life crisis stage," April Fuller jibed as she walked past the two men, clutching Lily to her chest to protect her from the smoke. "Luke where is your diaper bag, I'm going to go change her."

"I left it on the kitchen table."

Once April left Lucas spoke continued with the conversation, "So you think I should play the field?"

"I think you should keep your options open," he winked.

John Fuller was the typical male. He smoked cigars, he loved football, basketball and hockey, he loved beer and he loved a good chat over grilled steaks. He had a way about him that made everything he said seem wise or worth at least some kind of thought.

"So you mentioned earlier that you need to start looking for a babysitter. When are you going to start?"

"As soon as possible I guess. My job starts in 2 ½ weeks."

"Well I have a niece who's coming up from Florida to go to UNC. She got a scholarship to go there but the scholarship doesn't cover room and board. When I talked to her on the phone last week, she said that she needs a job up here. Maybe she could babysit for you."

"Has she ever babysat before?"

"I don't know. I haven't seen her in a few years."

"When does she get to North Carolina?"

"In a couple of days."

"Well just give me a call when she gets here so I can meet her."

"Sure thing. You like your steak well done right?"

"Yeah," Lucas confirmed. "It looks great."

---

Peyton spent the first two days of her stay in LA, getting her apartment together with the help of her dad. They got a lot done and Peyton was really happy with how everything was progressing. Larry left for the airport after many hugs and thank you's from his daughter. They were as close as they've been in a long time. Peyton couldn't have made the transition from Tree Hill to LA without her dad. She was sad to see Larry go, but she promised Brooke she would have dinner with her later that night.

"Brooke, who is coming to dinner with us tonight?" Peyton was trying to balance the phone between her neck and her shoulder as she painted her toenails.

"It's a surprise."

"Okay so obviously you're bringing Jake," Peyton rolled her eyes at Brooke's attempt to be stealth.

"Don't roll your eyes at me. I can see you rolling your eyes through the phone."

"You know me so well."

"So what are you wearing tonight?"

"I don't know…clothes, maybe shoes. Why?"

"Because it's kind of a fancy restaurant and you're going to need shoes."

"Okay I'll wear shoes," Peyton said plainly.

"Nice try. Wear that green dress I made for you."

"Brooke that dress is way too short. What's the big deal about me dressing up?"

"Like I said it's a nice restaurant."

"I'm not dressing up for Jake, Brooke. I don't know why—"

"Okay fine, where one of those ugly ass flannel shirts for all I care. Just be ready by 7:30."

"Alright bye."

Peyton hung up the phone and walked to her closet. She picked out a nice black dress that covered her ass a little more than the dress Brooke made for her. He smiled at her best friend for a second. She was about to pick out some shoes when her phone rang. It was Lucas.

"Hey Luke. How are you?"

"I'm better now. I've been interviewing possible babysitting candidates all day."

"That sounds fun. But are you really going to trust someone to watch Lily for hours and hours without you being there? Remember how you acted when we left Lily with Haley for one night? And that's your best friend."

"I wasn't that bad. But I have to admit that I had a lot of fun that night pretending to be your boyfriend," he said wistfully.

Peyton sighed at the memory, "That was quite the dinner. I'm actually getting ready to go to dinner with Brooke and Jake at the moment."

"Jake huh? Whatever you do, don't wear that velvet dress," Lucas warned her jokingly.

"I wish you were here," she said earnestly.

"And I wish you were here to see some of these poor excuses for babysitting candidates," he laughed. "I'm actually about to meet with John's niece. She's coming up from Florida to go to UNC and she needs a job."

"That sounds promising. Tell the Fullers I said hi whenever you get a chance. How's Lily?"

"She's getting bigger every day. And she misses you."

There was a stubborn silence that passed between them that made Lucas regret telling Peyton that Lily missed her. "It's okay Peyt."

Peyton picked up a picture of the three of them that was sitting in a frame right beside her bed.

"Well I better let you get ready for your dinner. I'll talk to you later."

"Good luck with the babysitting interviews. Kiss Lily for me please."

"I will."

They never ended their phone conversations with "I love yous". They didn't really need to.

Peyton hung up the phone and slipped on her dress and heels. Brooke would be there in 20 minutes and she hadn't even begun to work on her hair. Oh fuck it I'm not doing my hair, she thought.

Peyton was standing outside when Brooke showed up in her SUV. She jumped out of the driver's seat to greet her and Peyton could see the back seat door open as well. Jake hopped out of the back seat and approached her. "It's so good to see you Peyton," he hugged her. "It's good to see you too Jake."

Brooke watched them from a few feet away, "Aww I'm having flashbacks to junior year." Peyton rolled her eyes as they pulled away from the hug.

"So you didn't wear the green dress?"

"Brooke, who is sitting in the front seat?" Peyton craned her neck to get a better view.

"He's my date."

Jake looked at the two best friends uneasily as if he was intruding on their conversation, "I'll go wait in the car."

Peyton looked at Brooke incredulously, "He's your date?! Brooke this looks a helluva like a double date."

"That's because it is."

Peyton placed her hand on her forehead. "Did you tell Jake that this was a date?"

"No, but I'm sure it won't be that hard for him to realize that it is," Brooke laughed.

"This isn't funny. Why did you have to drag me into this? Why couldn't you just go on a regular date?"

"Because this is much more fun. Plus I just met the guy so a double date is much safer."

Peyton sighed loudly. "I'll make it up to you, I promise."

"You better." They both climbed into the truck and headed off to the restaurant.

The car ride was pretty weird. Peyton kept noticing Jake subtly staring at her out of the corner of her eye. She finally faced him and attempted to make the car ride more comfortable, "what's going on Jagielski?"

"Nothing…you just…you just look different."

"Yeah I grew my hair out."

"I'm not just talking about your hair. You're like…glowing or something."

Peyton laughed, "it's probably just the city lights blinding you."

"Are you and Lucas together?" he forced out.

Wow he was being bold, she thought. "It's complicated," Peyton said diplomatically. Jake looked as though he wanted to ask another question but the car stopped and Peyton could see the valet parking guy signaling at Brooke. They all got out and headed inside. Apparently Brooke's date was some famous athlete's agent and they were getting some moderate celebrity treatment because of it.

They walked into the restaurant, each "couple" walking side by side with each respective male "date" pulling out the chairs for their respective female "date". She was going to kill Brooke.

---

Lucas sat on his couch with Lily in his arms. Sometimes he felt as though he held her too much. So much that she'd never learn to crawl or walk. It was silly, but Lucas often thought of crazy and weird things, and he was pretty sure that with some of their recent conversations, Haley probably thought he was even weirder than she's always thought he was. They talked about everything from ghosts to what it would have been like if they were conjoined twins. They also had a nice long conversation about clones and how creepy it would be to have a clone of themselves walking around. Lucas couldn't help but think about how nice it would be to have a spare Peyton that he could spend time with while the other one was in LA. Sure he was in desperate of sleep and maybe some of his bizarre thoughts reflected that, but he really did wish that he knew when he would see Peyton again. He sat and thought about this until the doorbell interrupted his thoughts. That must be John's niece, Claire, he thought.

He opened the door and nearly fainted when he saw the sight before him. A girl stood in front of him holding out her and introducing herself as Claire Fuller. She said some other things, but Lucas didn't hear a word. He was too busy wondering if he was dreaming or if someone was playing a cruel trick on him. The girl had curly blonde hair, brilliant green eyes, and lips that held a naturally petulant pout. She looked at him with confusion and he mirrored her look, although there might have been a little more awe in his gaze in her direction. This complete stranger, this girl that he'd never met, looked strikingly similar to one Peyton Sawyer. The resemblance went far beyond the typical claims of seeing someone that looks remotely similar to someone you know. Lucas couldn't find the words to speak, so he just stood there and gazed at her until she started to wonder what kinds of crazy people her uncle was associating with.


	13. With or Without You

**This chapter is kind of long. I haven't been updating as regularly as I used to so you guys deserve a longer chapter. School starts in a week so be patient with me on the updates. Hope you enjoy.**

_**Chapter 12: With or Without You**_

Okay so maybe Claire didn't look _exactly_ like Peyton but Lucas couldn't help but notice the physical mannerisms that she and Peyton shared, especially considering the amount of time he had spent watching Peyton Sawyer from afar…and up close.

"So are you going to let me in or are you just going to stand there and look at me as if I'm the last girl alive?"

She had a little attitude too.

"Umm…yeah sorry…come in."

"So what's with the zoo treatment?"

"You remind me of someone that's all."

"So she's pretty, but does this someone have a name?" Claire took a seat on the couch next to Lily's bassinet.

"Her name is Peyton. She's in LA right now working as an intern at a record label."

"What is she like?"

Lucas' face noticeably lit up. "She's smart, witty, supportive, compassionate, funny, she loves art and music, she has a huge heart, she's been through a lot but she's so strong…got the cutest southern accent and she—"

Claire cut him off, "I asked you what she was like, not for her annotated biography."

Lucas shrugged sheepishly.

"So you either really care about this girl or she's a helpless victim of your stalking."

"Do I look like a stalker?"

"Is that a trick question?"

Lucas smiled. "She and I used to date. We decided to take a break while she's out in LA but I'm still in love with her."

"She's your ex-girlfriend."

Lucas cringed at the term Claire used, "Not sure what this has to do with your interview but she's not my _ex-girlfriend_. I mean technically she is, but the term ex-girlfriend implies that she's in my past. But she's not."

"Unless she meets some fantastic, impressionable, music aficionado that sweeps her off her feet and makes her forget that you exist. Or unless you meet a sexy, free-spirited, fun loving college girl from Florida who babysits his sister."

"What makes you think you're going to get the job?" Lucas asked pointedly.

"What makes you think I was talking about me?" She countered.

Lucas shook his head in defeat.

"So you think I'm sexy huh?" Claire smiled smugly at Lucas.

"Nope, just really, really humble."

Claire looked up at him from her seat on the couch with faintly hooded eyes. He was cute. Really cute…especially with the little baby lying on his chest. Her aunt filled her in on Lucas' situation and she already knew about a lot about him. She certainly wasn't the "girlfriend" kind of girl, but she loved having close male friends as opposed to female friends. The problem was that it took her awhile to warm up a little bit. She wasn't very friendly by nature, which was strange considering the fact that she loved kids.

"So do I have the job or what?"

"I don't know. Do you have any experience? References perhaps. Are you a convicted felon? Do you have any mental illnesses?"

"I have two younger siblings that I practically raised because my parents were workaholics. I'm not a convicted felon…yet. And I don't have any mental illness although I do wonder what kind of nut case I am in order to voluntarily choose to live Tree Hill, North Carolina as opposed to Palm Beach, Florida. If you want a reference, you could call my parents but they're probably out celebrating the fact that I'm in another state."

"Umm...okay."

"But seriously I really want this job. And I know this is kind of a bold thing to ask, but I was wondering if I could live here and be able to babysit Lily around the clock if you need me."

Lucas raised his eyebrows.

"The thing is, I don't have room and board at UNC and it would kind of be a hassle living with my aunt and uncle."

"Why?"

"A) They're kind of strict and B) I don't have a car. Their house is farther away from my school than this place is."

Lucas' face still sported an uneasy expression.

"Of course if you let me live here, the babysitting will be free. Practically free. And you won't have to waste gas money or time dropping her off at my uncle's house."

Lucas just stood there and looked at the girl.

"Of course everything I just said is absolutely worthless if you're not going to give me the job," she laughed.

Lucas gave his famous squinty glare, "How about you give me until the end of this week, and I'll give you my decision then?"

"Okay," Claire nodded her head. She got up from her seat, "Is it okay if I hold her before I leave?"

"I'm not sure you want to do that. She starts screaming her head off when people she doesn't know try to hold her."

"That's the point. I want her to get to know me. So maybe next time she won't scream, she'll just cry loudly, and then after that she'll just whimper, and after that maybe I'll get her to drool on my hand."

Lucas laughed and handed Lily over to her, "I like your ambition."

He handed her over to Claire and Lily screamed, just like Lucas predicted. Claire didn't back down though and did her best to calm the screaming baby. But despite Lily's cold reception to Claire there was something calming about Claire's presence.

---

After dinner Brooke, Jake and Peyton all went back to Peyton's place. The dinner was an absolute disaster. Brooke's date was a narcissistic idiot that wouldn't shut the hell up the whole time they were at the restaurant, forcing Brooke to pull out the secret flask she had in her purse and forcing Jake and Peyton to busy themselves with a scintillating game of tic tac toe on one of Jake's napkins. Brooke was plastered by the time dinner was over so Peyton had to drive Brooke's date home.

"Okay, step. That's good Brooke, just 40 something more steps to go and we're there," Peyton said while trying to hold on to Brooke's right arm.

"I think this'll be easier," Jake picked Brooke up, placed her on his shoulder and walked up the stairs to Peyton's apartment.

Peyton opened the door for him. "Jake, take her to my room…it's on the left."

Jake laid Brooke down on Peyton's bed. "You got a bucket or something…just in case she launches."

Peyton grabbed a bucket out the bathroom and put it close to the edge of the bed. "Brooke, do you need to throw up honey?" She rubbed her back.

Brooke made a sound that resembled a grunt-like snort, and said, "Go". Or it could have been "no".

"Okay we'll be in the living room if you need us."

Peyton sighed as she plopped down on her couch and removed her shoes. "My toes are killing me. I haven't worn heels in awhile."

Jake sat down next to her, "Well you'd never know. You look beautiful tonight…if I haven't told you already."

"You did," Peyton confirmed.

"So what have you been up to since the last time I saw you…seven months ago?"

"It's been seven months?" Peyton furrowed her brows. Not ready to talk about her personal life yet she decided to deflect his question. "Why don't you start out by telling me where Jenny is and why you're out here in LA?"

"Jenny's with my cousins for the night. They live in Pasadena."

"Why aren't you in Savannah?"

"Nikki found some guy and now they're married. Her husband hates me, so she agreed to give me full custody of Jenny if I leave Savannah and promise her that she can get Jenny three months out of the year. I gladly accepted because in all honesty, I hated it there. So immediately after our arrangement, I left for LA. My cousin is a real estate developer and he was able to finance an apartment for me. I got my GED back in Savannah and now I work as an assistant manager at a restaurant called Gale's."

"How's Jenny?"

"She great. She'll be two in a couple of months. She's all over the place, walking around, and getting into things. She ran into a chair the other day and got a huge knot on her head. She's alright though. I'm so glad all that custody drama is over with. Now I feel like I can start my life, you know," Jake looked at Peyton.

"What about you? Last time I saw you, I was telling you to go find your heart in Tree Hill. Did you?"

"I did. It took me awhile to tell Lucas I was in love with him, but I finally did. We had been living together for a little while—"

At Jake's questioning glance, she explained that Karen had passed, leaving her and Keith's daughter Lily in the care of Lucas. She told him how she moved in with Lucas and supported him through his difficult time. She didn't talk much about how she and Lucas got together, but she made it clear that she still loved him even though they weren't together at the moment.

"So you two are on a break?"

"Yeah. We're going through a lot individually and we need this time. But I miss them a lot."

"You and Lily are really close?"

"Yeah we are. We bonded a lot this summer."

There was a long pause between them and they just sat on the couch staring out of window.

"You know you seem…different Peyton."

"Oh yeah I grew my hair out," she smiled and wrapped a piece of her hair around her index finger.

"No I don't mean that."

"Are you talking about me glowing or something…what you told me in the car?"

Jake nodded.

"Okay I'm not pregnant or anything," Peyton laughed soundly.

"Why is that so funny?" Jake inquired.

Peyton's face straightened up, "I found out that I can't have children," she said quietly.

"I'm sorry Peyton," his voice was sincerely apologetic. "I'm really sorry. You would have been a great mom…if and when you decided to have children. But you can adopt though. There are so many kids out there without a mom or without a mother who really wants them."

"I know."

"And there's also some single dads out there who would love your company."

"Oh really…do you know any?" Peyton played along.

Jake smiled at her and allowed his gaze to linger in her direction.

It was at this moment Peyton realized that Jake was going beyond simple friendly boundaries. She wasn't quite sure how to handle it. She couldn't have made it any clearer that she loved Lucas. "The flirting is cute Jake, but I don't really understand it," she said earnestly.

"I still care for you Peyton. You should know that."

"I know, but there's a reason you told me to leave Savannah. You did the right thing even though I was being stubborn. I'm just going to be honest Jake…I was in love with Lucas then and I am in love with him now."

"I know."

"But…"

"But I've realized that life's too short to be cautious and guarded. You don't have feelings for me anymore…I get it. But we're going to be living in the same city, and I just want us to be close again regardless of where your heart is. And if something happens it happens…but if it doesn't, then at least I got to spend some time with you."

Peyton looked piteously at Jake. "I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything. Honestly you can't imagine how many girls I've met in LA that don't hold my interest long enough for me to even consider taking them out on a date, let alone getting into a relationship with them. It's just nice to be around a woman I can talk to, as simple as it sounds."

"Where are you meeting all these girls?"

"I perform at cafes and bars from time to time."

"Of course."

"When do you start your internship?"

"In a few days. I'm kinda nervous, but it's an exciting type of nervousness."

"Well I should probably head back to my cousin's house to pick up Jenny."

"You need a ride?"

"Nah I'd rather take the bus. It's not that long of a ride."

Peyton walked him to the door, "bye Jake."

"Bye Peyton."

Peyton thought to call Lucas after Jake left, but it was 2 am in Tree Hill and she didn't want to wake him. She checked to see if Brooke was still alive and crawled into bed beside her. Just like old times.

---

Lucas lay on his bed at two o'clock in the morning looking at his phone. He couldn't sleep so he put on one of Peyton's album's that she left behind. _The Joshua Tree. _With or Without You was playing and although he used to think the song was overrated, the lyrics seemed to speak to him now, more so than anytime he'd ever listened to the song.

It was only 11:00 in LA but he didn't want Peyton to think he was checking up on her or that he was jealous that she was out with Jake. He was having trouble with giving Peyton the space that she needed while she was in LA, but at the same time letting her know that he wasn't going anywhere.

He woke up later that morning and checked on Lily. He held her in his arms but he noticed that she wasn't as responsive as she usually was. Her eyes were a pale grey and her nose was runny. When she threw up all over herself as Lucas was trying to figure out what was wrong with her, he knew then and there that she was sick. He wanted to panic, but he didn't allow himself to. He grabbed some baby wipes and cleaned Lily up before grabbing Lily's favorite blanket, a blanket that smelled like Peyton, and heading out the door.

He took Lily to the hospital and immediately called Peyton out of instinct.

"Lucas," she said in a groggy voice. "What's wrong honey?"

He felt a morsel of relief in hearing Peyton's endearment, "I'm sorry to wake you, but you were the first person I thought to call. Lily's sick. She's in the hospital."

"What?! Is she going to be okay? What are the doctors saying?"

"They're saying she has mild pneumonia but that her condition is worsening…something about a respiratory virus or something." His voice was noticeably high pitched and strained as he rambled on.

"Luke," she said in a feral, whispery tone, "calm down okay. Try and stay on the doctors to see how her condition is progressing. I'm leaving on the next flight out."

"Peyton you don't—"

"Just keep your phone on."

She hung up and he couldn't say he wasn't relieved. She was the only person that could make him feel better in this situation and he would be counting the seconds until he saw her.

She showed up at the hospital five hours later in a cab. She was wearing a sweatshirt, sweatpants and gym shoes, and she brought no luggage at all. She wasn't sure how long she was staying but she wasn't really thinking of anything other than Lily and Lucas at the time. She went up to the lady at the front desk and asked what room Lily Scott was in.

She walked to the room and found Lucas standing over Lily's little bed. There were all kinds of machines and wires around Lily; she was hooked up to some mechanism that seemed to be helping her breathe.

Lucas looked up and nearly fell over when he saw her standing there, simply dressed but still so beautiful. Neither of them said a word before ending up in each other's arms. Peyton cradled his head between the crook of her neck and her shoulder, allowing her hands to sweep through his hair. She didn't kiss him at the moment, feeling that it would be inappropriate in the current setting and situation. Plus she wasn't even sure if it was appropriate to kiss him at all when they weren't technically "together". But that could wait; she needed more information about Lily.

"What are the doctors saying now?"

"They're saying that there's fluid in her lungs and they want to give her this respiratory treatment. They said they have a better handle on what's ailing her, so there shouldn't be any serious complications."

"How long is she going to need the treatment?"

"They said she should be exponentially better by tomorrow night."

Peyton nodded and hugged Lucas again. "Have you had anything to eat today?"

She shook her head.

"You didn't have to rush here the way you did," Lucas mumbled sweetly against her hair, "but I'm so glad you're here." He hugged her tighter, enveloping her in his familiar masculine scent, peppering the top of her head with whisper soft kisses. She couldn't have felt safer with a steel barricade and fifty armed bodyguards around her. The rise and fall of his chest served as an anchor amongst a sea of uncertainty and indecision.

Lucas went out and got them something to eat while she waited with Lily. When Lucas got back they ate quietly, pausing only to take stolen looks at each other and Lily. Lucas took the opportunity to break the silence, "so when are you going back?" He looked up at her with boyishly, seemingly embarrassed at being so consumed with what should have been a trivial matter compared to Lily's health.

Peyton, caught off guard by his question but well expecting of it, answered, "Tomorrow night. My internship starts the morning after."

Lucas nodded looking as though he wanted to ask more questions.

"If you want to ask me something, just ask it." He wanted to ask her when she would be back in Tree Hill for good, but he decided against it for the moment.

He was about to say something when a woman whom Lucas had never seen walked through the door. "Hi are you Mr. Scott?"

"Yes," he answered suspiciously. "And you?"

"I'm Nancy from the billing department. Can I speak with you a moment?"

"Sure."

Peyton hadn't made any gestures to leave the room and Nancy looked at Lucas who nodded at her.

She took a seat next to Lucas and placed a clipboard on her lap. "Unfortunately because you don't have insurance, you'll have to pay the balance in full."

Peyton closed her eyes and shook her head.

"How much is it going to be?" Lucas asked.

"Well the respiratory treatment she's receiving along with the overnight stays and other accommodations, the total comes out to around 6,000 dollars." Nancy said a few other things about a mandatory down payment and payment plans. Lucas was left with a clipboard and an invoice. He couldn't wait until he started his job and was able to apply for health insurance. He definitely had Whitey to thank for that.

"Well I have a few grand saved up from money my dad gave me this summer," Peyton said immediately.

"No I've got it," he said absently.

Peyton sighed, "Luke you're going to have to pay a babysitter and pay for insurance once you get your job, plus the bigger Lily gets the more food you're going to need, etc. This is not the time to be proud."

"I'm not being proud, but I'm not the only one with expenses…living in LA can't be cheap and your internship can't be paying much."

"But I don't have a baby to take care of."

"No but you have yourself to care of yourself. I need you to do that for me…and for Lily."

"Why?"

"Because we need you back in one piece whenever you decide to come back home...whenever that is."

He looked at her and hesitantly asked, "When is that exactly?"

"The internship is six months long but…"

"But?"

"If I do well…if they offer me a job at their label, it could be longer than that."

"How much longer?"

"I don't know," she said quickly and slightly louder than she wanted to. "I'm sorry…I just can't have this talk right now."

"It's better to have it in person than over the phone…unless you're coming back at some point."

"I can't promise anything. I don't know when I'm going to be back in Tree Hill Luke."

"Not even for Christmas or anything?" he appealed.

"Lucas, it's too hard to keep coming back and leaving you and Lily all over again. Tomorrow's going to kill me and I just got here."

He took a deep breath, "I understand."

Peyton took his hand in hers and give it a small squeeze to comfort him.

"I need to talk to you about something. It's not about you coming back; it's about Lily's babysitter."

"Did you find one already?"

"I'm in the process of deciding, but my financial situation is making me lean towards a particular decision."

"What do you mean?"

"Yesterday I met Claire, she's John's niece that I told you about. She doesn't have room and board at UNC and she offered to babysit Lily for very little pay if I allow her to stay with me and Lily."

Peyton's eyes widened, conveying her astonishment at Lucas' newly proposed living arrangement. "Is this girl qualified or are you just thinking about what you can pay her?"

"You're not serious right?" Lucas spat incredulously. "I wouldn't compromise my sister because of money. She's babysat for her two younger siblings for most of her life, John's only told me good things about her and she loves children."

"You'll be comfortable with her living with you? Where is she going to sleep? I find it hard to believe that she'll want to live in a two bedroom house with a guy she hardly knows and a baby."

"She said she would sleep on the couch, and she might not know me, but how different is it from rooming with a girl in a dorm that she's never met?"

"Umm you're not a girl."

"Well that's pretty apparent, but it's always nice to hear," he laughed.

Peyton, however, was not amused.

"Look she doesn't have many choices as far as where she can live, and this way, I can help her and she can help me. And I know her family pretty well so it's not like she's a total stranger."

Peyton softened up her stance, "So is this what you really want?"

"Honestly if I had a lot of choices and some financial security, I probably wouldn't make this decision. But this is necessary for someone in my position."

"Okay," she mumbled after several seconds of silence.

Lucas pulled her into another hug. "I hope you're not worrying about being replaced," he said seriously. "Because you never will be," he put on finger on her chin and guided her to look him in the eyes.

"I can't help but feel a little weird about someone living there with you and Lily. I know it isn't the case, but it kind of feels like you're replacing me."

Lucas took in a breath and let it out slowly. "If you don't want her to live with us, I'll tell her no."

"I didn't say that. You have to do what you have to do. This is one of the reasons why we're taking a break. We're figuring things out. I can't be upset at you for trying to provide for Lily and make sure she's taken care of."

"Plus it's not like you don't have your own _single man with a baby_ replacement. How was your date with Jake last night?"

"It wasn't a date. It was two hours of Brooke's self-absorbed date talking everyone to death. I did get to hang out with Jake after we got back to my place," Peyton teased.

"Oh yeah," Lucas grinned.

"Uh huh, and it was so romantic. Me and Jake sitting in my living room absently listening to Brooke dry heave in my bedroom."

"And talking about how much he still loves you," Lucas added.

"How do you know?"

"You just don't get over Peyton Sawyer very easily," he winked at her.

"Yeah just remember that when Claire starts batting her eyelashes at you," Peyton pretended to be a fanatical school girl, giving him the dreamy eyed stare that she had seen so many other women give him.

Lucas laughed, "Claire isn't the bat-your-eyelashes kind of girl. Maybe you can meet her when the Fuller's come to visit Lily later tonight."

"That would be nice."

"Be prepared…she kind of looks like you."

Peyton laughed heartily at the thought of someone who looked like her living with Lucas and Lily just like she did. The irony was not lost on her.

"Everything's going to work out Peyt. I know it."

They talked for a few more hours while carefully watching over Lily. They talked and cuddled until they fell asleep beside Lily in the hospital room. Peyton was lying on a sofa using Lucas' lap as a pillow while Lucas sat on the sofa idly stroking her hair, humming the melody to _With or Without You_. The song was stuck in his head since earlier that morning and he couldn't stop singing it.

He hardly noticed when the Fuller's plus Claire appeared in the doorway of Lily's room. Claire just stood there watching Lucas and a girl, who had to be his beloved Peyton, on the couch. Lucas said she looked like her, but Peyton was definitely prettier, she thought. They looked so perfect together and Lucas looked so in love with this girl. This Peyton girl. And for a second she almost felt bad that she was going to have to get in between such a cute paradigm of puppy love.

Just for a second.


	14. Love Rescue Me

**Sorry for the wait. It's a long chapter so I hope that makes up for it a little. Hope you enjoy.**

_Seven months later…_

_**Chapter 13: Love Rescue Me**_

Peyton opened her eyes and immediately felt a nauseating, throbbing pain that forced her to wonder if her temples would explode if she moved her head the slightest inch. She hadn't planned on drinking so heavily, but of course things didn't turn out the way she initially planned. It was her 19th birthday the night before and Brooke was determined to give her a night to remember. Not only did she rent out an entire club for the night, but she also rounded up some people from Peyton's job and they were able to get Brandon Boyd from Incubus to sing some songs for her.

It was quite the night to say the least; complete with an acoustic serenade of _Stellar, _while Peyton sat on stage fighting back embarrassment as a shirtless Brandon crooned and sealed the performance with a happy birthday salutation.

She finally rolled out of bed at 2pm; it was a Saturday so she didn't have to go to work. She took a long glance at a picture of Lucas that sat on her mantel before immediately walking over to her laptop and sitting down at her desk. A couple of weeks ago the two blondes decided that emailing would work better than the telephone calls. Their hectic schedules and the massive time difference was really becoming a nuisance in their efforts to communicate. But truth be told, Peyton loved the e-mail idea. There was something so sexy about reading Lucas' words.

When she opened her inbox and saw the e-mail from Lucas entitled _19 Things I Love About You_, the throbbing in her head somewhat subsided and shot down her body until she felt it percolating between the hollow of her thighs. A Brandon Boyd serenade had nothing on a Lucas e-mail.

The email was rather long but Peyton loved every bit of it. From 1 to 19, ranging in descending order of triviality, Lucas poured his heart out to her, expressing everything he loved about her from her adorably infectious laugh to the purity of her heart. He ended the e-mail by thanking Peyton for changing his life before apologizing to her for the cheesiness of the e-mail.

God she missed him…_terribly_.

After wiping away a few tears from her face, she began typing him a response e-mail.

---

An annoyed Claire Fuller sat at a table in the UNC library. She had Lily sitting on her lap, and she should have been studying for her Anthropology exam but she couldn't stop thinking about Lucas. Basketball season was over and Lucas was working in the maintenance department at an auto garage in Brunswick County. The job paid pretty well and Lucas definitely needed the financial security.

Claire's annoyance stemmed from the fact that in a span of two hours, Lucas texted her five times to see if Peyton sent him an e-mail. His laptop crashed a week earlier and he entrusted Claire with access to his email account for the purpose of printing out Peyton's e-mails for him to read when he got off of work since they didn't have internet access back at the house. Claire made a promise that she wouldn't read the e-mails, so Lucas was satisfied with their arrangement.

They had developed a semblance of a friendship over the first seven months of her stay. They were as close as Lucas would allow, knowing that Claire's stay was temporary. The plan was for Claire to stay for her freshman year only and by her sophomore year, she would stay on campus while Lucas found another babysitting alternative.

Claire was many things, and perceptive was definitely one of them. She could certainly tell that Lucas was making an effort to keep their relationship somewhat impersonal, but she did everything in her power to change his stance. She wasn't trying to be his girlfriend or anything, she was just trying to get him to lighten up and have some fun while Peyton was gone.

From what she was hearing, Peyton was having some fun of her own in LA, partying with her best friend and hanging around with her ex-boyfriend. Lucas was a handsome kid, and an overall great catch in her opinion, so it bothered her that he was so hung up on some chick that he had just started dating before _she_ broke it off and moved across the country. It reminded her so much of her past relationship with a guy back home that she was still bitter about. He was two years older than her and he left for college while she was a junior in high school. For two years she didn't have any fun without him, even breaking her neck to keep in contact with him while he was in NY, only to have him tell her to stop calling him right after she graduated high school.

It was then that she decided she wasn't going to date anymore. And she was happy being single. She was meeting a lot of new people in college and experiencing everything that she didn't allow herself to experience in that two years that she lost waiting for that loser. But of all the people she had met since being in North Carolina, Lucas, even in his state of pathetic Peyton withdrawal, certainly intrigued her more than anyone. However, from her perspective, his difficulties in letting himself go definitely rested in his refusal to let Peyton go.

With that in mind, she sent Lucas yet another text confirming that Peyton had not replied to his e-mail.

Eight days later, and there was still no word from Peyton.

Lucas took Claire's advice and decided not to call Peyton's phone during those seven days even though it killed him to do so.

"You're not her boyfriend," she said plainly.

"But what if something's wrong with her or what if something happened?" he appealed.

"There's nothing wrong with her," Claire responded somewhat definitively for someone who didn't know what was going on with Peyton as much as Lucas did. He hit her with a quizzical stare.

She cleaned it up, "I mean…I'm sure she's just having fun or just really busy with work."

Lucas sighed and placed his hand on the back of his neck. "I guess you're right. I'm not her boyfriend and she doesn't have to check in with me."

"Exactly."

Claire smiled and playfully bounced Lily on her knee. The little girl had warmed up to Claire considerably in the seven month span. It was a feat that Claire felt exceedingly grateful for. She had grown to care about Lily as much as she did about her own brother and sister. She couldn't imagine having kids of her own, partially because she couldn't see herself being in a relationship, but she certainly would not be opposed to adopting someday just like her aunt and uncle were poised to do.

Lucas looked at Claire humorously, "You know it's hard to believe that you've been living here twice as long as Peyton stayed here."

"Maybe it's probably because you and Peyton acted like a married couple while she was here."

"No we didn't," he chuckled.

"Maybe you're right, but I guarantee that if you start sleeping with me and cooking my meals, it'll feel as though I've been here forever," she added.

She paused and then smiled graciously in Lucas' direction, "But seriously, I'm going to miss being around you and Lily once the school year is over."

"We'll miss you too," he said sweetly. "But we'll still see you whenever your uncle has barbeques or whatever other events they plan. The Fullers have been incredibly supportive and almost like second parents, so that means that you and I are like family," he reasoned.

Claire rolled her eyes, "how about we slow down a bit on the family declarations? I've got enough family members back in Florida."

Lucas grabbed Lily out of her lap, "How come you never talk about them?"

"I guess I'm just bitter. I practically raised my two younger siblings and never felt like it was appreciated. Not from them and not from my parents. It's weird because I feel more appreciation from you for helping out with Lily, and I'm getting a place to stay in return."

After a beat, Lucas shrugged boyishly, "I'm sorry."

"You've got a real gift with words there."

Lucas smiled the first real genuine smile she'd seen since her stay at his house. She wished she could see it more. In fact, after seeing that smile, she wished she wasn't leaving him after the school year was complete.

"So I have a suggestion," she turned her body completely towards Lucas and Lily.

"Should I be afraid?"

"It depends. Starting tonight is the beginning of Freak Week, a week of non-stop partying before students start preparing for exams and final projects."

"Freak Week?!" Lucas drawled out. "You're not serious, are you?"

"As serious as a heart attack."

Lucas raised his eyebrows comically, "well you have fun with that."

"You're going out with me."

"No I'm not. I have Lily to take care of."

"Actually my aunt and uncle are expecting us to drop Lily off within the next three hours so she can stay the night," she smiled sweetly.

"We're you planning on telling me that information at some point?"

"At some point."

"I'm not really in the partying mood, so I'll just have a quiet night at home by myself and you can go out and be a freak this week."

"Lemme guess, you're going to read _The Great Gatsby_ or _The Winter of Our Discontent _for the fiftieth time?"

"Maybe."

"Or maybe you're going to think about calling Peyton for the millionth time?"

Lucas blew out a breath, "maybe."

"Do yourself a favor and take a night for yourself without torturing yourself over a girl that—"

"Okay I get it," his voiced raised a few octaves, "she has her own life in LA and she's not going to wait around for me, so I shouldn't wait around for her, right?"

"That's the spirit," she belted out triumphantly.

"Not really. Where is this party anyway?"

"It's at my friend's house."

"A house party?!? Sounds…amusing," he said sardonically. "Will there be kegs and liquid ecstasy?"

"Yeah but make sure you take the stick out of your ass before you walk in the door. Oh and if you see underage drinking, don't call the cops."

Lucas threw her a spurious smile and twisted his neck in a way to show that he wasn't really in accordance with the idea. After an extremely drawn out pause and a "pretty pretty please" from Claire, complete with a protruding bottom lip that reminded him of Peyton in that particular moment, Lucas finally acquiesced, "Alright I'll go."

"Great. It'll be good for you, I promise."

So it was settled, Lucas Scott was going to a party.

---

Peyton impatiently banged on the copy machine for fifth time, more ready than ever to haul the damn thing out of the window. Work was becoming more and more of a chore and the only thing she loved about work was seeing her co-workers…at least the ones that didn't boss her around and treat her like a 12 year old kid.

It had been four days since she sent her e-mail to Lucas and she got nothing in return. She told herself that Lucas was just really busy with Lily and his job and he would respond when he had the time. She couldn't be mad at him; she herself was swamped with obligations. Later that night she was meeting up with a band she had heard perform a week earlier. They were really talented and they were also unsigned. Peyton couldn't wait to hand their demo to her boss to show him what an eye she had for talent. Jake was still working on getting studio time to make his demo and Peyton needed to find some new acts in the mean time.

There were three of them in an unnamed band: Van, Travis and Curt. Calling them a gregarious group of guys was an understatement to say the least. She had a meeting with them after work and if she was being completely honest with herself, she was really looking forward to hanging out with them.

After she finished counting down the seconds until her workday was over, she grabbed her purse and ran out the mailroom. She absolutely had grown to despise the building in which she worked; she felt the building was stifling her, keeping her from the essence and very core of her passion for music.

There was something about being around a group of guys that shared her passion and her appreciation, not only for music, but for life. These guys were crammed into a one bedroom apartment, living off of money from gigs, and eating cheap takeout every night. There was something about their hunger, their fervor, that made Peyton feel alive and invigorated, something she hadn't felt in seven months.

Peyton met up with the boys at a lounge in LA. She was doing her best to keep her mind off of Lucas and their growing separation. As much as she tried to rationalize Lucas' lack of communication and attribute it to him being busy, she couldn't help but feel disappointed and feel as though she was slowly fading from his life.

---

"Okay are you ready yet?" Claire yelled through the bathroom door.

Lucas opened the door, "I mean I have clothes on and Lily's all ready, but don't parties start at like 11:00 or midnight?" He looked at his wristwatch, "It's barely 8 o'clock."

"What if I told you we were going somewhere before the party?" She said with a raise of her eyebrow.

"I'd tell you that I don't like surprises," Lucas said rather abruptly.

"Maybe that's your problem. You're predictable and…boring. You're like a zombie."

"And this observation is based on--?"

"I don't know many 18 year old boys that I would have to beg to go to a college party."

"Do you know any 18 year old boys that support themselves and support a ten month old baby?"

"No but that's not the point. You're letting your situation define you, prevent you from living your life and doing things that 18 year olds should do. Be spontaneous, be a little reckless. Lily is not going to turn into little orphan Lily if you go out to dinner with me and attend a college party."

"Do you get all those little motivational speeches off of a website or do you think of this stuff all on your own?"

"Are you going or not?" She said impatiently.

Lucas looked at her pointedly and then softened his stance, "Yeah I'll go I guess," he said petulantly.

She nodded her head victoriously and turned towards him, "So the motivational speech worked, huh?

"No, I'm just starving and dinner sounds really good."

They dropped Lily off at John and April's before heading to a restaurant near the Riverwalk. They were both reluctant to talk for awhile after they ordered their meals. Of course it was Claire who broke the silence, "I know I've been riding you about being a dull, stick-in-the-mud, but honestly I'm jealous of you."

Lucas looked at her incredulously. "Me? Why would you be jealous of me?"

"You're so…" she motioned with her hands, signaling that she was trying to find the right word, "together."

"Together?! I work two seasonal jobs and I'm barely keeping my head above water."

"I'm not talking about job stability. I'm talking about the way you handle yourself. You're such an adult. You always think things through and you're responsible, and conscientious; you're always thinking about Lily and everyone but yourself. You act more like an adult than I ever did."

"But I thought you enjoyed being young and careless."

"I do but—"

"But?"

"There's an emptiness that I feel sometimes. I look at you and Lily and it becomes more apparent."

"So why don't you just give up being a freak during the week and start opening yourself up to some commitments? I'm not even talking about kids, just a relationship…something that's going to last more than a night."

Claire sighed, "I don't know. I think it's because I don't have faith in myself. Commitments have always been my downfall. It's probably why I love being Lily's babysitter. I can have it both ways…I can be the responsible adult during the day and be the reckless teen at night. I'm afraid of being tied down and then possibly realizing that it's not what I want. But you can't just suddenly change your mind and decide you don't want your kid," she laughed.

Lucas smiled, "I have a hard time believing that you wouldn't want your own kid or a child that depends on you. I can see what you mean about commitments but it's different when you're actually placed in a situation where you need to be an adult. It's not nearly as paradoxical as you make it sound."

"So you never have any desires to be free of your responsibilities?"

"I never really think about it. I just do what I need to do to take care of her. Besides, I did all of that in high school. I've gone to all the parties, I've gotten drunk, I've cheated on my girlfriend, I've had pregnancy scares—"

"You and Peyton?"

"No…me and Peyton's best friend."

"You cheated on Peyton?"

"No I cheated on her best friend…with Peyton," Lucas said sheepishly.

"Wow. I can't imagine you cheating on your girlfriend, let alone getting drunk."

"You'll probably change your tune by the time the party is over," he smirked.

"Is Lucas Scott getting drunk tonight?" She gasped, with mock seriousness.

"Maybe. You probably won't believe this but I'm excited about tonight. Even though it sounds totally contradictory to what I just told you, it will be nice to get away from everything for just _one_ night."

"By everything you mean Peyton?"

Lucas didn't answer the question, he just looked around, picking at his dinner napkin. Claire took the hint and began staring around the restaurant at the different tables and the occupants at the tables. All she saw was couples. Once again she had to broach the conversation.

"Do you see yourself with a family down the road? Outside of just you and Lily, I mean. A wife, in-laws, a couple Luke Jr.'s running around?"

Lucas thought about the fact that Peyton couldn't have children, "Maybe not Luke Jr.'s, per se, but I'd love to make my family bigger someday. I'd love to be a father and a husband. I could be so happy with that life."

She looked up and stared directly at his face, subtly analyzing its appearance. She couldn't believe it but she was sure in that moment she was beginning to fall for him. Not just in the cute crush kind of way, but it was starting to get serious. Sure it was stupid and sure she knew that when Lucas mentioned being a father and a husband, he had Peyton in mind. All she could do was enjoy the time they were spending together at the moment.

---

Lucas looked around the apartment he was in, hoping to find something that entertained him. He was a couple of beers in, but he wasn't having any fun. He didn't know anyone outside of Claire at the party, and she was doing her own thing talking to some of her classmates. He actually scanned the room and she was nowhere to be found. Lucas happened to look around a little more, and his eyes landed on a girl with red hair that looked vaguely familiar. It was Chelsea from Peyton's art group. She walked up to Lucas and they exchanged pleasantries. Lucas and Chelsea inquired about Adam and Peyton respectively, leading to a hilarious conversation about the dinner they had together over the summer. Claire was watching the whole thing from the corner of the party, the jealousy starting to consume her, despite the effort she was making to stop feeling the way the felt about him. She saw him get up from his spot on the couch next to Chelsea and walk outside. She couldn't help but feel some relief that Chelsea wasn't capturing his attention.

Lucas walked outside because talking about Peyton with Chelsea was starting to make him want to call her. Plus Chelsea was starting to bore him when she attempted to switch subjects and talk about her classes. He could talk about Peyton all day, but the history of industrial art was about the most boring thing he'd ever heard.

He stood outside and after a minute of debating, he finally mustered up the courage to call her. He dialed her number, each press of the button making him more and more nervous. It rang and rang and rang…no answer. Shit. He sat on the curb for a half an hour staring at the screen of his phone. It never rang.

Claire was waiting by the door when he finally walked back into the house.

"Where's the hard liquor?" He asked. His face was visibly sunken and his expression held one of grave disappointment.

She gave him a solemn, sympathetic look, handed him a cup and the rest of the night was a blur.

He opened his eyes the next morning and immediately felt a throbbing, nauseating pain that caused him to wonder what the hell he drank the night before. He pulled himself out of bed and went to the kitchen to down some water and bagels. He wanted to sober up before he went to pick up Lily. He showered and got completely dressed, leaving a sleeping Claire on the couch. On the way to the Fuller's he took the opportunity to think about Peyton. He thought about the conversation he had with Claire and some of the things she said. Despite her brash outlook, she definitely had some valid points.

He had made a decision regarding Peyton and it was probably one of the biggest decisions he'd ever have to make. Lucas realized that he needed to make this decision for both he and Peyton so they could move forward with their lives. It had to be done.

---

Peyton was sure the whole apartment complex heard her scream some profanities when she finally got back home after a night out with the band. She left her phone at home, and of course the one night she doesn't have her phone with her, is the one night Lucas calls. It was 4am in LA so that meant it was 7am in Tree Hill. She told herself she would wait a little while longer to call him. She hadn't spoken to him in so long and she wanted to make sure he was awake and alert. She wanted so badly to hear his voice and talk to him about why he didn't answer her emails. She wanted to know where they stood, and if he still believed in their future as much as she did. She wanted to tell him how much she missed him and how she couldn't _truly _be happy in LA without him.

She thought over what she was going to say and a couple hours later, she called his phone. He answered, and she could hear him breathing rather harshly. He seemed to be walking somewhere.

"Lucas?! Lucas! Can you hear me?" Peyton spoke directly into the receiver.

The noise subsided, "Yes I can hear you."

"Lucas I miss you," she said without offering much introduction to the phone call. "I know we haven't been on the same page for awhile but—"

"Peyton we need to talk." He said those words without frills, without much emotion and Peyton was starting to feel that this wasn't going to be the conversation she hoped it would be. Her heart began slamming in her chest, anticipating the worst but hoping for the best, she took a slow, deep breath to calm herself down and prepare for whatever was next.

"Okay," she said cautiously. "We need to talk about what?"

Before he could answer, there was a knock on her door. "Hold on one second okay."

She put on a robe and headed towards the door. She looked through the peephole and couldn't believe her eyes. Her heart stopped when she opened her door to find Lucas standing in front of her, with Lily in his arms and luggage at his side. They seemed to be standing there forever before he spoke, Peyton's eyes surveying every part of his face, locking her gaze into his bright cerulean eyes, wet with unshed tears, as wide open as she'd seen in a long time.

"We need to talk about the smog in LA, because I should not be this tired, walking up a simple flight of stairs."

A tear fell down Peyton's face and it barely rolled down her cheek before Lucas' lips found hers and she could taste the salt of his own tears.

**Sorry there wasn't more Peyton in this chapter. The next chapter will definitely make up for it.**


	15. When Love Comes To Town

**So a five month hiatus sucks. Sorry guys. First semester of junior year of college was really a pain. But I should be updating more regularly for sure. There's only about four more chapters though. Hope you enjoy. **

_**Chapter 14: When Love Comes To Town**_

She was a goddess.

As she glided towards him in her beautiful white gown, a strapless creation that accented her porcelain skin to perfection, that's all he could think about. Her head was held high to the heavens as she moved, her hair curled and swept up off of her long neck with tiny tendrils of silken hair cascading down the sides of her face, partially shielding her crystalline eyes. She seemed so proud in that moment; she was almost strutting down the aisle. Her focus was on none other than her husband -to-be, so ready was she to stand in front of the man of her dreams and start the rest of what she was sure to be an incredible life.

Before he knew it, she was standing in front of him, their hands and eyes locked—the tangible and metaphorical symbols of their innumerable intangible bonds—souls and hearts in identical rhythm with one another. He could see her eyes fill with moisture as the minister began speaking and he hoped he would be able to keep it together. He followed her gaze to his little sister in the front row of the congregation as she spoke her vows. They opted for traditional vows but Lucas had something up his sleeve.

Once she finished her vows and proudly slipped the wedding band on his finger, he paused and informed her that his vows were written, pulled straight from the pages of his second book that she was not aware he was writing. Her eyes widened with surprise and humble acceptance at his admission that his second book was a manifestation of his undying love for her. _Direction. Beauty. Meaning…_he began, feeling his eyes fill and his heart burst at the sight of her face as she listened intently to every word he spoke. He spoke again, feeling her hands tread through his hair and her lips graze the tip of his nose….

"Lucas."

"Lucas, wake up sweetie," he heard a gentle voice whisper in his ear. He opened his eyes slowly, realizing that Peyton was not in a white dress; she was in a green robe and he nearly cried when he realized that his dream was…only a dream. She could see disappointment etched on his face as he opened his eyes and she couldn't help but feel disappointment herself. He was supposed to be happy to wake up next to her.

"I might not be the most graceful looking woman in the morning, but you could at least pretend that you're somewhat excited to see me after seven months," she said, slightly in jest.

Lucas sat up and grabbed her hands, "Oh Peyt I'm so sorry. I am happy to see you, _so happy_, I was just having this _incredible _dream and---

"Oh really?" Peyton said mischievously, slipping her hands teasingly underneath his shirt, running them up and down his torso.

He laughed and kissed the palm of her hand, "It was a G-rated dream thank you very much. R-rated dreams are more your specialty, if I remember correctly."

Her cheeks flared at the embarrassing memory and he chuckled at her cuteness.

"So what was the dream about?" she implored.

"The future," he said vaguely.

"You're not going to be specific?"

"I don't want to jinx it."

She looked confused but he just kissed her and held her close, relishing in the feel of having her back in his arms. She belonged there, without question; he wasn't so sure of anything in his life.

"Is Lily still asleep?"

"Yeah she is."

"I can't tell you how adorable it is that you have a spare crib in your apartment," he smiled against her face, kissing her hair, "I guess you just needed to be prepared in case some stalker ex-boyfriend came to your apartment, unannounced, at nine in the morning with a baby in tow."

She looked up and gave him a sly grin. "If Jake or Nathan show up at my apartment at nine in the morning with Jamie or Jenny, unannounced, there's going to be serious problems."

"Well considering the fact that you let me kiss you until I fell asleep without any problems, I'd like to know what makes me and Lily the exception to the rule," he said with a smile.

"For starters," she leaned up closer to his face and whispered softly, "you're not my _ex_-boyfriend…"

His expression visibly brightened and she couldn't help but be turned on by how adorable he looked. She closed the small gap of space between their lips with lightening speed, passionately moving her lips against his, a repeat of the reunion kiss they shared hours ago. The kiss that they had been waiting months and months for, the kiss that made Lucas leave his luggage in the hallway of the apartment complex, a kiss that made him temporarily forget that he had a one year old in his arms.

It was only after Peyton forced herself to break up the kiss that Lucas realized Peyton's joyful tears were not only for him, but for seeing Lily again, the little girl that had stolen her heart in just four months. She grabbed the little girl out of the crook of his arm and held her close to her chest, pressing kisses to every inch of her face. Lucas was worried that Lily might not be responsive to Peyton simply because of how long it had been since she'd seen Peyton, but that wasn't the case. Trivial things like time couldn't touch the bond they had and Lucas was almost embarrassed that he even spent a second worried about it.

They spent an hour together, just the three of them, before Lily's sleepy eyes led Peyton to pull out the crib in her closet that she so desperately hoped she'd get to use.

She placed a sleeping Lily inside the crib and kissed her forehead.

Lucas couldn't believe she had a spare crib in her closet. A freaking crib. God he loved this woman.

So touched by the thought of Peyton preparing and hoping for a visit from he and Lily, he marched over to her and began kissing her senseless, preventing her from asking any questions that he knew were on the tip of her tongue.

"Luke, what made you decide---?"

He kissed her once.

"How long are you goin---?"

He kissed her twice.

"What about Cla---?"

He kissed her three times, the third time a bit more forceful and passionate than the first two leaving her breathless and satiated. She finally said "fuck it" and led him to the bedroom. They made out a little longer and eventually she let him fall asleep in her arms, realizing that they could make love at another time. Despite his insistence that just seeing her was enough to have him wide awake, she could tell that the everyday demands of raising a baby and working tirelessly, was wearing on him.

But after he'd woken up from his nap, she wondered just how exhausted he was. After waking up from his fantasy wedding reverie and hearing Peyton confirm that they were not in fact "exes", he felt rejuvenated, to say the least. As soon as Peyton's lips touched his, every nerve in his body was alive. Her touch felt fucking incredible, stirring his senses in a way that he had not felt in a very long time. Too long.

"I missed you so much Luke," she murmured as he applied voracious lips to some of his favorite places on her body. She sat above him, straddling his lap and rocking forward, grappling at the headboard to keep her balance.

"Peyton you are…so incredible," he groaned. He could feel one of her hands trail down his abdomen to the front of his jeans to unclasp his belt and unbutton his pants. Before he could even allow himself to process how much he approved of what she was about to do, the piercing sound of Lily's cries filled the room.

"Dammit," he cursed. Peyton laughed, of course, cruelly thrusting her hips forward one final time before jumping off of his lap to retrieve Lily.

"You have no idea how much you are going to pay for that." He could hear her giggle as she left the room. He could hear Lily giggle as Peyton made her way over to Lily's crib and made a face at her.

It doesn't get much better than that.

---

After Lucas and Peyton got their hormones in check, Peyton cooked a late morning Sunday breakfast, similar to the one she cooked for Lucas on the day she left Tree Hill, seven months ago. Lucas helped out with breakfast, laughing and making jokes, humoring his two girls.

It was a beautiful day outside and Peyton took both he and Lily to the rooftop of her apartment complex, a place she loved to sit and think whenever she was in need of some time alone. She couldn't help but realize how much her time was better spent when she had Lucas and Lily by her side.

As much as she loved the peace and quiet time, she just had to broach some questions after the whirlwind of a morning she just had.

"Luke, how long are you and Lily staying?"

He was about to speak when her cell phone rang. She sighed loudly, clearly annoyed at being interrupted during such an important conversation. She flipped her phone open without even looking at the caller id.

"Hello." She all but growled.

"Umm I'm sorry should I call back another time?"

"No Jake, that's fine. What's up?" She eyed Lucas slowly as he looked off in the distance.

"I just wanted to make sure that we still have plans to go to Gale's tonight since I'm performing. Brooke is on her way to get Jenny from my house. So can I pick you up around seven?"

"Yeah…but Jake there's something---"

"I'm sorry Peyton, I have to go. Jenny just hurt herself trying to climb on top of my kitchen counter. See you tonight."

"Jake! Dammit, he hung up."

Lucas looked at Peyton hesitantly, "Did you have something to tell him?"

"Yeah I did. I wanted to tell him that you were in town."

"Why do you need to tell him?"

"Because he's coming here at seven o'clock because he's playing a set at the restaurant he works for, and I told him I would go watch him play."

Lucas' eyebrows raised slightly, "So this is like a date?"

She abruptly corrected him, "No! No, this isn't a date."

"So why is he picking you up? Can't you just meet him there?"

"Lucas," Peyton sighed. "I really hope you're not---"

"I'm not jealous Peyton. I'm just curious, that's all. It's not a big deal. Clearly you have a life, and things just aren't going to stop just because I'm in town. You and Jake have fun tonight; I'll stay at your apartment with Lily."

"Actually I was thinking that you can go with us. Brooke is babysitting Jenny, so I'll call her and tell her to just come to my apartment and watch Lily too."

"Are you sure Jake would be okay with that?"

"Of course he would."

Lucas looked at her with skepticism.

"Okay," she sighed, "I don't really know if he'll be okay with it, but even if he's not, it doesn't really matter."

"So Jake still has a thing for you, huh?"

"Maybe. But I've been pretty clear with him about what I want us to be. Friends. Nothing more, nothing less. I'm going to the show mainly because I'm working on getting Jake signed, and perhaps getting a job as a junior A&R executive. They're looking to replace a few people at the label."

"That sounds like quite an opportunity, Peyton. I really hope you get that job," he leaned over and kissed her gently.

"Thanks. There's going to be a lot of important people watching Jake and another band I'm trying to get signed so tonight is a big deal."

"Maybe I shouldn't come then. I don't want to be a distraction."

"Luke, you're coming. I'm about to call Brooke and tell her that you're here. She's going to be thrilled to know that's she's getting baby double duty." Peyton smiled in Lucas' direction, but he was staring off into space again. She didn't like that.

"Luke, whatever it is you're thinking about, just stop. Tonight is going to be great." She lightly grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and pulled him into the softest, sweetest kiss he'd ever experienced.

"So are you going to answer my question about when you're leaving me?"

"Can I give you that answer after the night is over?" he asked.

Peyton looked like she wanted to ask another question and he kissed her again.

"Okay this habit you've got of kissing me to keep me quiet, is going to get old really quickly," she joked.

He kissed her again. She closed her eyes and he could feel her melting into the kiss, "And when I say quickly, I mean never."

"That's what I thought," he murmured against her lips.

---

It didn't take long for Lucas to get ready although sharing the bathroom with Peyton was pretty fun. Her bathroom was small and well-kempt, with neat little blue tiles and a nice shower head fixture. There was also a translucent shower curtain that Peyton made sure to take advantage of. Reminded of the time when she walked in on a naked Lucas in his bathroom, she announced her presence in the bathroom before she took a peak around the shower curtain.

"Hey!"

Peyton giggled, "I think your ass could use some LA sun."

He peaked around the curtain, "Why? It's not like my ass needs to look good for anyone. No one's gonna see it," he teased.

"We'll see about that," she quirked an eyebrow.

When he finished his shower and stepped out of the tub, he blindly reached for his towel, surprised that Peyton had not taken the towel from where it hung. He was also surprised to find that Peyton was already undressed and standing by the sink; ready to start her shower. Lucas stopped dead in his tracks and just stared.

"So what were you saying about no one seeing your ass?" she said in mock seriousness.

The sight of her standing there in all her naked glory had him flustered beyond belief. "Umm…what?"

"You're blocking the shower sweetie."

"You are a tease," he groaned.

She side stepped him and eased into the shower before saying, "Make sure you keep that towel wrapped tightly around your waist. Luke Jr. seems to be on the move."

She laughed loudly and gave him a pat on the back. When he stepped out of the bathroom, he surveyed the room, noticing a sleeping Lily in her crib, and---what the hell! Brooke Davis was sitting on the couch with a little blonde-haired girl that had to be Jenny.

"Well would you look at that? I didn't see my first half-naked boy until I was thirteen. Jenny, my darling, you are waaaaay ahead of the curve."

An embarrassed Lucas ran out of the living room and into Peyton's bedroom to change, but not before calling Brooke a pervert.

She shrugged her shoulders, "I've been called worse."

Once he was fully clothed and under control, Lucas stepped out of the bedroom and marched up to Brooke giving her a firm hug.

"It's good to see you again Brooke."

"It's good to see you too Luke. It's been way too long," she looked down at the crotch of his pants, "And I see you've got your little guy under control."

Lucas turned beet red. "Nothing gets passed you Brooke."

"Well nothing below the waist," she smirked.

"Does Peyton know you're flirting with her boyfriend?"

"Nope. Because A) she doesn't have one and B) she doesn't know I'm here." Lucas looked at her with confusion. "I have a key."

Lucas corrected her, "Well A) she does have a boyfriend as of three hours ago and B) does she give all her friends a key?"

"No. Just me and Jake."

"Jake has a key!" Lucas shouted.

Peyton opened the door in time to hear Lucas nearly blow a fuse. "No he doesn't," she corrected. "Brooke, stop causing trouble."

"It was just a joke, don't kill me," she put her hands up. "So does Jake know that Lucas is here? Because I just saw him and he wasn't crying about it…I mean…he didn't mention it," she gave Lucas a little nudge.

"Brooke!" Peyton admonished. "Why don't you come in my room and help me pick out something to wear. Lucas, are you going to be okay out here with Jenny?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine."

Lucas sat down on the couch and looked at a visibly bored Jenny, sucking on her pacifier and playing with her hair. "Hey Jenny," Lucas said to the little girl. "You remember me? I used to know your dad." Just as he said that, he heard a knock on the door.

"I'll be right back."

Lucas opened the door to find Jake standing in the hallway. "Hi Jake."

"Lu-Lucas, wow it's…um…it's really nice to see you! How are you?"

"I'm good. It's good to see you too man," he chuckled. "It's been a long time."

"It sure has," Jake answered back, not really knowing what else to say.

Lucas smiled and moved out of the way so he could walk into the apartment.

Jake spotted Jenny and the little girl climbed onto his lap as he sat down on the couch. "So did Peyton tell you about the show I'm doing tonight?"

"Yeah, she invited me to come. It's really cool that you're still doing the music thing. Peyton seems to be very excited about your music."

"I hope so. She's really trying to get me signed and move up the ranks of the label. This big shot A&R executive is going to be at the show to watch me and another band Peyton discovered. They're called _Mystical Ingenuity _and they're really good. Peyton did a great job discovering them on the underground circuit. I'm really proud of her."

"Yeah me too," Lucas said a bit dryly.

It shouldn't bother him to hear another guy say he's proud of Peyton, but it did. He wasn't jealous, but there was something disconcerting about not knowing much about something so important in Peyton's life. He couldn't help but resent Jake slightly and even Peyton. He still wanted to know why she hadn't answered his email that he sent more than a week ago. He wanted so badly to fit into Peyton's world, but in seven short months it seemed as though she had built a solid foundation without him.

On cue, Peyton stepped out of her room with a giggling Brooke behind her. She looked incredible in a Radiohead band tee and a pair of skin tight black leather pants and black cowboy boots.

"I'm guessing Brooke didn't pick that out," Lucas joked.

"No I didn't," she pouted.

"I picked out a black satin dress that shows every inch of her legs. I was trying to help you guys out," Brooke said with a smile.

"Brooke!" Peyton hissed.

Lucas and Jake smiled uneasy smiles and turned to look at Peyton.

"So, Jake have you and Lucas gotten all caught up? How long has it been since you guys have spoken?"

"Umm…it's been awhile," Lucas answered, not particularly interested in awkward small talk. "We have plenty of time to catch up," he said with a half smile.

Lucas walked over to the closet, pulled Peyton's leather jacket off the hanger and held it out her to slip her arms through. "You look amazing," he whispered in her ear.

She blushed and then leaned down to kiss a sleeping Lily, securely tucking in a blanket and quietly snoring in her crib. "Be good Lils." Then she walked over to Jenny and gave her a little kiss on the forehead. Lucas and Jake said goodbye to their respective girls and Brooke told them all not to worry and have a good time. She tugged at Peyton's jacket as she walked to the door and whispered, "Am I the only one seeing the hot threesome possibilities you've got going for you?"

"Brooke you're crazy and that's never going to happen. Be back later tonight," she gave Brooke a kiss on the cheek.

Peyton walked towards Lucas and grabbed his hand as he shot Brooke the evil eye over his shoulder. Jake was already out the door.

---

When they arrived at the restaurant, Jake excused himself and headed backstage to go prepare for the show. Lucas and Peyton found a table, silently glad to have some time alone. She reached across the table and grabbed his hand, "So are you okay? I know you just got here and we're already out on the LA scene."

"I'm fine Peyt."

She gave him look that said she didn't really believe him, and he clarified, "Okay this is a little overwhelming," he admitted. "But I just love being here with you. Nothing is going to ruin that."

"I love being here with you too. I know you're slightly uncomfortable about the Jake stuff, but you know you have nothing to worry about, right?"

"Of course."

She gave him a look that he knew was reserved for him, and they just sat in silence for a few moments, Lucas idly rubbing his thumb over Peyton's knuckles. She smiled and gave his hand a squeeze before her phone started ringing. She checked the caller ID and answered, "Hey Tony! Are the boys here yet?"

"Wait what? What kind of problems?" she yelled into the receiver. She put up a finger and signaled to Lucas that she would be right back. Ten minutes later she was back. "I'm so sor—"

"Don't apologize Peyton. Do whatever you need to do. I'll be fine."

She kissed him on the cheek, "See this is why I love you."

The show was about to start and Lucas watched Peyton as she watched the stage. She had this sparkle in her eyes and her enthusiasm was so evident. When Jake's set was over, _Mystical Ingenuity _stepped onto the stage and blew everyone away. The night was successful to say the least. Lucas tried his best to stay out of Peyton's way and he just watched as she talked to various executives who were present at the showcase. He noticed how she used her hands when she spoke and how big her eyes got when she explained something to someone.

Jake joined them at the table after his performance and Peyton called him over to talk to an A&R executive, leaving Lucas all alone at the table. They talked for quite awhile as Lucas tried to keep from looking bored while sitting at the table. A half an hour later and they still weren't done talking to the A&R guy. He pulled out his phone to call Brooke, but he didn't get that far. He heard Peyton yelling his name across the room, "Lucas!"

He looked up and saw Peyton, Jake, the A&R guy and some other people staring at him as Peyton waved him over. He got up and walked over to stand at Peyton's side. "You guy's, this is Lucas Scott, my better half," she smiled up at him. He mirrored her broad smile back at her.

"So this is the infamous Lucas that I've heard so much about," said one of the ladies. "Peyton says that you're an author and that you influenced some of her musical tastes. She also said you pushed her to come out to LA. We're glad you did."

Lucas' cheeks reddened at the thought of Peyton gushing over him. "Peyton did it all on her own, I don't deserve any credit. And I'm not really an author. You need to have a book published first," he laughed.

"Well I'm sure you'll get there," the woman said with a smile. "If you're anything like Peyton, our new youngest Junior A&R executive, you'll definitely get there."

Lucas' eyes widened and he pulled Peyton into his arms, "Really? That's incredible."

"I'll say. I can't believe I went from working in a mailroom to this."

"Hard work, plus a few job openings and there you have it," the A&R guy stated. "Peyton we're glad to have you on our team. Goodnight everyone."

"Thank you," Peyton said gratefully. "See you tomorrow."

When they all left, Peyton turned towards Jake and hi-fived him for such a great performance. "This is only the beginning Jake." He smiled and nodded his head as Peyton turned towards Lucas and hugged him tightly.

"I'm so glad that I can share this with you," she whispered sweetly. "But I can tell you were a little surprised, when I called you over to meet my bosses, weren't you?"

"Yeah I was, but it was a nice surprise. When we get home, I want you to tell me more about this job any other bands you're scouting. I want to know everything."

Lucas gave her an Eskimo kiss and held her hand as they walked to Jake's car. He was on cloud nine, not only because of Peyton's success, but mainly because of how she made him feel like he was a part of it instead of being in the way of it. The last thing he wanted to do was hinder her in any way.

Tonight made him feel so much better about the engagement ring he had in his suitcase.

But all Peyton could think about was Lucas calling her apartment, _home_.


End file.
